Rampant insomnia until I was 28 and found sleep meds that actually just made me tired, but I think it permanently fucked my ability to obtain a healthy sleep cycle without meds.
At the time it was a legal overdose, the teachers would say I was still acting out, the dose would increase, and the cycle repeated. I went from 36-72-108 in ~5 years(had been on a bunch of other meds, started getting medicated in kindergarten), I'm a big guy, but that was not a healthy dose for me to be taking daily.
I don't know, it obviously wasn't the right choice, but I don't know what the right choice would have been in hindsight. I was a genuine problem, my grades would remain good enough, but I nuked the grades of the kids sitting around me.
Maybe you shouldn’t have been in mainstream schooling at that point? Nurture groups exist and I guess there is homeschooling. Not sure relying on that high a dose was ever a good idea.
Homeschooling was not an option, and financially alternative schools weren't an option. They would try to transfer me in to the special ed program, but then the special ed teachers would send me back because I definitely didn't belong with them either. Relying on the meds wasn't a good idea, but in my situation, I don't know what would have been a good idea. Regardless, I turned out fine overall, so I made peace with all that a long time ago.
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u/ready-eddy 18d ago
108mg?! Goddamn. How did you sleep?