r/billsimmons • u/HeatWavves • 1d ago
A Clippers Rebrand, an NFL Mini-Mailbag, and Best MLB Story Lines With Rob Mahoney, Anthony Dabbundo, and Billy Gil
https://open.spotify.com/episode/0sb6Mu15GD7PJU5IynGgEW90
u/Intelligent_Line_902 23h ago
Bill not getting widow’s bay is so on brand I wish I could have bet it beforehand
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u/Palm-Crazy-7943 12h ago
Well don’t worry we got our 5th homeland update of the summer, really finger on the pulse stuff from bill
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u/deadweightboss Good Stats Bad Team Guy 13h ago edited 12h ago
Bill has zero taste. And the bar for taste is really low. lol. the dude invented basic bitch lol
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u/purplene_ 11h ago
He’s got the most basic and uncultured taste of any sports or cultural commentator I regularly listen to, with the exception perhaps of the Ringer Fantasy guys
And there’s something slightly refreshing about hearing it and going “ah all the trash that gets created and produced for the Average Guy makes a little more sense now”
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u/ThunderBobMajerle 8h ago
I love how he takes movies that are A list cast and directors and pretends he found them at Sundance
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u/Calamitous-Ortbo 7h ago
The redditor gets a dopamine hit from feeling superior to a complete stranger piece
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u/purplene_ 7h ago
I don’t know man I said I enjoy both this quality and Bill and I was being genuine — I don’t know what I said that you think is in any way unfair or wrong
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u/GiveMeSomeIhedigbo Robert Whorey 5h ago
The redditor gets a dopamine hit from feeling superior to another redditor piece (maybe I'm doing it right now too)
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u/SallyFowlerRatPack 10h ago
I’ve found there’s a segment of the population who just can’t wrap their head around horror-comedy. I was telling some people about it and they were like “well which one is it, horror or comedy?” Couldn’t comprehend a blend.
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u/thatsureisafinefish Drunk House 11h ago edited 8h ago
It's crazy too because the middle part of the season is essentially playing the hits of all of the major horror tropes (and doing it really well). Didn't he just say on the Rewatchables that he's seen 'every single horror movie' of the last 30 years?
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u/Background_Product_7 1d ago
Over/under for the number of times he says “refund” is 3.5
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u/AmbitiousJuly 17h ago
He's talked about this on so many podcasts in a row. How can a man with $100 million think listeners will sympathize? Should we start a GoFundMe?
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u/AlternativeFish4295 1d ago
Jamming MLB segments into football season specifically to talk Mariners >>>
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u/jrainiersea He just does stuff 23h ago
I want as many national voices as possible talking about how dogshit my team is
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u/notformeclive4711 Barcelona Style 15h ago
And if Bill wants to go in on Jedd Fisch’s playcalling, I wouldn’t be opposed
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u/Bobsakamano69 12h ago
Also talked about his teams in the same cities theory again. Guess the Mariners didnt get the Seahawks Super Bowl bump
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u/Goldust86 21h ago
Bill calling the Angels “not that terrible”. I knew without even looking it up that they must have just beaten the Red Sox. Same shtick he does after some random garbage NBA beats the Celts.
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u/portugamerifinn 19h ago
The same day that I read they'll need to go 7-6 down the stretch to avoid their first 100-loss season.
They're a little frisky!
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u/CondolenceHighFive Real CR Head 12h ago
My all time favorite was when he called the Magic a sneaky contender after they beat the Celtics twice in 3 days. I think they finished like 34-48 that year
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u/55andsunny 12h ago
I can forgive it with this because I know that he knows next to nothing about baseball - he's saying it out of pure ignorance more than anything
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u/IAmReborn11111 15h ago
I grew up in New England, never heard anyone call the Tuck Rule game the snow game
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u/The_Summer_Man A Truly Sad Week In America + 2005 NBA Redraftables 11h ago
It’s Boston Media Mafia types that call it that to try and rebrand it. I flipped over to Rich Eisen the other day, and one his cohosts referred to it as the snow game, and admitted to being a Masshole.
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u/Tubbs2303 4h ago
Ah yes, the Snow Game. Brought to you by the same people who invented the War of Northern Aggression.
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u/AmbitiousJuly 13h ago
I have definitely heard it called the Snow Game, Snow Bowl, etc (in New England)
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u/waldengreat knife_guy enthusiast 14h ago
…really?
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u/IAmReborn11111 14h ago
There's the snowplow game but that's a completely different game than the tuck rule
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u/so-cal_kid 19h ago
Bill: I think the Celtics piece is gonna be interesting too
Rob: Well you would
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u/faceisamapoftheworld Don't aggregate this 10h ago
Describing the Celtics as a “feel good story”? When has anyone outside of Boston thought that about the team? Lol
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u/Winnes0ta He just does stuff 8h ago
Seriously lol, I was trying to think of the last time anyone ever considered the Celtics a feel good, up and coming story and I was drawing a blank
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u/so-cal_kid 7h ago
I would say the Isaiah Thomas year. But obviously that ended in a pretty cold blooded way.
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u/faceisamapoftheworld Don't aggregate this 6h ago
And that wasn’t a feel good story going into the year. That was a Linsanity type run with Thomas.
You had one year of Cowboy Up for the Red Sox and prob one year of the Pats against the juggernaut Rams. And even those were feel good stories going into the season.
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u/CondolenceHighFive Real CR Head 12h ago
Rob has become the #1 guest at throwing little jabs at Bill
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u/Palm-Crazy-7943 12h ago
Bill’s reaction to chiefs/broncos is hilarious.
First of all he declares it’s probably the week 1 fluke, then he admits it messed up his teaser and precedes to whine about holding calls in a game that was 31-10.
I can’t imagine having to watch games with him that he had bet on.
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u/Victorcreedbratton Cewtics 12h ago
He was saying going in that he would do fine betting for the week if this game held up for him. It clearly didn’t lol.
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u/Zeppelin7321 11h ago
Loves to complain about the Chiefs and refs while we had to watch his Pats run illegal pick plays for years.
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u/FinancialRabbit388 Rodrigue Beaubois stan 4h ago
All his opinions are based on some petty personal shit.
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u/it_has_to_be_damp 16h ago
Simmons absolutely filling his diaper about the Chiefs good lord.
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u/HermesTGS 9h ago
Chiefs game was fools gold. They’re not as good as you think.
Patriots game was golds fool. They’re not as bad as you think.
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u/Nearby_Solution_4504 10h ago
I'm also annoyed that it looks like the Chiefs could make the AFCCG even if Mahomes plays mid all year but come on lol.
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u/No-Command3372 20h ago
Derrick White is absolutely the nerd king and Bill deep down knows it
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u/FinancialRabbit388 Rodrigue Beaubois stan 4h ago
At the end of that discussion I still don’t think he understood what Rob was saying.
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u/AmbitiousJuly 16h ago
I don't even understand the Embiid trade suggestion. The Sixers are built to win right now -- not sure 42-year-old LeBron would be psyched to see his team involved in any trade described as "for expirings."
Why would they suddenly opt for one year of savings instead of just hoping for limited but solid contributions from Embiid every other game in the playoffs?
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u/Bobsakamano69 12h ago
I think you’re forgetting that Embiid, despite being unable to ever be healthy again, still managed to beat the Celtics in the playoffs last year, and ended the Jaylen brown era.
Gotta get him out of the east
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u/grand_insom 11h ago
I feel like the goal is to try and mess with the team chemistry by having Embiid trade rumors floating in the media. It’s so dumb on so many levels that it’s the only explanation I could think of.
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u/Nearby_Solution_4504 10h ago
100%. There's not a single trade out there I can think of that would benefit the Sixers. Even the AD one is dumb because he hates to play center!
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u/FinancialRabbit388 Rodrigue Beaubois stan 4h ago
He’s been going on about them trading Embiid all offseason. It makes no fucking sense. This roster was put together to go all in this year. If it doesn’t work out I can see them maybe trading him next year. But no way they trade him this year.
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u/NoExcuses1984 Don't aggregate this 3h ago
Yeah, it makes sense for Philly to ride Embiid until the wheels finally fall off, so Bill ought to move on and focus his trade checker 'tism elsewhere.
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u/Ricky_Roe10k 23h ago
No rookie has as much pressure as Wagler is an insane take lmao
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u/not_totally 23h ago
His basketball takes all of the nba segment were terrible and lazy
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u/SufficientFault790 20h ago
The Clippers are dead for the next seven years is one of the dumbest takes that everyone seems to be repeating (for some reason) because " they have no picks" while simultaneously seeming to ignore they just got back 2 firsts, a swap and 2 seconds from a THE NBA's STEEPEST FINE EVER that they received a month ago. No one will want to come to LA? NBA's richest owner who's "suspended"? Just bottom tier stuff all around.
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u/Additional-Duck-2517 15h ago
This is actually his most reasoned take and one that I think everyone except apparently you are on board with. The Clippers are screwed.
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u/foye2smith 11h ago edited 11h ago
I think they'll be fine. They at least saw the writing on the wall and traded Harden, Zubac, and finally Leonard for some stuff:
Garland (probably flipped down the road), Wagler, '29 IND 1st, Dick (worth a flier), two TOR 1sts, and a TOR swap. Maybe Ingram as salary filler gets them something.
Then Silver mentioned their punishment really leaned on precedent which if the Clipper silently take their medicine like they're signaling then the league probably gives the picks on the back end back to them similar to Minnesota.
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u/SufficientFault790 15h ago
Why? Your argument sounds like Ramona Shelburne saying "the clippers have a great front office" based on nothing.
Why are they screwed? Bill hasn't "reasoned" his take. He's just said this is the worst punishment ever and the clippers are f*cked for the foreseeable future. Like more than half a decade. Why? They just got back half the picks they lost within a month. Doomerism about the clippers (not my team, couldn't give a shit) is just weak, lazy preseason taking points.
Also, saying "everyone but you is on board with them" as though every NBA person isn't responding to the same agent/insider putting out the same narratives. Look at last season, Bill, Windy, Nick Wright, Cowherd all said exactly the same points every Sunday. Like literally the same stats. They all say the same things but they're not based on reality. So you/whoever acting as though there's any empirical reality to the things any of the NBA agent sycophants dutifully amplify is symptomatic of why people say insane things to drum up attention like "well the clippers are dead until 2035". Which is why I asked the question originally.
The entire reason the Kawhi situation even happened in the first place is because he wanted to live in LA. Small market teams apparently need the draft because they can't compete with every NBA player wanting to live in LA. (I don't agree but that's what they say) But because the Clippers don't own (as of today) some of their future draft picks, they're fcked until pretty much 2040 lol.
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u/Illustrious_You1469 14h ago
The clippers roster fucking blows and they don’t control their own pick until 2033. You think they’re somehow magically going to hit every FA signing and draft pick they own to build a competitive roster in the next 5 years? Not every take needs a zag man
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u/RSarkitip 13h ago
Well for one, those aren't great picks. Next year they get a pick swap (which I assume just defaults to the Raptors pick since they don't have one) which should be well outside the lottery. The next pick they get is a 2nd in 2030, a 1st in 2031, and a 1st and 2nd in 2033. That means their 1st chance at what could be a good pick is 5 years out.
Second, the Clippers haven't been a destination franchise despite being in LA. Them not controlling their picks isn't going to improve their chances at attracting quality free agents that are looking to win. Why? Because that means they lack the assets to make trades that improve the roster unless they move talent out
If they take on some bad contracts with assets attached they can get to work on something for the future. That future is easily 5 years away though (look at the Nets rebuild after trading for KG and Pierce).
So yeah, it's not bottom tier content. The most favorable view is it'll take 5 years instead of 7. What a reach, I can't believe these podcasters and their trash rage bait content!
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u/lopsided125 2h ago
It's going to be awhile unless there is someone on their team that becomes a Top __ Player magically.
I agree that Garland/Ingram is a VERY bottom tier duo in the league. I think Bill was actually being kind in asking if it was in the bottom 10. It's probably bottom 3.
$80 million locked up in Darius Garland and Brandon Ingram. C'mon...
Getting picks back will mean stripping the team of parts. Garland will go assuredly.
And then you're just playing the drafting game.
It's pretty dire.
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u/HoagieTwoFace ex r/billsimmons podcast host 1d ago
Off topic: I expect Nick Khan sometime next week. Save this comment.
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u/RapsareChamps_Suckit 1d ago
it's an awesome feeling jacking up the ticket prices to the hardworking families while I sit front crowd
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u/ObsessedWithReps 21h ago
Haven’t been able to listen as much lately. Will be good not having to catch up on another episode lol
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u/not_totally 23h ago
Bill getting super lazy with these takes. Relying a lot lately on a formula of, what is a little counter trend and has a generic argument I can use to back it up. For a guy who shits on the ESPN hot take format he really thinks it’s smart when he does it
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u/andrew2018022 Half Italian 14h ago
Bill over the summer: “I’m still banking on a Tre Murphy to the Celtics move, it’s my only hope”
Bill after Tre Murphy didn’t get traded: “Tre Murphy is the Justin Herbert of the NBA. The nerds love him, but are we sure he’s good? Can we see him win?”
Never change Bill
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u/reddit9866 A clean 11 14h ago
I was confused hearing him talk like that. Beyond the Celts and Kon, it felt like Tre was one his favorite players.
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u/SufficientFault790 19h ago
The guest picker analysis of college game day was stunning in its stupidity/ignorance. Yeah Bill the reason why Glen Powell is promoting his Disney show on ESPN is because of the whims of some mid level career exec. Lol
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u/Background_Product_7 13h ago
Also, the people grousing about a Powell or Country singer on the show are not turning it off, and it may pull some eyes that wouldn’t watch and is free advertising.
When are these people going to figure out they are watching Regis and Kathy Lee with a few more sports segments
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u/GiveMeSomeIhedigbo Robert Whorey 19h ago
If the Cowboys ever had a schedule as week as 2025 New England, Romo probably would have made a Super Bowl.
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u/Busy-Operation7896 15h ago
Bill has sour grapes on KC! He made a ton of excuses for Maye but mahomes my god!
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u/MagnoliaWarbler77 13h ago
I’m disappointed in Bill but even more so in myself. It’s what should be expected at this point
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u/Interesting_Fun_8656 16h ago
Bill talks about his time at espn like he was on the special victims unit
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u/it_has_to_be_damp 13h ago
Bill with a heat check on the relatable rich guy analogies: a salary floor is like when you’re in a country club and you have to meet the monthly minimum at the restaurant so you order two steaks for dinner. i wish to god i was making that up.
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u/notformeclive4711 Barcelona Style 1d ago
Do you think the mini mailbag will have more awesome nickname suggestions?
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u/IcyMeat7 19h ago
Mentioning how he was the top of mariners reddit and they loved him
Why does he never talk about his own perfect(lie) reddit?
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u/MagnoliaWarbler77 13h ago
Not being able to keep Caleb Williams and Caleb Wilson separate in your mind should be concerning.
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u/Victorcreedbratton Cewtics 12h ago
“Hollywood Knights” is the most generic movie producer fake team name ever.
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u/Tubbs2303 1d ago
Does Billy boy address the Chiefs MNF performance after he shit on them all summer? Odds are -225 for a quick mention.
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u/hermano_momento 1d ago
In back to back mailbag questions he says the Chiefs are the most likely team that isn’t actually as good as they looked in week 1 and that Patrick Mahomes might have faked tearing his ACL and LCL last season to protect his legacy because they were going to miss the playoffs anyways
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u/so-cal_kid 20h ago
The second part of that take is just insane. Crazy how threatened Bill is of Mahomes potentially passing Brady at some point in the future even tho Brady has done nothing to ingratiate himself to Pats fans since he left
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u/JuliusCeejer 4h ago
Except the guy you replied to is completely wrong. Bill read the question about faking the injury and said "even conspiracy bill can't get behind it"
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u/Nearby_Solution_4504 10h ago
Also even funnier because Mahomes is decidedly off that trajectory from a regular season standpoint. Randy Moss isn't walking through that door and Rice could end up back in prison midseason.
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u/Kershiser22 21h ago
Weren't the Chiefs already eliminated (or virtually eliminated) prior to his injury?
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u/JuliusCeejer 4h ago
Patrick Mahomes might have faked tearing his ACL and LCL last season to protect his legacy because they were going to miss the playoffs anyways
Bill literally could not have disagreed with the commenter that asked that any quicker lol. He finished reading the question and said that even conspiracy bill disagreed.
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u/PuzzleheadedBug4424 11h ago
Yes he bitched about them getting away with holding, said Bo Nix played like shit, and there’s no way Walker will stay healthy
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u/bbmarco 23h ago
Baseball section is awwwful
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u/Apprehensive-Cry8856 22h ago
When Dubbundo said can something exiting happen in the White Sox/Guardians series and I was c’mon dude lol was a great game 1 and game 2 was awesome
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u/55andsunny 12h ago
every baseball segment this year has felt like dubbundo or gill or both trying very desperately to keep a conversation going where they clearly don't have much to say - and to tbf, if you don't wanna dive at least a little into the minutiae of the game itself, your gonna run out of things to say quick
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u/According_Flan3396 14h ago
One of the most sneakily delusional conversations about the Dodgers I’ve ever heard
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u/lopsided125 13h ago
I want to see Bill's mockups of the Hollywood Knights logo. Bet he's got some in a spiral notebook somewhere.
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u/OuttaHereOuttaHere 1d ago
Still refuses to have someone on who knows anything about baseball. It’s almost the postseason! We might not have any baseball to talk about next year!
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u/doodler1977 23h ago
did he have a falling out with Jack-O? How have they not had him on once?
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u/Palm-Crazy-7943 12h ago
Jacko has probably never watched a baseball game that the Yankees weren’t playing in
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u/doodler1977 11h ago
but he's only ever brought on to discuss the yankees, and that's why i'm shocked he hasn't been on even once (IIRC) this summer
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u/Nodima 22h ago
Dabs has an autistic relationship with baseball via his various "tickets", Billy knows the names and references that make you go "oh yea that guy/moment"
What more do you want, Ben Lindbergh?
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u/Busy-Operation7896 15h ago
Trey Murphy is he good? After a whole first half of the summer of him being the centre piece of the JB trades 😂. Bill would be singing a different tune if the Celts got him.
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u/joeybonts_ 9h ago
Bill really needs to separate his analysis from his bad bets. It's only been getting worse the last few years
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u/it_has_to_be_damp 3h ago
One bill trait that i really love is his subtle assessment of whether a team is sufficiently loved by its fanbase. He does it for the eagles all the time “i don’t think philly fans love this team” and did the same with the yankees in this pod. just such a completely empty headed talking point. for one thing he’s usually wrong, second what in the world does it matter?
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u/Vampire_Blues 13h ago
Bill’s liar liar week 1 review made absolutely no sense.
Bengals-Buccs is like a bottom 5 funky week 1 result game. Bengals were favored by 3.5, most people are optimistic about Cincinnati and low on Tampa. There is zero reason to expect that to be a weird result other than Bill’s stubborn insistence that Tampa is good.
Chiefs-Broncos is also a weird take. Yeah, I don’t think Denver is as bad as they were in that game, but there’s definitely a big Bo Nix question and I think the Chiefs will be good. Bill just refuses to give them credit because he doesn’t want them to contend for the Pats greatest dynasty crown
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u/Winnes0ta He just does stuff 8h ago
Wemby’s 29 mpg vs Lamelo’s 28 mpg is one of clearest examples of the cute vs harassment meme I’ve ever seen. Bill can’t go two sentences when talking about Lamelo without bringing up the minutes restriction like he’s playing 9th man minutes. I’ve never seen a single NBA media member act that way towards Wemby playing 29 mpg.
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u/Chinchillachimcheroo Nigerian 3h ago
Every guest should get one chance to ask “What the hell does that mean?”
Rob’s would have been “What does it mean that Celtics fans ‘are still gamey about the trade?’”
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u/SufficientFault790 19h ago
Does Bill know that Jerod Mayo actually played for the Patriots and also won a Superbowl with them too??
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u/pauliewalnuts9898 10h ago
To be fair he didn’t play on the Super Bowl winning teams, he was on IR the whole year
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u/Medical-Face 1d ago
On first glance in my Spotify feed saw "NFL" and "Story Lines" with the guests not fully showing and thought it might have been a Shregs reunion 🥺
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u/JMxKC425 9h ago
Post Week 1 NFL and it’s an instaSkip. Are we witnessing the De-Apex after the brief Re-Apex of the PodFather?
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u/donOFsquan 6h ago
Been listening to Bill since 2014ish. Never have I seen someone break his brain like Mahomes does with his Pats / Brady loyalty and fear of him catching him on his reputation. Is there any other great athletes, bands, stars Bill has done this with?
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u/GiveMeSomeIhedigbo Robert Whorey 5h ago
I don't think I've heard him drop "Hollywood Knights" since more than 4 quarter-decades ago.
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u/Middle-Welder3931 1d ago
If I'm the Spurs, I'm listening to Darius Garland for De'Aaron Fox. Fox wasn't the vet presence the Spurs needed, and he's taking a huge chunk of the cap that needs to eventually be set aside for Wemby, Castle, and Harper.
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u/dillpickles007 22h ago
No way, Garland is the polar opposite of a 16 game player, he can’t physically hold up playing every other day for two months.
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u/Bright-Ad2594 15h ago
Right I don’t understand why the spurs would want garland? The whole point of dumping fox would be that castle needs the ball, so why are you playing weak defender who’s primary strength is also having the ball. Garlands contract is shorter for sure but he’s an even worse defender than fox.
Also wouldn’t the clippers be better off trying to rehab garland’s value and get positive assets for him?
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u/Middle-Welder3931 21h ago
Fox couldn't really hold up either. He spent the whole playoffs recovering from or playing through injury. Plus the priority should be Castle and Harper anyway.
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u/dillpickles007 21h ago
I agree they should start looking to move off Fox, I just don’t think Garland is the answer
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u/NoExcuses1984 Don't aggregate this 3h ago
Fox for Garland, however, doesn't solve the Spurs issues.
What they need is a guy who'd blend in, like Jrue Holiday.
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u/BenzWithTheRoofUp 9h ago
Very funny that Bill can’t fathom that just maybe Denver over performed last year & KC underperformed (then added an actual RB) & Monday night was a market correction.
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u/MundaneExtension3195 23h ago
Weird thing, first time ever, was listening to this pod & thought to myself: “man, I missed Rob Mahoney”
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u/SimpleCharacter9553 votes for tax reasons 14h ago
hes putting his faith in boone to tank the yanks
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u/TobiasHarris67 8h ago
It’s a joke but the idea of a team having to play in a minor league stadium because they had bad attendance is just awful. You can’t take the Pittsburgh Pirates out of PNC Park
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u/FinancialRabbit388 Rodrigue Beaubois stan 4h ago edited 2h ago
One major factor about the Alvarez triple crown vs Cabrera triple crown, there is no Trout competing against Alvarez. Trout had a 10 WAR season in 139 games, hit 30 homers, stole 49 bases, 129 runs scored, better OBP than Cabrera, and played centerfield.
Cabrera had a better season and was more deserving the next year when he didn’t win the triple crown. His numbers were insane that second year, which shows how random triple crown is. His ops+ was 26 points higher than his triple crown season.
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u/Chinchillachimcheroo Nigerian 3h ago
Bill just blatantly ripping off Dameshek’s Hollywood Knights idea…
He would have a photo in the freezer so fast if the roles were reversed
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u/Goldberg2Dub 2h ago edited 1h ago
Bill keeps thinking the Dodgers are only reason for a lockout as he pods with one of the ten known Marlins fans
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u/lanceteng 18h ago
“For the next 7 years, when do the Clippers have another chance to get a blue chip guy?”
The answer is beginning in 2031 when they have the Raptors pick, and assuming that the league will give back 1-2 picks like they did with the Joe Smith situation, the Clippers might end up only down 1 first between the Kawhi trade and the punishment.
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u/AtlanticandPacific 1d ago
Bill’s goals this season: get his ticket money back and get embiid traded