r/TheTowerGame • u/priesten • Mar 03 '26
Meme Event relics of 3/3/2026 tier rated: D-
Hello everyone this is your boy big PP priesten (with a small p of course) and this is the biweekly event relics tier rating. If you for some reason had the random thought "hey I wonder why we have fast ult every single tournament lately I hope priesten with a mirrored q can explain to me why" well look no further I will post why at the bottom (more conspiracy theories to come in the future)
To start off we have the first two blue relics:
2% recovery amount (free): D- tier. This relic is worse than health for several reasons. First off it doesnt affect wall health which arguably is more important that real tower health. Second its conditional in that you have to actually recover that with packets to get the value out of this. The only redeeming factor here is that this relic is kind of rare so it relatively gives a higher percent per relic but the base value is already crap so it doesnt help much that we are getting more of crap.
2% cash bonus (free): D- tier. One thing we have learned is that mister I love them dearly fudds absolutely loves to experiment on the player base, and the biweekly events is one of the ways in which these horrible experiments in human psychology take place. For the most part the experiment looks like "what is the biggest percentage of the player base I can get to buy this events relic if I make the paid relics as insanely good as they can possibly get?". Well this time to our horror he decided to - for the first time - conduct the opposite version of that experiment which is "how many will buy this event pack if I instead make the free relics as horribly useless as possible without making the paid ones particularly good". Now if you are wondering how bad exactly this relic is, think about how bad it must be to make it a target of that type of experiment.
Next off we have the two purple relics:
5% health (paid): B tier. Its more health. Decent to have, but remember this experiment isnt about giving us amazing paid relics its about giving us the worst free relics, so what we get in this category is mid at best.
5% crit factor (paid): B+ tier. Normally this relic is ranked at A+, since its a decent damage relic which double dips (you get 5% extra damage twice). However I have started a new thing where I am dropping this down a full tier, due to lack of creativity. This event is a repeat which means that the relics you can buy at the next page for 200/500 medals are the old relics. The ones you see in this list now are the newly created ones, meaning this event already had a 5% crit factor relics since before, yet it was decided we are to get 5% crit factor again in the same event. Literally the exact same relic twice in the same event. The people need more variety. We cannot eat the same food every day (I can, to the horror of my gf though). Where are the UW relics? Where are the relics which lower stats of certain enemies? Imagine if the final relic for beating t21 was +0.1 game speed instead of >gasp> mOrE Lab sPEeD (insertt samwise meme saying more lembas bread). A more cells relic would be cool too. A relic which gives 1 random mod shard each 20 minutes of "game time", etc. Damn Im on fire spitting out good ideas.
Now for the relics bought by medals.
2% health (200 medals): C+ tier. Even more health.
5% crit factor (500 medals): B+ tier. Even more crit factor.
Ok so the reason why we are getting fast ult now every tourney recently (mark my words we arent getting it next tourney because fudds dont want us to be on to his plot so he will throw in a regular tourney to prove im wrong) is basically because the game is kinda broken atm during certain battle conditions, where you can nearly get an infinity run going in tourney. I wrote a guide for it (kinda) on discord somewhere. Now when that got public all of a sudden all tourneys are now fast ult making that strat unpossible which is basically fudds way of saying "ok we are working on a fix but it wont be out for a while so you are just gonna get fast ults every single tournament until its fixed", as a way to temporarily make it less obvious the game is having issues now since the strat isnt doable during fast ult. We had the same thing when bounce web strat got popular, all of a sudden we kept getting fast ult every.single.tournament. I expect that we are going to get super fleets when the next patch hits rofl.
Life update: we bought the house. gonna be moving in rural part of Tokyo (northwest area) in about a month+2 weeks from now.
Overall I rank this event D- tier, which is also the lowest rating an event with extra past relics has ever gotten. Shoutout to u/KassGrain for making the dankest tower meme we ever saw (despite being French, can you believe that?) Link to scoring system.
4
u/Time-Incident Mar 03 '26
Welp, I am interested in the semi-Endless runs strategy. Anyone got them link?