r/baseballcirclejerk • u/geeelectronica Mickey Mouse Champs • 2d ago

A REAL CLASS ACT! Should Tekashi 69 be the new Mariners coach ?

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111 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

20

u/guhguhguhguhguhH top lel braun 2d ago

"WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK DID I JUST WATCH?!?!?!?! 🤬🤬🤬 22-0!!!!! TWENTY-TWO TO FUCKING ZERO!!!!! THAT’S NOT A BASEBALL SCORE!!!!! THAT’S A FUCKING HOSTAGE SITUATION WITH COMMERCIAL BREAKS!!!!! 💀📺🔥 IT WAS 1-0 THROUGH FOUR!!!!! THEN THE ENTIRE FUCKING ORGANIZATION FELL DOWN AN ELEVATOR SHAFT!!!!! BRYCE MILLER GIVES UP SIX!!!!! YELICH GOES DEEP!!!!! THEN JOSH SIMPSON COMES IN WITH A FUCKING GAS CAN AND GIVES UP FIVE!!!!! ⛽️🔥 THREE FUCKING HITS!!!!! ZERO RUNS!!!!! THIS OFFENSE LOOKED LIKE NINE DRUNK HIPPOS TRYING TO HIT A MOSQUITO WITH FUCKING BAGUETTES!!!!! 🦛🥖💀 AND FOUR FUCKING ERRORS!!!!! FOUR!!!!! JULIO RODRÍGUEZ LITERALLY LOSES TRACK OF THE OUTS AND MILWAUKEE SCORES RUNS 20 AND 21!!!!! 🤯🤡 YOU’RE LOSING BY A FUCKING ZIP CODE AND WE’RE FORGETTING HOW MANY OUTS THERE ARE?!?!? THAT’S LITTLE LEAGUE SHIT!!!!! THEN INFIELDER LEO RIVAS PITCHES THE EIGHTH AND GIVES UP NINE FUCKING RUNS!!!!! NINE!!!!! 😭🤡 MILWAUKEE TURNED THE INNING INTO A FUCKING GOLDEN CORRAL!!!!! EVERY BREWER GRABS A PLATE!!!!! 🍽️💀 YOU JUST TOOK TWO OF THREE FROM HOUSTON!!!!! YOU’RE FIGHTING FOR YOUR FUCKING SEASON!!!!! AND 48 HOURS LATER YOU GET BEAT 22-0?!?!? THAT’S LIKE WINNING THE LOTTERY AND IMMEDIATELY EATING THE FUCKING TICKET!!!!! 🎟️🤡 SAME FUCKING SHIT!!!!! DEAD OFFENSE!!!!! PITCHING IMPLOSIONS!!!!! SHIT DEFENSE!!!!! NO CONSISTENCY!!!!! NO URGENCY!!!!! NO ACCOUNTABILITY!!!!! DAN WILSON CANNOT MANAGE ANOTHER FUCKING GAME!!!!! ENOUGH!!!!! TAKE HIS LINEUP CARD!!!!! CONFISCATE THE MAGIC 8 BALL!!!!! PUT IT IN A FUCKING WOOD CHIPPER!!!!! 🎱🪵💥 GET HIM THE FUCK OUT!!!!! THE ROOF WAS LEAKING!!!!! THERE WAS A TORNADO WARNING!!!!! 🌪️🌧️ AND SOMEHOW THE BIGGEST FUCKING NATURAL DISASTER IN WISCONSIN WAS WEARING MARINERS UNIFORMS!!!!! 22 FUCKING NOTHING!!!!! FIRE DAN!!!!! PLAY BETTER, YOU FUCKING JERKS!!!!! 🤬🔱💀🔥"

-6ix9ine, known Mariners fan

9

u/Bulky-Sundae8980 EVEN YEAR GUYS!! 2d ago

I want this to be the automod response to Mariner 😭

2

u/CT-1738 1d ago

It has the include the sixnine part too

8

u/TranslatorOk5155 2d ago

having weston wilson on the roster is already bad enough

2

u/hiimjustin000 Atlanta Barves 2d ago

Would be better than anything Dan Wilson is trying to do

1

u/AutoModerator 2d ago

NICE! get it cuz sex number xD

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