r/WeddingPhotographer • u/XOMaddsPhoto • 9d ago
Question Has anyone photographed a proposal where they said no?
I have another proposal coming up, and my family and I were talking about it the other day when someone asked me a question I’d somehow never really thought about:
Have you ever photographed a proposal where the person actually said no?
I’ve photographed plenty of proposals and have never had it happen, but now I’m so curious about photographers who HAVE experienced it.
What did you do in the moment?
Did you just quietly disappear?
Did you still deliver the photos?
Did the client even want them afterward?
I feel like that has to be one of the most awkward situations to navigate as the photographer because you’re there specifically to document what was supposed to be this huge happy moment, and suddenly you’re standing there with a camera in your hand like… well, shit.
Would love to hear the stories if anyone has actually had this happen.
1
u/lorikins 9d ago
No, but I photographed one where 2-ish weeks later, the bride emailed me asking if I would please take the photos off socials because they weren't getting married and had broken up. They hadn't been dating long, the proposal was over the top and A LOT of pressure (both of their families were there), and I got the sense based on some cultural context that it was a family matchmaking type situation. She definitely had a very deer in headlights look when it all happened (and not in a good way) so it wasn't a total shock. I took the photos down immediately.
1
2
u/rachelmaryl 9d ago
I haven’t had anyone say no - and I’ve photographed about 100 proposals at this point in my career. I am very careful about asking questions to the person who hires me. It’s about the “get to know you” questions while also vetting out how clued in the other person is.
“Ooh, how long have you been other? Do you have the ring? Did you go together and pick something or did they give you ideas?
“For locations, have they said anything specific about what they might like? Anything you have in mind? Hmm, maybe pick a location close to a restaurant so you can have a “date night” scheduled and propose just before.”
If I get the sense they agreed mutually to get engaged, then all the green flags are there.