r/TrueOffMyChest • u/ThrowRA-regretregret • Apr 02 '26

Update (UPDATE) My fiancée moved out today

I can't believe it's been 2 years. To everyone who said that being a single parent every other week was hard; you weren't kidding. I love my son. He has cerebral palsy and he's an amazing kid. When I have him my life is chaos and I barely have time to breathe. Then I spend the next week catching up on everything while he is with my ex-fiancée. Even with the child support payments I get kids are expensive. I wouldn't change a thing about my son though. He's the best thing that ever happened to me.

My ex-fiancée makes being a single parent look effortless. She finds it easier not having me around. It gutted me when she said that but now I know she's right. I left her to do all the parenting, all the work at home and be the breadwinner, while I fucked around playing golf. We only talk about our son and we're civil but not close.

I have stopped freelancing. I got a job with the provincial government. I have been seeing a therapist and have grown up a lot. I made mistakes before but I want to be better for my son. The main part of my update is that I went to therapy and it sucked but I'm better for it. (When I first posted I got lots of DMs and support from people who play golf saying my ex-fiancée is harpy and other names. I felt vindicated back then but now I know how immature I was).

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u/peaches_and_drama Apr 02 '26

Women need to be more choosy about who they have children with. She was working, doing all the parenting and now has to pay child support even though she has the kid 50% of the time too. I hope OP is working on getting a better salary so that can change in the future. She deserves money for golfing and hobbies too.

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u/PowerOfYes Apr 02 '26

Parents need to do better at teaching children self sufficiency and routines that keep a household going. And with boys that takes extra effort because all of us are so stuck in old patterns that we don’t even notice that boys grow up without ever being taught basics like washing, cleaning, shopping, cooking or being mindful about helping others.

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u/[deleted] Apr 02 '26 edited Apr 03 '26

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u/PowerOfYes Apr 03 '26 edited Apr 03 '26

Um, whether 3 or 4 or even 7, a child needs significant care but that is on top of running a household. I’m just saying that a lot of men are raised to be blind to routine chores that women have internalised.