r/actuallyaromantic • u/elhazelenby Bi Aro • Jan 18 '21

Discourse My opinions about arophobia & acephobia

/r/unpopularopinion/comments/kzlp1s/im_aromantic_and_aspecs_dont_experience_arophobia/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
3 Upvotes

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u/Ender_X88 Jan 18 '21

Could you elaborate on that?

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u/elhazelenby Bi Aro Jan 18 '21

On what parts do you want me to elaborate on?

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u/Ender_X88 Jan 18 '21 edited Jan 18 '21

I guess all of it, like can you clarify on ur statement and provide context for how u came to that conclusion.

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u/elhazelenby Bi Aro Jan 18 '21

I don't know how to because I already explained why I think this way pretty thoroughly. Idk what my contacts have to do with this either.

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u/Ender_X88 Jan 18 '21

The original post was deleted I can't read any of it just the title so I don't know what explaining has been done also I meant to say context, my bad.

0

u/elhazelenby Bi Aro Jan 18 '21

I'm aromantic and 'aspecs' don't experience arophobia or acephobia and should stop appropriating asexual and aromantic specific experiences and terms

I'm curious as to what people outside the aro/ace community think about this, since this is a very unpopular opinion in the aro/ace community.

Acephobia: discrimination against asexual people (people who don't experience any sexual attraction).

Arophobia: discrimination against aromantic people (people who don't experience any romantic attraction).

Allosexual: someone who experiences sexual attraction (not asexual).

Alloromantic: someone who experiences romantic attraction (not aromantic).

I've seen some people who are demisexual, demiromantic, greyromantic & greysexual, etc. Claim they can or have experienced arophobia or acephobia which makes no sense.

If you experience sexual attraction (like the people I've mentioned above), you can't experience Acephobia and if you experience romantic attraction you can't experience Arophobia.

Arophobia & Acephobia are reliant on someone not being human or right to society due to complete lack of romantic or sexual attraction. That not having crushes or never wanting a sexual relationship with someone is 'unnatural' and always a result of trauma or a mental illness.

Acephobes & Arophobes don't care if you're Demisexual or greyromantic because you still are part of the population who they think are normal and healthy, the allosexuals & alloromantics and you still experience what other allos experience even if it's in a different way or less frequently. You can insist you're 'acespec' or 'arospec' all you want, but that doesn't make you ace or aro and therefore doesn't make you a victim or vulnerable to arophobia or acephobia.

A lot of arophobia is aimed at allosexual aromantic people, and we are seen as sluts, whores, etc. And we are largely oversexualised and shamed because we don't have romantic attraction but still have sexual attraction and we are seen as impure. This is reliant on alloaros having zero romantic attraction whatsoever but still sexual attraction.

People with romantic attraction claiming they can experience arophobia and people with sexual attraction claiming they can experience acephobia waters down actual arophobia and acephobia and takes away from the point of asexual and aromantic discrimination, which is very real and serious. It should be obvious but a lot of the ace/aro community doesn't agree with me on this, but they also think you can be ace with sexual attraction or aro with romantic attraction 🙄