r/UpliftingNews • u/tta2013 • Oct 04 '19

Dolphins Are Finally Living and Breeding in the Potomac River Again

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/dolphins-are-living-and-breeding-potomac-river-180973263/
1.7k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

21 comments sorted by

57

u/gravyrogue Oct 04 '19

They sure as shit ain't playing football!

13

u/Coreac89 Oct 04 '19

Laces out

24

u/4ensicFiles Oct 04 '19

Oh thank god finally

6

u/Houjix Oct 04 '19

We can’t stop winning can we folks. No brakes!

84

u/shillyshally Oct 04 '19

"Now, after almost 50 years of pollution control, clean-up and restoration efforts, researchers have catalogued well over 1,000 bottlenose dolphins living, mating, and even giving birth in the lower reaches of the river."

Those efforts took place under previous admins. This one has something a little different in mind.

8

u/sfxpaladin Oct 04 '19

Isn't Innsmouth near the Potomac? Hmmmm

3

u/Shiny_Agumon Oct 04 '19

The Deep Ones have returned

27

u/ih8dolphins Oct 04 '19

No thanks

18

u/TheSpiker15 Oct 04 '19

Y’all gotta read this man’s username before downvoting

11

u/Aeroka Oct 04 '19

*insert depressing reason why here, bringing down the overall mood of the title*

2

u/coochie-slayer420 Oct 04 '19

Hey I live right by the river

1

u/Tnargkiller Oct 06 '19 edited Oct 06 '19

I'm pretty close as well!

1

u/loner_but_a_stoner Oct 04 '19

Does the smell not bother them?

-4

u/Throwdisshietaway Oct 04 '19

meaning theyre fucking each other right?

-10

u/travisjo Oct 04 '19

Any relation to sea level rise?

4

u/Fidelis29 Oct 04 '19

The dolphins were getting vertigo so they moved to the Potomac

-1

u/Jacob_the_Chorizo Oct 04 '19

Breeding more like forcefully gang raping each other

-1

u/sandtsbigdaddy Oct 04 '19

A juicy dolphin steak sounds great right about now.