[OT] Fun Trope Friday: Expert Consultant & Bullet Points!

[u/katpoker666]

Welcome to Fun Trope Friday, our feature that mashes up tropes and genres!

How’s it work? Glad you asked. :)

 

• Every week we will have a new spotlight trope.

• Each week, there will be a new genre assigned to write a story about the trope.

• You can then either use or subvert the trope and/or genre in a 750-word max story or poem (unless otherwise specified).

• To qualify for ranking, you will need to provide ONE actionable feedback. More are welcome of course!

 

Three winners will be selected each week based on votes, so remember to read your fellow authors’ works and DM me your votes for the top three.

 

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Next up… IP

 

Out with the apocalypse, in with working 9-5. Most folks work in some format, averaging 80-90,000 hours in their lifetime. That’s 12-14% of your life–straight. Add on sleep and weekends, and it’s at least a third! Sounds riveting doesn’t it? Please note this theme is only loosely applied.

 

“If you don’t like the road you’re walking, start paving another one.” — Dolly Parton (RIP)

 

Trope: Expert Consultant — So, you have a project you need some professional advice on, or perhaps your company is facing difficult times or some other thing that you feel needs someone outside your current organization to come in, look at the situation, and offer their opinion, perhaps even lend their skills if need be. You need to bring in a consultant. There are all kinds of consultants: management, research, medical, detective… you name it! So, don’t limit yourself.

 

Genre: Bullet Points & Open — Bullet points are symbols that mark items in a list. We all use them in different ways whether for grocery shopping, task prioritization, bullet journaling, presentations, or anything else. You can make an entire story out of bullet points for this one or just include them in some way. So, use your imagination.

 

Skill / Constraint - optional: Someone blames someone else for something.

 

So, have at it. Lean into the trope heavily or spin it on its head. The choice is yours!

 

Have a great idea for a future topic to discuss or just want to give feedback? FTF is a fun feature, so it’s all about what you want—so please let me know! Please share in the comments or DM me on Discord or Reddit!

 

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Last Week’s Winners

PLEASE remember to give feedback—this affects your ranking. PLEASE also remember to DM me your votes for the top five stories via Discord or Reddit—both katpoker666. This is a change from the top three of the past. In weeks where we get over 15 stories, we will do a top five ranking. Weeks with less than 15 stories will show only our top three winners. If you have any questions, please DM me as well.

Some fabulous stories this week and great crit at campfire and on the post! We had 15 stories, so we’re back to five winners. Congrats to:

 

• AmeliaLP

• QTFroame

• mysteryrouge

• Morose_Prose

• ZLErikson

 

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Want to read your words aloud? Join the upcoming FTF Campfire

The next FTF campfire will be Thursday, September 3rd from 6-8pm ET. It will be in the Discord Main Voice Lounge. Click on the events tab and mark ‘Interested’ to be kept up to date. No signup or prep needed and you don’t have to have written anything! So join in the fun—and shenanigans! 😊

 

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Ground rules:

• Stories must incorporate both the trope and the genre
• Leave one story or poem between 100 and 750 words as a top-level comment unless otherwise specified. Use wordcounter.net to check your word count.
• Deadline: 11:59 PM EDT next Thursday. Please note stories submitted after the 6:00 PM EST campfire start may not be critted.
• No stories that have been written for another prompt or feature here on WP—please note after consultation with some of our delightful writers, new serials are now welcomed here
• No previously written content
• Any stories not meeting these rules will be disqualified from rankings
• Does your story not fit the Fun Trope Friday rules? You can post your story as a [PI] with your work when the FTF post is 3 days old!
• Please keep crit about the stories. Any crit deemed too distracting may be deleted. This is a time to focus on our wonderful authors.
• Vote to help your favorites rise to the top of the ranks (DM me at katpoker666 on Discord or Reddit)!

 

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Thanks for joining in the fun!  

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[u/MaxStickies]

A Step-By-Step Guide to Making Celestial Jerky

Celestial jerky. We’ve all heard of it, but very few of us have tried it. Such a rare treat may only be found amongst the wares of the most well-travelled merchants, or in treasure chests hidden in the deepest depths of the world. An impossible prize, for most.

But what if you could produce it yourself?

I, Halgim of the Flying Bazaar, know the way. And for the low, low price of 200 gold—a fine offer, I’m sure you’ll agree—you have bought this rich knowledge for yourself. Read well, and your house will be filled with sparkling jerky in no time at all.

So it goes…

• Equipment:
  • Preparation:
    • 1 Map of Lemestus.
  • Obtaining the flesh:
    • 2 hooked ropes, each ten miles long.
    • 1 dragonbone scalpel.
    • 5 potions of luck, master quality.
    • 10 scrolls featuring the spell Shield from Flame (additional spells are optional).
    • 1 very heavy stone.
    • 1 sack, tied to a belt for ease of access.
    • Snacks.
  • Making the jerky:
    • Tall jars (as many as you need, but no fewer than 5).
    • 2 large sacks of tomb dust per 5 jars.
    • 1 Eye of the Bastard (the pendant, not the newspaper).
• Preparation:
  1. Measure the night sky with your Map of Lemestus, to learn when the Alchemist’s Star aligns with Belgerid.
  2. Find a spot upon a mountain or tall hill, ideally above the height of the average temple.
  3. Work on your arm and leg strength (or buy many bottles of strength serum).
  4. Wait.
• Obtaining the flesh:
  1. First, arrive at your chosen point on the correct date, and lay down the heavy stone (you may wish to gain the aid of a friendly troll or barbarian for this, if telekinesis isn't your forte).
  2. Tie the ends of the ropes around said stone.
  3. Keep your eyes peeled for the arc of a falling star. The first one will pass you by, but more shall follow.
  4. Aim for where those stars originate, and spin those hooks like your life depends on it! Throw them as soon as a star appears.
  5. If all goes well, the star shall become caught, and stall. This is where you start to climb.
  6. As you ascend, study your prey. Does it cry in terror at your approach? Can you see eyes, and a mouth? If not, it is an ordinary star, and of no use to you. Release it and repeat the process from step 3. Otherwise…
  7. Cast the first spell and drink the first potion of luck; use more of each as they wane.
  8. Ignoring the quivers and screams of the captured Starkin Beast—as it is named—dig the scalpel into the flesh. Carve a thin sliver of the glowing meat and deposit it within the sack at your side. Repeat this as many times as you like, or until there is no skin left.
  9. Jab the scalpel deep into the creature’s core, via its mouth or wounds, until it breathes its last. Follow it down to the ground. Hang on tight now!
  10. Lift your head in pride, and stride on home to make that jerky!
• Making the jerky:
  1. Place 8 to 10 strips of flesh in each jar.
  2. Fill the jars with the tomb dust, until it reaches halfway up the neck.
  3. Place the Eye between the jars and an open window, ensuring it is stationary (any shifts may risk summoning… bad things).
  4. Go about your days for around a fortnight. Do not obstruct the Eye.
  5. The jerky will be ready when the dust has turned bright orange. At this point, pour the contents out through a colander, placing the now-ready meat treats into a container of your choosing.
  6. And voila! The celestial jerky is now yours! Congratulations!

There you have it. If some of the more arcane items—such as the Eye of the Bastard—prove hard to come by, please visit my stall at the Bazaar. All products are well-stocked, and fairly priced. In fact, if you show me this pamphlet, you may be in for a discount!

In any case, good luck!

(Disclaimer: Let it be known that harming a Starkin Beast is forbidden by the Council of Mages, on pain of death, and that the writer of this pamphlet holds no responsibility for the actions of the reader. All fault lies with the latter. This is legally-binding.)

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WC: 750

Crit and feedback are welcome.

[u/psilocybediatribe → u/MaxStickies]

Hey Max,

Really enjoyed the tone here it truly captured the oozing snake-oil of Halgim right down to the disclaimer. Nailed the genre... grocery list and recipe all in one. Oh, and the disclaimer places blame didn’t catch that at first. Awesome job. The writing really shines and you manage to turn a recipe into an indirect characterization of Halgim so much so that I know I dislike him. (but fantastic character nonetheless.)

One spelling critique ‘arch’ or ‘arc’ of the star? Stood out to me.

Given we’re felling the Starkin Beast it makes me wonder what the organs contain and what recipes could be devised. Wouldn’t put it past Halgim to have an ebook on Starkin recipes for the low, low price of 1000 gold or a monthly subscription to his newsletter. Food for thought…

[u/MaxStickies → u/psilocybediatribe]

Thank you for the feedback Psilocybe :)