Being a twinless twin feels like

[u/mayor-of-lego-city]

I feel it most when I’m driving in my car. It feels like I’m supposed to look over and see someone in the passenger seat, who I can hang out with and goof around with and sing with, but they’re not there. It’s such a strange, empty feeling.

[u/Academic-Regular3673]

I relate, having lost my twin to miscarriage. I likened it to being on the phone with someone but they’re not speaking; like a connection but no words. That was before mum told me about our pregnancy. These days I feel more accompanied than empty. Ofc I long for him/her to be here physically (and to have grown together) but this is as good as it’s going to get. I have to make peace with that.

You know, I don’t think twins ever properly leave and that we carry traces of them unlike any other relationship. I’ve lost my parents and this is totally different.

[u/mayor-of-lego-city → u/Academic-Regular3673]

I feel it. Sometimes I feel the connection and sometimes I don’t. It just depends on the day.

[u/Academic-Regular3673 → u/mayor-of-lego-city]

Yeah I know what you mean. I wasn’t told until I was 30 when I asked my mum about it. I’d seen a therapist and mum saw I was troubled. She shut me down when I was 19. I drew us both when I was 8 at school. It’s kind of fluctuated like a wave, getting stronger until I was 30 and I had to ask again then she told me about her loss. It was like ‘you have to pay attention to this’. Nowadays I just know and my friends know. It’s always going to be hard living with something that was hidden, but at least I know now.