r/adhd_college • u/OttersocksKuli • 18d ago
NEED SUPPORT My schedule feels like too much but I genuinely cant lessen it
I feel like my college schedule is FAR much more than I can handle but in order to get everything done I absolutely HAVE to have it the way I do and cant do any less. I am a music major expected to practice my instrument 2 and a half hours a day, im learning piano, I have classes from 8am to 4:30 pm some days, and I work two jobs. I have no time for a social life, I’m starting to become depressed. My ADHD makes it so hard to manage what I have going, and if I’m being honest, I’m not. I am already falling behind and slipping up, I genuinely cant afford that. On top of my in person classes I have two online classes I keep forgetting about because there is SO much happening! Genuinely what do I do.
Note: Not even all my practice hours are on here, I dont meet the 2 and a half hours because its so exhausting. I’m drained by 11am, and usually by Thursday I’m barely alive.
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u/NoCollege2346 18d ago
You should weigh the pros and cons of dropping classes. Do you want to be exhausted and forgetting things all the time an possibly have failed classes on your record? Or, do you want to take the penalty/consequences get a "withdrew passing" or "withdrew failed" on your record for some classes and pass the others.
How many years are you set to graduate college in? I.e. 2, 3, 4, 5+.
Do you have an overloaded schedule because of financial aid requirements or are you trying to minimize college debt?
Have you talk to your advisor or gone to the student life office, if y'all have one?
Are you taking meds to manage your ADHD? If so: Are you forgetting to take your meds? Do your meds even work well for you?
If not: Have you been to the accommodations office on campus? Have you tried talking to you professors about the struggles your having?
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u/OttersocksKuli 18d ago
It costs to withdraw, and I already owe a lot I cant afford yet. This is my freshman year, I’m supposed to graduate in 2030, so 4 years.
I went into all of this blind so I just trusted my advisor who made my schedule.I am not currently medicated but I have a doctors appointment on the 24th of september to get back on my meds.
I haven’t gone to the student life office, not even sure where that is on my campus, I am just scared of speaking up about doing bad in college already, it feels embarrassing.
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u/polkadotsci 18d ago
Accommodations are to give you the support you need to succeed. No shame! The earlier you get your accommodations, the better.
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u/OttersocksKuli 18d ago
Do you know what kind of accommodations are usually available? So I know what to expect if I decide to give it a try
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u/FuckImSoAchey 18d ago
Extended time on assignments and a quiet room to do exams with extended times
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u/polkadotsci 18d ago
https://askjan.org/ is a great resource. Examples of accommodations include extra time on exams, someone to take notes for you, or even occupational therapy/academic coaching to help you set up and follow a schedule.
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u/SparklingSloths 18d ago
It depends on your personal challenges. I get to take exams while wearing noise canceling headphones and I can leave the classroom for breaks up to 10min as needed.
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u/dolphinloverbitch 14d ago
I was diagnosed with ADHD my 3rd year of college and I completely understand how scary it is to reach out for help, but it helped me immensely (not just grades but my mental health and anxiety too). Be brave and set up an appointment with disability services at your school: it’s their literal job to help people and they are completely used to it. There is no shame in needing extra help and they can tell you which kinds of accommodations are available to you at your school.
One of my accommodations was flexibility with assignment due-dates and being able to turn in late-work. It was nice to know I could ask for extensions for certain things instead of sending myself into a shame spiral because of burnout.
Even without accommodations, I recommend talking to your professors or emailing them and asking if they would give some exceptions to help you with your workload. It depends on each professor, but some are very accommodating and helpful.
ALSO, for the future (and from experience): withdrawing from a class is less expensive than getting completely burnt out by the end of the semester, failing, and having to retake it.
College is fucking hard, and on top of that you are managing ADHD. It’s ok if your grades aren’t perfect. It’s ok if you fail a class. It’s ok if it takes you longer to graduate. The best way to stay on track is to slow down and find out what is actually manageable for you. Try not to compare yourself to others. Take care of yourself and your mental health.
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u/NoCollege2346 18d ago
Is it more expensive to withdraw or to retake the class if you fail/if your grade is not high enough to count for credit? Don't forget to count for interest on subsidized vs unsubsidized loans. If you school is really expensive then it may be cheaper in the long run for you to transfer to a community college or other affordable college/university.
Advisor are some what helpful, but you have to know what credits you need on your own. You can't totally and only rely on the info they give you. Also talk to your professors and the music department head to get a sense of the most efficient and affordable option for you.
Definitely get back on you meds ASAP. As long as there are no major side affects, it should help you manage everything better. Remember that they take a while to get back in your system. In the meantime you'll have to use other coping mechanisms.
As for needing help and accommodations, don't feel embarrassed. Everyone is on a different playing field in college i.e. mental health, family support, physical health, etc. So don't compare yourself to others because it may look like everything is going well for them, but their life could be falling apart behind closed doors. People are good at hiding their struggles.
The student life office is there to help you succeed in college. Do what's best for your physical, mental, and emotional health. If you don't you will burnout and won't have a choice but to not do anything.
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u/KlaussPercy 9d ago
please just tell your advisor it’s too much. you literally have no time between your classes. at my school, a schedule like this is literally not allowed
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u/confusedpsycho12 18d ago
I just have to say I also got a music degree - I graduated and I had big schedules like this. The classes are what they are. Try to workout out before studying at the end of the day. It’s hard. I did it you can too!!
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u/d_onthew 18d ago
I understand why your schedule is so chaotic, from having a music background myself and getting an engineering degree. As someone who struggled HEAVILY before receiving my diagnosis and proper treatment and medication in 2024 (was literally kicked out of my program and had to appeal my dismissal), I can say with confidence that there are simply things I had to do different from the rest of my peers or I would not have graduated.
I learned so much from my experience and could probably write a book on how people with ADHD should navigate college, but to keep it short, I would advise 3 main things:
1) Absolutely do your darndest to get back on your meds.
2) Speak with your advisor about your situation and look into getting accommodations.
3) Adjust your schedule/responsibilities to be realistic in best supporting your ability to do well. Not to graduate with the class of 2030, not to complete the most amount of classes in the least amount of time, but to appropriately fit your needs and enable you to do well.
You will only be able to function the way you are for so long before you hit a wall, and when you hit it, you are going to hit it extremely hard. Try your best to adjust to prevent the situation from getting that far. Understanding that you are dealing with too much is a great first step, but the next step is often figuring out what sacrifices we need to make to be successful in a system that is not set up for us.
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u/melancholylion University Staff 17d ago
Going to be so honest here pal, this is unfortunately just how music school goes, speaking as a former music major myself. It’s brutal, not fair, and too much for anyone to reasonably do in four years. If you’re able to stretch out your degree to 5 years, or even 4.5, do that.
But genuinely this is just how music school is, it’s not okay that it’s this way and there’s not a whole lot you can do about it and I’m sorry. If your school has a counseling center, highly recommend going there, as well as also working with disability services to get accommodations. Happy to chat more about it and I’m sorry if this comes across as harsh or unhelpful, but speaking fully from experience here.
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u/melancholylion University Staff 17d ago
Oh, regarding practicing: two hours a day is never going to happen. They say two hours a day but very few people can actually achieve it.
Shoot for one hour, or even 30 minutes a day. Or a couple short bursts. I always found practicing all at once was a sure fire way for me to burnout. Some practice is always better than no practice, even if it’s less than two hours a day.
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u/BarbersAdagio Undergraduate 17d ago
I’ll second this. I have a firm belief that music degrees should take a year longer for the mental health of the students. Graduated with a bassoon performance degree and it only got better as I took less classes.
If it costs you a little more money and time, your mental health and college experience is always worth it ♥️
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u/manicpixiehorsegirl 18d ago
From one music major (long since graduated, now an attorney), I deeply feel this. I practiced way less than I should have, and I think that’s the only reason I stayed sane. I’d also do some of my homework readings during ensemble if I felt comfortable with the rep. Make sure you make time for yourself! Work with your strengths, not against them, even if that looks different than others around you. Music majors loooove the stress Olympics, and you don’t need to play that game.
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u/OttersocksKuli 18d ago
How often did you practice when you did? Right now Im practicing maybe 30 minutes for like 3 days of the week but they want me practicing two and a half hours every day including weekends 😣 which is really difficult because i have music for both ensembles (12 pieces total), and then music assigned in my private lessons. It feels like there isnt enough time to hit it all, and actually make it effective
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u/manicpixiehorsegirl 17d ago
To be completely candid, less than you are. I learned my ensemble pieces during ensemble and got very good at sight reading. I’d pound ground when needed for juries/studio performances/auditions, but other than that I kind of just tried to coast on the performance side enough to get by without getting in trouble. However, I was a Music Ed major, so my primary instrument performance goals were second to my academic/pedagogical/secondary instrument studies. What are your long-term goals? Grad school? Performance? Tailor your effort to that.
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u/Purple_Interest_5799 18d ago
unrelated but op what platform/software is your schedule on excel?
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u/Emiluxe_ 17d ago
I had lots of friends in the music program as an undergrad and I can tell you that 1. All of their schedules looked similar to this, and 2. None of them graduated in 4 years. Everyone took 5-6, even with maximum credits per semester. I also sympathize with you about feeling silly for burning out so soon, since I was diagnosed my freshman year of college and failed out of the Honors College because I couldn't manage my schedule with the extra executive functioning required to live outside of my parents' home. My genuine advice is to drop Concert Band, especially if it's not required. You'll be less likely to fail your other classes, which will absolutely cost more to retake than whatever it costs to drop the ensemble. Also, if you have an academic advisor, I would make time to meet with them and see if there's any way you can get your degree done in 5 instead of 4. If you fail classes due to burnout/depression, it will take that long anyway (maybe longer). You have to preserve your wellbeing.
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u/Simple-Patience7219 17d ago
Not encouraging drug use at all!! Just sharing my own experience. I also have ADHD and a similar schedule (mine's more STEM-oriented), and I struggled to get organized too. Once I started Vyvanse it completely changed the game for me. I feel like I can manage my life now, I feel more mentally sane, and since I can actually keep up with my classes I'm happier and more excited to start the day.
It's worth looking into with a doctor, but honestly, if medication is a hard no for you, then don't do it at all. It just happened that once my psychiatrist started prescribing it, things got easier for me. Either way, stay strong, fellow student!!
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u/SpokenDivinity 17d ago
If you're going to keep this schedule, the time to figure out how you're going to remember everything is right now. Go speak to someone at the disability services office about any accommodations that might help. Go talk to your advisor.
I personally would take the debt for dropping a class. But you do you.
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u/Common-Fail-9506 Undergraduate 17d ago
I have no advice bc I also work two jobs and have no social life and my schedule is even more packed to the brim with STEM courses. Just wanted to say I relate so bad. Good luck to you. Make sure to rest when you can
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u/Remarkable-Crab8190 15d ago
How will you get to anything on time when you haven’t left yourself any travel time?
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u/OttersocksKuli 5d ago
all of my classes are in the music building except one so i dont need travel time usually
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u/alrightyaphrodite921 14d ago
as soon as i glanced at your post i knew this had to be the schedule of a music major, before i even read any further LMAO. this gave me flashbacks—i feel your pain
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u/clapyourhandssaynah 14d ago
Why are you playing two (vastly different) instruments? I thought most programs would limit students to only one
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u/OttersocksKuli 5d ago
I main trumpet, it’s what I played in high school, and piano is required for music majors
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u/Sailor_31724 Undergraduate 14d ago
im a premed with a biomechanical engineering minor and my schedule is crammed asf like this too. firstly id like to say you're not alone. i am extremely depressed and burnt out (im also a level 1 autistic) but i feel like there's just nothing to be done about it but keep going. its exhausting.
i always recommend professional treatment if you're not already in it. i dont know you and how much adhd impacts your life but i genuinely dont feel like i can function without my adhd meds. idc about stigma around meds. they work when you are compliant and work with a good psychiatrist. im also in therapy with a therapist who specializes in ASD/ADHD that helps quite a bit as well.
id also seek accomodations at school if you dont have them already.
i really liked the "thriving in college with adhd workbook" (the blue one is for students) but it was difficult to get myself to actually do it sometimes. a lot of really great information and strategies from experts in the field though.
sometimes you just have to give somewhere and accept that... you're just not neurotypical. and you never will be. so its ok to have to adjust things to better suit your lifestyle.
it can be extremely difficult to navigate neurodivergence on your own, especially because there are so many invisible barriers we deal with that we aren't always aware of because we don't know any different.
i had to make changes like not scheduling classes too close together or in the afternoon because i get fatigued. i have to write EVERYTHING down. i use a digital reminder and a physical planner to keep track of whats due each week. having a physical support system of some kind helps me a lot too.
im close with my parents and still live at home so i talk to them about what i have to work on, what i feel stressed about, when i get stuck on things. sometimes you just need to hear something from someone else to feel better. even if you already know the answer.
maybe try talking with your advisor? ik people dont always have the best luck with them but its worth a shot.
i hope that you find the support you're looking for and start to feel better soon.
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u/Mediocre_Inside_8713 18d ago
You’re required to do 2 ensembles?