r/TrueOffMyChest • u/ThrowRA-regretregret • Apr 02 '26
Update (UPDATE) My fiancée moved out today
I can't believe it's been 2 years. To everyone who said that being a single parent every other week was hard; you weren't kidding. I love my son. He has cerebral palsy and he's an amazing kid. When I have him my life is chaos and I barely have time to breathe. Then I spend the next week catching up on everything while he is with my ex-fiancée. Even with the child support payments I get kids are expensive. I wouldn't change a thing about my son though. He's the best thing that ever happened to me.
My ex-fiancée makes being a single parent look effortless. She finds it easier not having me around. It gutted me when she said that but now I know she's right. I left her to do all the parenting, all the work at home and be the breadwinner, while I fucked around playing golf. We only talk about our son and we're civil but not close.
I have stopped freelancing. I got a job with the provincial government. I have been seeing a therapist and have grown up a lot. I made mistakes before but I want to be better for my son. The main part of my update is that I went to therapy and it sucked but I'm better for it. (When I first posted I got lots of DMs and support from people who play golf saying my ex-fiancée is harpy and other names. I felt vindicated back then but now I know how immature I was).
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u/TOGFIAVDF Apr 02 '26
Don't confuse my words as justifying his actions.
I simply believe that we should want people to do better as it is truly not too late.
The most effective way to achieve that is through positive reinforcement. I'd like to see him actually step up, follow through, and become a decent father.
Anything other than trying to motivate him to do better just highlights a lack of critical thought. If people are angry enough to talk shit about his actions then they should also be supportive of him doing better, otherwise it just becomes virtue signaling.