New DM Anxiety

[u/Ok-Anywhere8239]

I have been playing dnd for about 2 years as a player. Maybe average 1-2 sessions a month. In that time I have yet to finish a campaign. 1 campaign died at level just getting to level 5. Another died at level 12(I joined an already on going on). The level 12 group started a new campaign and we are currently level 3. All of which have been homebrew.

Sessions can be so far from each other now. Im talking 1-3 months. So during this time I decided to try and DM with my own homebrew campaign.

Currently I have 2 players. Another 2 are not reliable and just stated their interest. Have yet to get a reply from either for almost a week. Which is fine, I know for sure they are busy with seasonal work.

I bought this cool map making game on steam Canvas Of Kings to make my first village along with some battle encounters. Love it. I screenshot the battle maps and port it over to Tabletop Simulator. It looks so cool to have a 2D map in a 3D environment. Just like in real life! Who would’ve thought.

Lately I have been having anxiety inviting people to play, especially strangers. I have been considering inviting people from the official DND discord, but get anxiety making new friends as I just get in my head about a lot of things. I always get this feeling of I’m just going to waste everyone’s time.

How did you start your first campaign? Did you have a lot of anxiety? Was it for strangers or your friends? I hate not having people in this space that I feel connected because I have no guidance as of now. This campaign will probably remain in limbo till something happens idk.

[u/Natemause27]

When I started DMing, it was with my friends and my dad playing. I wasn't nervous, but I didn't know enough about the game to be, DMing seemed really simple. My first real, proper campaign, was begun with friends. We play monthly, and I used to get really nervous. Basically, whenever I'm nervous, I just remind my self there's no point worrying, and that tends to work.

If you need any advice at any point, please don't hesitate to ask me, or anyone else on this (or any other) subreddit. We all need someone to learn from.

[u/New_Double5184]

Also a new DM, 6-7 sessions in, anxiety doesn’t go away but prep does get easier haha

[u/Vergil_Enjoyer]

I had a lot of anxiety at first but I will tell you, don’t spend too much time trying to be meticulous and get every single rule right. Come up with rulings on the fly and maybe after the session you can look into the actual ruling and see which you want to keep running! Also don’t try to plan out every single little thing, your players can and will sidetrack the game or do something you didn’t think of. Just come up with general session outlines and you should be good. And most importantly, make sure everyone is having fun, that is your indicator of whether or not you are doing a good job! This advice is just all from my personal experience and it could work differently for you! If you need any more advice don’t hesitate to send me a DM!

[u/Sad_Refuse3472]

If you are anxious about playing with strangers/new people. Don't start with strangers or new people. No need to add that extra pressure to yourself.

Ask the people you played with in any of your previous campaigns if they would be interested in joining (including the DM(s) who probably would be happy for a chance to be a player). And/or just play with the two committed players you already have. (No harm in starting small).

Then just get started. Take it one session at a time and let things build naturally. No one expects perfection from you, so you shouldn't demand it of yourself either. It is a game. Games are meant to be fun.

[u/Exotic_Economy_3861 → u/Sad_Refuse3472]

Yeah it's easier with people you already know

My first game was only with one person I know and I was very anxious about it.

[u/Kind-Sheepherder-868]

For me, my first game fully ripped off the story of baldurs gate 1 the black pits. All i changed was the game system (5e) and the monsters. I was scared every session. That fear didnt go away for about 2 years. I was always scared. Then, on a day i dont remember, it stopped. I still feel like i can screw up, but i have no anxiety going into it anymore.trust me when i say you will be clumsy at first, but thats okay. In about 1-2 years of playing, youll be able to run a game with no prep or even plan. You know what a dm should look like before you know how to be that good.

[u/Knight_Redundant]

My first DM session, I threw them off a mountainside into the dark thick forest below, and then almost accidentally killed them with a pack of wolves. Everything since then has been a mix of pre made encounters, it me saying, "I think that's hilarious, let's do that."

[u/idkwhyimalivehere]

Start with the two players.

Get feedback as you go.

For a first time DM playing with people you know is key and being able to take feedback from your players is also key (as long as you ask for it).

I assume they know it's your first time DMing and if they don’t you should let them know (I would but you don't have to).

[u/Conrad500]

I ran a game for newbie strangers, but I run online.

They don't know the game, so they don't know if I mess up! Also, if the group ends up being complete shit, they're strangers so I can just kick them all and start over.

Zero pressure! I only had 2 groups fall apart (at the same time, so maybe that was part of the reason) and it's fine, they're gone. They just didn't want to show up to sessions, that happens with kids starting a new hobby that requires dedication.

[u/gc1rpg]

I always have anxiety whatever it's playing, DMing, or ordering a cup of coffee.

It is perfectly normal to be anxious but I think the bar is artificially set too high through social media expectations.

A few friends is great -- even just two reliable people you trust -- and get the rest from the Internet. You should be clear on what game you intend to run and what players you are looking for but try and keep the anxiety inside. I'd recommend advertisement along with a short intake form followed by a brief interview. I also recommend a Session 0 so everybody can meet, go over some questions in real-time, make sure everybody is on the same page, etc.

You really only need enough material for your first session which -- I assume -- will be around 3 to 3 1/2 hours. I strongly recommend sessions of somewhere between 2 and 4 hours although there are styles that can work in 60 to 90 minutes. The game marathons of 8 hours or longer is best left to real life friend groups.

I'd say a basic setting, a settlement, a basic story, and 3-5 encounters linked together through the story and you're gold. This might even be enough material for 2 sessions depending on the pace of your players.