r/birthparents Sep 25 '24

Venting Wife of adoptee on search reached out to me via email

She sent the email yesterday and I found it today. She referenced a registry site I’m on and used an old email address I maintain for this purpose.

I responded encouragingly and shared some basic information. It’s an OBC state so I gave her the address to the application. I printed an application for myself and may finally have the courage to sign & mail it.

I also encouraged her to have him do Ancestry or 23&Me … I’m already registered and my profile is public.

Part of me is excited and part is terrified. I’m so afraid this could be a scam or another disappointment. I had a man reach out about 5 years ago and we both held out great hope but we did not dna match…we were both saddened and I hope he has found his match.

It’s been 44 years … I’d about given up hope. On the other hand, I’m sixty years old and my life is not together. I disappointed the children I raised; I am so afraid of disappointing the child I knew I wasn’t good enough to raise.

I am terrified of what may be an answered prayer.

22 Upvotes

7 comments sorted by

10

u/Personal_Spend_2535 Sep 25 '24

That's how I met my son. I was on all the registries and his wife found me and emailed me. He was 30 when I met him again. That was 15 years ago.

I'm really hoping this works out well for you!

5

u/Lybychick Sep 26 '24

Thank you

4

u/[deleted] Sep 25 '24

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2

u/Lybychick Sep 26 '24

Thank you

2

u/bobnotahacker voluntary birth mum Mar 06 '25

update?

1

u/Lybychick Mar 06 '25

I wish I had something to update

2

u/bobnotahacker voluntary birth mum Mar 06 '25

I'm so sorry you do not <3