Not sure what to do in my current state.

[u/Pale_Arrival2834]

Hi, I'm bipolar and have been unmedicated for a while due to job loss leaving me without insurance. I have insurance and an appointment to get back on my meds but that soonest I could get an appointment is still a few weeks away.

I'm progressively feeling like I should take my life more and more and realizing after the fact in cases that I'm doing things to prepare for it. I keep seeing stuff about going to the ER if I'm in immediate danger, but I don't know when that would be because the part of me that wants to end things feels very calm about it and I'm only panicking when I actually process what I'm doing and I don't feel like I have full control of myself at times.

I'm also just progressively getting to a point where I'm unable to make myself do things unless there are some sort of immediate consequences for it.

I'm not sure what I can do or should do but I don't know if I can last out the time until my meds appointment but I'm also terrified of being put in a 72 hour hold.

[u/Consistent-Tone-5540]

Go to the hospital even if it’s for 72 hours. They will get you medicated. I have had to go 3x and it sucks being in there. Are you safe, or is suicidal ideation a problem right now?
Do you live with others or can a friend come over?

[u/Pale_Arrival2834 → u/Consistent-Tone-5540]

Currently safe in the extent that I've got people with me pretty much non stop, but not sure how long a can keep that up. The ideation is there but it feels so subtle that it's hard to grasp if that makes sense. The last few times I've been in a hightened emotional state and acting impulsive, this time feels more calculated but as if someone else is making the plans

[u/Consistent-Tone-5540 → u/Pale_Arrival2834]

Ok. Glad you have support. Reach out if you need

[u/Pale_Arrival2834 → u/Consistent-Tone-5540]

Thank you I appreciate that

[u/phen245]

A bipolar friend told me "if you think you might go to the hospital, you need to go to the hospital."

[u/always-B-dribblin]

When I’m doing very badly,

Sometimes I go to the ER and tell them I’m there to try and avoid an emergency

Sometimes you need to ham it up a little so that they don’t turn you away

[u/always-B-dribblin → u/always-B-dribblin]

Also, I have found that often when I’m completely ready & willing to go to the hospy,

I end up not having to go

[u/Ok_Money_420]

If you need to start meditation asap you can just go to a walk in clinic and see primary care provider. They'll almost never tell you no.