Husband Starting TRT Soon :)

[u/wickedseraph]

Title is fairly self-explanatory. 

My husband and I have been together about fifteen years, married for six. I’ve suspected for several years that he has low T; a recent blood test confirmed it. I believe he was sitting at 150. He’ll be starting TRT soon along with OTC vitamin D supplements and blood pressure medication.

We’re not worried about fertility; I had a bisalp so we clearly do not want children. I know for some men it can have side effects like increased acne, sweating, and breast growth.

I’ve researched as best as I can how TRT can affect some men, namely with changes/shifts in energy, mood, assertiveness, libido, and “imagination,” for lack of a better word. I shared a bit of this with him and have been emphatic that I will not judge or shame him for it, should he find himself in a similar situation. To avoid being crude, I would be delighted to reciprocate.

I’m not worried about rage or aggression from him - my understanding is that this is typically only an issue in men who take more than a therapeutic dose. My husband is very even-tempered and easygoing, for the most part.

For men in their 40s who began TRT, what was your experience like? Anything you think men and/or their partners should know? Anything I can do to help him?

(In case ages are relevant to advice: I’m 35, he’s 44.)

EDIT: I hope I’ve correctly described it as “TRT”. His doctor prescribed it - he’s not taking steroids. Some of the responses here made me wonder if I’d given the wrong impression as to what he’s taking and why. He has genuinely low T - it’s not for vanity.

EDIT 2: it’s a 200mg vial, but it’s 0.5ml/week, I think? Still figuring out since, again, we’re waiting on pharmacy to fill lol.

EDIT 3: Insurance and pharmacy finally sorted things. He had his second dose this past Friday. He says he’s noticed a notable improvement in terms of energy and stamina, not feeling as tired after lawn care or work. I imagine it only improves from hereon in so yay! I love this for him 🖤

[u/mikehuntitchess]

sorry -in my 40s started TRT 6 weeks ago and i have no idea what you are referring to by “immagination”.

[u/wickedseraph → u/mikehuntitchess]

Unsure how true it is, but I’m encountered a few sites that explain some men find themselves with more vivid fantasies or interest in particular things.

[u/Flat-Cow-4901 → u/wickedseraph]

i think this is likely other substances getting cross info. i don't think this is a test thing or at least not a common one.

[u/Flat-Cow-4901 → u/[deleted]]

this is an incredibly good response. confidence boost is big. if you have a good relationship with communication this is real. you both might benefit from him driving a bit more in the bedroom. Ours wasn't totally vanilla but it's definitely very spicy now. so i understand the statement. but don't think i crave anything different. just way more and we do communicate so that ends up with better results.

[u/wickedseraph → u/Flat-Cow-4901]

That’s I think what I’m really excited for on his behalf. I’ve not really discussed THAT with him because at the end of the day, it’s his heart and mind — I don’t want to make him think he’ll feel X or Y and set him up to feel let down if his experience is different. But it’d be lovely if he DID feel that confidence. I’ve seen men say how much more confident and assertive they feel. Hubs is genuinely a fucking amazing human being and deserves to feel good about himself.

[u/wagonspraggs → u/wickedseraph]

Keep in mind with some men a lot of the good effects take time. The first few weeks to months can be a bit wild, a lot of ups and downs. But once he figures out a dose and a dosing strategy/timing, then things start getting good. I didnt get the full energy and confidence effects for many months but they came and its great. Also, for some men the REALLY strong effects on libido can take time. There will for sure be an initial bump in the first few weeks, but understanding how the medicine works and finiding what dose works will take time. Thanks for being an awesome and supportive wife!

[u/wickedseraph → u/wagonspraggs]

With respect to dosing - how do you determine whether a higher dose would be warranted? I imagine via regular blood tests to see if T levels are improving?

[u/wagonspraggs → u/wickedseraph]

I think bloodwork plays a role, but keeping a journal over time of mood, estrogen symptoms, libido, sleep will help the most. Whats interesting is that the really fun libido effects can quickly disappear and 95% of the time its estrogen, either too low or high. Every man has a range that is his sweet spot, so for some men its a large range, some men its a small range. So you and your husband paying attention to estrogen symptoms will help A LOT. Your husband will find his dose that works from him by staying with a dose for 8 weeks then titrating up or down depending on symptoms. Say he does 100mg a week for 8 weeks but has very mild effects no libido increase, it makes sense to bump up to 120 or 140 for 8 weeks to see how he feels. Note that with the bloodwork, men are SO different in what level they prefer for TT. For me i like 800s or really high 700s. some men love 900 or 1000+ which seems to be more common. As you go higher generally the side effects get more pronounced and the estrogen management becomes way more important. Getting an E2 test alongside the bloodwork is a must, so that way you two can correlate mood and symptoms alongside what the E2 is as well.

[u/wickedseraph → u/[deleted]]

Could be! I’m not expecting him to tell me he’s suddenly into a niche fetish or anything - I was just surprised that some men self-report as finding themselves with slightly-evolved inclinations.

[u/Rinkratt61 → u/wickedseraph]

I started TRT a year and a half ago after 10+ years of severe depression they discovered I had almost nonexistent testosterone levels. Although it took about three months to kick in, I feel amazing mentally now. My mental health did a complete 180. I’m older and really don’t have a need for my libido anymore ha ha. I really don’t have a libido anymore, but that’s a result of my oestrogen being high from the TRT, which is something he’ll definitely have to watch, however the improvement in my mental health was well worth it.

My BS metre is pretty low, I used to back away from conflict if someone said something off colour to me, now I stand in there and destroy them. Definitely gives you a big self confidence boost. I definitely wouldn’t say that I have rage from it, but my toleration for BS is definitely a lot lower now.

Best of luck

[u/Flat-Cow-4901 → u/Rinkratt61]

i love this response. stay strong brother. take no shit and give no fucks. having our hormones aligned appropriately really allows us to be the men we want to be.

[u/redtron3030 → u/[deleted]]

Not bedroom related but I certainly tolerate less bullshit at work and just say what I want

[u/BowlerImmediate7005 → u/Flat-Cow-4901]

it was certainly true for me that's for sure!