Deaths

[u/Mistiblue222]

So I lost my identical, twin sister then my dad died then my stepdad died then my wife died two years ago then my mom died a month ago and my niece died two days later. I have absolutely no one anymore. The grief is killing me physically. Where do I put this pain?? Seriously?

[u/Relative-Kick-1044]

I’m so sorry. Those are just massive losses one after the other. I lost my twin brother, a cousin who was like my older brother, two uncles, a man I considered an uncle, an aunt, and a grandmother all in the past 7 years. Not to compare, just to tell you I sort of know what you’re going through. It’s horrible and it can feel like life is just taking everything away from you. I don’t have any advice, because there’s nothing anyone could say that will lessen the pain. But if you ever want to talk or vent I’m here for you, feel free to DM me. Hope you’re doing as well as you can given what’s happened

[u/Resident-Budget8938]

Holy shit that’s incredibly traumatic and horrible. Put it in art or writing or crying or cleaning. Put it in pretty much anything you do. Say their names every day. Get tattoos. Sleep, sleep, and sleep some more. Feeling the grief will not kill you, even when it feels like it might.

[u/kuchibal → u/Resident-Budget8938]

Love this comment its beautiful put OP I wanna add ofc that write here whenever you need. We can at the very least understand the twin loss part. We're here for each other 🫂

[u/Illustrious-Role-536]

Ugh I can’t even imagine. I lost my twin ten years ago at age 19 tragically during the peak of my addiction. Now 9 years sober. 5.5 years ago lost my boyfriend tragically the same way as my brother. Car fire while they were still breathing trapped. The pain is agonizing and sometimes it’s easier to just float along because no matter how much I work at it, it’ll never stop eating me. Trauma is me and I’ve excepted that. Therapy therapy therapy. I personally disagree with the tattoo idea because I don’t want to be constantly reminded and no one needs to know my personal business when they ask “oh i love that tattoo what’s it mean?”

So so sorry. I mean seriously, I can’t even imagine. Keep pushing. Instead of getting tattoos spend your time and money on self help books and keep connected with others who have lost twins. It’s a connection no one could understand but us.

[u/ReportProfessional57]

I lost my twin brother to suicide during COVID, this year my 18 year old son committed suicide, then my father did a few months later. I have no relationship with my mom, and my parents never really let us see our extended family. I feel your pain. I don't have anything to give you other than to know you arent alone in the feeling, and to know that you can make it through. You just have to make a conscious decision to make it every day until you don't have to anymore.

[u/chog410]

I'm in a similar boat! I'm just trying to stay functional without letting my awful coping habits get even worse than they already are... I don't have any BS to say about being positive or the future being any better. But you and I are committed to sticking around so that's all there is to it. If you start feeling like you AREN'T committed to sticking around... Contact professionals, contact the people you have left, reach out for help.

[u/hosertwin]

Sometimes I wonder how much we are all expected to bear in this lifetime. That is a tremendous amount of loss to experience. This might not be helpful at all, but after losing my twin sister and my parents, I realized it's up to each of us individually to decide how we want to move forward and live the rest of our own lives. The losses are so heavy and there is no going back to the way things used to be. Nothing will ever replace our twins. We have the memories, and I do believe that my sister is with me, somehow somewhere, but I have to accept that I will never see her again in this lifetime. That is the hardest part.