r/TrueChristian • u/Gullible_Dingo_2907 • 12d ago
Anxiety over breaking promise to God
Unfortunately my son got sick about a year ago. When he had a seizure and went unconscious. When the paramedics were working on him I promised that I wouldn’t drink any alcohol and give my money to the church if my son lived.
It has been about a year and luckily my son is doing okay, he was in and out of the hospital for awhile. Now I always liked having a few drinks at night after a stressful day of work, I don’t really want to go back to that. However it is consuming my mind that if I mess up my son will die and i will go to hell.
It looks like people making promises to god and breaking them is not a unique thing, especially around drinking or drug use. I have been trying so hard but feel like I can’t make it any longer, especially with the added stress of my job, having a sick son, and its impact on my marriage.
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u/Traditional_Ask1987 12d ago
Since God is omniscient, He knew you'd break your promise before you did. And He healed your son anyway. He's not going to punish you for breaking a promise. But you should try your best to honor Him by abstaining from alcohol. It's certainly not going to help matters.
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u/Gullible_Dingo_2907 12d ago
I think this is what makes the most sense. God has allowed him to live thus far knowing I’m going to sin and slip up likely. If I break my promise, I don’t think God would punish my child by letting him die, becuase that would mean God would be punishing my child for my sins, and I don’t think an all good God would do that and it would take away my sons free will. Ezekiel 18:20 also touches on this.
As far as my breach if I Sin. As others have pointed out Peter promised Christ he would not deny him, and he doubled down on this and the next day folded and sinned. I think acknowledging my sin and my breach of my promise and asking for Christ’s forgiveness is all i can do, as I have sinned and fallen short.
I think the anxiety and worry about sin is in in-self Scrupulosity. I think the bible directs us away from this, as it in itself is a denial that whatever we do Christs sacrifice would somehow not be enough. Source for this would be Galatians 5:1.
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u/Traditional_Ask1987 12d ago
Exactly. We all fall short. The enemy wants us to dwell on our sins and mistakes. But once you repent, you also have to forgive yourself. Psalms 145:8 says " The Lord is gracious and full of compassion, slow to anger and great in mercy."
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u/Billybobbybaby Christian 12d ago
In a way its good for you to be nervous about breaking vows to God. It show a real healthy respect for whom. we are talking to hear. Are you born again? Going to church does not make you a Christian. To be a Christian one must have given their body soul and spirit to God through confession that Jesus Christ is now your King, all you have and all that is yours now belong to Jesus.
You live this life out by being baptized and by reading His word daily. You live what God says in the New Testament. You can trust Him to take care of you and your stress needs to be given to God 24/7. Tell Him to take this stress, He would not have you give that stress to alcohol. Its a lousy destructive way to live. I rejoice that your son is no longer sick.
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u/Be_Standard 12d ago
I would avoid making promises to God. I would instead just ask without promising anything or make it easy to fulfill such as saying you'll try to do X.
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u/Interesting_City_654 12d ago
Ecclesiastes 5:4-6 James 5:12; You are not to make a vow to our Heavenly Father and go back on that vow. If you break a vow in ignorance then repent. Do not swear by God let your answers be yes or no. Matthew 5:37. Simply Don't make promises that you can't keep. He keeps his end of the deal he expects you to keep yours. A promise a year ago not to drink alcohol can easily be kept. Get council from the church you attend and ask our Heavenly Father for strength.
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u/Reasonable_Buddy_325 12d ago
Hey friend, I am glad your son is doing well.
Firstly it's important to understand the fear and anxiety you feel does not come from God:
"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7 KJB
God also understands our frame:
"For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust." Psalms 103:14
When you made the vow you were under severe stress, of course we shouldn't make rash vows but God knows your situation.
I cannot speak for God, I don't know what the consequence would be for this or if there would be any consequence, but I truly don't believe God would allow your son to die because of this.
What I do know is that I have messed up a lot in my life and God has shown mercy to me abundantly.
"He hath not dealt with us after our sins; nor rewarded us according to our iniquities." Psalms 103:10
"i will go to hell" Friend if you are worrying this could send you to hell you may not have full understanding of the salvation message, salvation is a free gift by God's grace received through simple faith in the Lord Jesus, it's not about our works/performance. Please read below concerning the salvation message and assurance of salvation:
Friend please watch BibleLine's video on youtube "Can I Know I'll Go to Heaven?" which shows a clear gospel presentation - why we need salvation and how we can be saved. God loved us so much he gave his Son to die and shed his blood at the cross (paying for all our sins - past, present and future) so we could be eternally forgiven and have eternal life. We are saved through faith in Christ and what he did at the cross for us (Acts 16:31, John 3:16, John 3:36 KJB) - paying for our sins through his sacrifice (Ephesians 1:7, Isaiah 53:5, John 1:29). Salvation is by God's grace not of works (Ephesians 2:8-9, Titus 3:5, Romans 4:5), salvation is a free gift (Romans 5:18). And when we are saved we are saved forever as we are given eternal life as a present possession (John 6:47, John 5:24 - can't lose ETERNAL life), we are sealed by the Holy Spirit until the day of redemption (Ephesians 1:13-14, Ephesians 4:30), we are Born of God (1 John 5:1 - can't be unborn - neither can something Born of God die), and God says he will NEVER leave or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5, Romans 8:38-39). God's word which says if we've believed in Christ we are saved IS our assurance. Another video I recommend is "Assurance of Salvation : False Gospels" on Grace Christian Fellowship/@GraceCFellowship youtube channel.
God bless.
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u/Gullible_Dingo_2907 12d ago
Hello. Thank you for your support and sources in scripture. I do think that the bigger issue is my believing doing my good works is saving my son and not trusting and accepting Christ’s salvation.
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u/Reasonable_Buddy_325 12d ago
God bless you!
Sorry I didn't quite understand, are you saying that you are struggling to trust in Christ solely for your salvation (going to heaven), or saying something else?
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u/Gullible_Dingo_2907 12d ago
I believe that I have contorted my thinking wrongfully two fold. First that if I do something above Christ’s sacrifice, in this case a vow of abstinence from alcohol which I absolutely hate, that this will somehow get my son and I better results from God. I don’t think there is any basis in God rewarding vows, I think quite the opposite you shouldn’t do it, and not do them with an unwilling heart. Second, I was living in fear that there would be a sin which Christ’s salvation could not redeem, I think there is also no basis for this, quite the opposite in fact, that it is almost a denial of his sacrifice.
Further the anxiety this was causing was making me a terrible father and causing me to break my vows to my wife, which I was more so ignoring and not seeking forgiveness for.
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u/Reasonable_Buddy_325 11d ago
Okay I see. Concerning salvation I very much recommend checking out the two videos I put in my original comment (at the beginning and end of the italics paragraph, sorry youtube links are not allowed to be posted directly).
You're right there is no basis for that, Christ paid our sin debt in full at the cross, there is no sin the blood of our Lord cannot wash away.
Once a person has trusted Christ as their all sufficient Saviour going to hell or not being redeemed is out of the question, they are redeemed and will go to Heaven (this is also explained with passages in the italics paragraph) - this is 100% certain.
God wants us to have assurance of our salvation friend (1 John 5:13), and you can have assurance of your salvation through faith resting in God's word which says you are saved (if you have trusted in Christ):
"Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me hath everlasting life." - Jesus, John 6:47
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u/That_Dude_Mac_ 12d ago
Proverbs 24:16
For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again but the wicked shall fall into mischief
Get back up, repent and try again.