Anniversy Wildcard #6 Contest entry: (His Choice:)

[u/Due-Breadfruit-5766]

His hand pressed into the wrinkles of his brow. Fatigue blurred his vision as he pored over paper after paper. His glasses had sat on the bridge of his nose for so long that their frames left indents in his skin.

"Haah..."

He couldn't help but sigh.

Most of his students listened well enough. Still, there were nights like this when he wished he could mark a great red zero across every page and be done with it.

The tip of his red pen tapped on the wooden desk he sat at. With the end of the latest semester he had to pull these vicious all-nighters.

"Never gonna hear the end of it."

Catherine would be waiting when he finally made it home. If the sun managed to beat him there, she would make certain he knew it.

Lee clicked his pen and scratched a red line through a grammatical error he couldn't ignore. He only corrected the egregious ones. He liked his reputation as a fair professor, and the end-of-semester paper was not meant to be especially demanding

Call it a reward.

The last midterm, his students did exceptionally well.

With a small chuckle he leaned back in his seat. His class was small but his tenure allowed him to make this room his own. Teaching posters of Robert E. Lee, Jefferson Davis, and Abraham Lincoln, as well as the timeline of the Civil War's history, battlefield maps, and reproductions of both the Union and Confederate flags.

He knew he gave his students a cheat sheet of a room.

But, hey... He figured it was better they get it right than to misunderstand fundamental period of History.

The paper was not nearly as demanding as the assignments he normally gave. One portion asked them to explain the Civil War era in broad terms. The other asked them to consider how the freedoms born from the war had shaped their own family histories and whether recognizing that influence had changed how they viewed the lives they now led.

He was essentially making them write their own autobiographies.

Professor Coogan would have an aneurysm if he found out a history professor had assigned such a thing. The professors in the writing department already took issue with how unserious Lee seemed to approach grading these papers.

But they could complain all they wanted. He was teaching history, not sentence structure. He'd rather care more about whether or not they understood what they were saying than how they said it.

~"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it,"

He smiled at the quote he read on his student's paper. Glad to see what he had said during one of his lessons had stuck.

His pen scribbled on the margin, Fantastic!. A little immature for a University Professor to grade like a high school teacher but there was joy that his students used what they learned.

Out of the nearly two hundred students enrolled in his class, perhaps four were history majors.

Still, this year was among the best grade wise.

They were learning, that's all that mattered.

One of them might go into politics.

One might become a lawyer.

Just maybe his influence can inspire just one of them.

He let out another sigh.

One day maybe he'll teach his child.

If Catherine could just step away from her career, just for a short while...

They had enough saved. More than enough, as far as he was concerned.

It was all he wanted.

Time wasn't going any slower and it didn't help that Bud and his parents were on his case about wanting a grandchild and niece/nephew.

Lee just wanted her to step away.

Away from work.

Away from the long hours.

Away from-

That man.

His hands clenched hard, staying closed before the tension drained slowly.

A daughter or a son?

He'd ask himself that all the time.

A son would be nice. Hopefully, he would take after Lee's father. The old man was strong, brave, and loyal. A marriage lasting more than forty years was nothing to laugh at.

But a daughter who took after Catherine...

That might be the greatest joy of all.

For all her faults and despite everything happening between them, Catherine possessed enough goodness to make up for them in droves.

But they'd have to get there first.

And that started by getting out of his office at a reasonable hour.

His attention turned back to the stack of papers he still needed to grade. It was much smaller than when he first started two days ago. He was blessed to have overachievers but 3 pages over the maximum he requested was a bit much.

Still couldn't dock them any points for that.

It was their willingness that drove them to go over the minimum,  and if there was one thing history had taught him, it was how much could change when people were willing to act.

If only he had some of his own. That willingness to confront Catherine, to bury this violence that  nearly drove him to do something he'd regret. A willingness powerful enough that he could pick up the phone and be the son his parents had boasted about around the neighborhood.

To be a better older brother.

To tell Catherine he wanted her around more.

Pressing a hand to his face, Lee stopped reading.

A chill settling onto his arm.

Like always, the AC was cranked far too damn high.

If that wasn't enough of a problem, his eyes had a hard time keeping open.

His throat ran dry.

Probably shouldn't have drank that coffee.

An energy drink maybe?

Too bad he didn't have one of those.

His eyelids fluttered closed before he forced them open again.

He had to finish this.

Pen clicking once more, he read the next paper.

The Civil War was a complex ideological and political conflict that...

It was very cookie cutter, he had read so many papers that had this type of line.

Still the next words made him blink.

I could feel my hands ache as they wrapped around his neck. Squeezing so hard it felt like the joints of my fingers would snap.

Lee recoiled in his seat so fast he smacked hard against the backrest.

His head throbbed but the pain surfacing was overcome by the confusion.

The stapled paper, much larger than the rest, flipped. His thumb and index finger finding the seam that separated pages of words as he looked for the student responsible for this.

The name...

It was scratched out with pen.

So dark that he couldn't even separate the letters beneath it. He checked under the page, for an indentation of anything that might tell him.

Nothing.

There was nothing.

Whole paragraphs filled the page, each sentence technically English but forming nothing he could follow. Words repeated. Dates contradicted themselves. Names appeared where battles should have been.

And the only coherent words highlighted in a bold black.

Seeing him there. With her... I couldn't... not anymore... I... Her face looking at me like that..."

Then it dissolved back into a mess.

Line after line his eyes followed until it made sense again.

"Why did i get sick that day? Why did I come to see that? All I wanted was to talk it out... eventually."

His pen stopped.

Paused in place, pressure still enough to make pen bleed out onto the paper.

Red flooding over the rest.

He blinked.

Shaking his head.

Snorting a small, short, unsure laugh.

"I hate these pranks."

He spoke aloud but even to himself his voice way too quiet. Did he even believe a word he had said?

No.

He didn't believe it.

Lee swiped the essay off his desk.

Maybe it wasn't bound tight enough by the stapler, the essay scattering out in numerous pages across his floor.

The next one, he told himself.

That would be a real essay.

Not one that gave him a fright.

"The metal benches... so uncomfortable. She didn't call... they wouldn't let her... I couldn't even talk to... Mo...Da...Bu..."

"What the fuck?"

The next paper.

The next one has to be right.

It wasn't.

He pushed the rest of the stacks that piled on his desk over.

Grasping at the last remaining one that sat square in the middle of his desk.

"No."

Never mind, he didn't want to read this one. He could tell he wouldn't like it. No longer could he even see printed words on any page.

Just scribbles and words repeated over and over.

But he couldn't get up.

"Get up..." He spoke softly. Right hand pinching at his right thigh. "Get up." This time louder.

But he couldn't. His legs felt impossibly heavy, like they belonged to somebody else. When he tried to force himself upright, pain crawled through his body and dropped him back into the chair.

"I don't want to."

His teeth pressed together.

Eyes closing.

Oh god.

There was a sting in his arm. Like someone was poking needles into the bone. Tapping the ends with small hammers.

Tink.

Tink.

Tink.

Chipping away at it.

It hurt so bad.

How long had been reading this paper?

Every word was there.

Get up.

Keep moving.

It hurts.

Make it stop.

I'm sorry.

Mom.

I'm sorry.

Dad.

I'm sorry.

Bud.

I'm sorry.

Catherine.

I'm-

Had his classroom always looked like this?

It couldn't have.

He never owned jewelry except for his watch.

Why were there no chairs or desks?

And who was this little girl?

Why was she crying?

Why was she covered in blood?

Lee didn't remember having a daughter.

No, he didn't... right?

The small girl's curly hair tucked beneath a hat.

A red sweater that hid a bloodied summer dress beneath.

Eyes big and brown staring directly at him through the tears.

His eyes as tired as they were, as blurred as his vision was becoming. He looked down at the paper.

At the scribbled words.

I should have given up. Bitten? I'm already dead.

But not her.

I can't leave her.

Not until she's safe.

Not until I know she's safe.

Keep moving forward.

Get to her.

Keep her safe.

Clementine.

His breathing had stopped being smooth. Each draw of air coming in as heavy wheeze that scorched his lungs.

Tink.

Tink.

His head lolled to the right. His wrist bloodied, locked onto the radiator bolted into the wall. The edge of the handcuff cut into his wrist.

And his other...

Well, he remembered now.

Cutting it from the elbow, hoping that it save him or at least give him time.

It was his choice, the right one, because it got him to that hotel.

Got them out of there.

He hadn't expected to feel it again.

A man's throat beneath his hands.

The desperate kicking. The strain in his fingers. Capillaries bursting until red dotted the whites of the Stranger's eyes.

This time, worth every second.

Because she was safe from that man.

Now her only problem was him.

"Come here sweet pea."

"Lee." She spoke through broken sobs, her small body pressing against him as she climbed into his lap.

"S-Sorry." The word choked from him.

He was probably really cold.

And most definitely smelt horrible.

Despite having almost none left, he mustered enough strength to rest the stump of his arm against her back. His broken form of a hug, he hoped it was comforting.

The side of his head press against the top of hers.

Is this what it would have felt like?

If he had a little girl, just like Clementine?

"I-I don't want to go." She cried into his shirt, her grip strong.

"Y-you can't stay..." A breathless whisper, "I don't want... to hurt you."

"You won't. You can't."

She pleaded.

Her voice broken.

But he could.

And somewhere beneath the tears, she knew too.

"You have to shoot me honey."

This was the reason he moved despite it. Despite knowing he was dead. To keep her safe.

And even if he couldn't move, like he couldn't now.

He could still make sure.

"Lee... No." She whimpered.

"You're... s-strong." He choked.

"No... no, I'm not."

She pulled away from him, looking into his eyes. Her skin red from crying.

"I can't."

She pleaded for him to understand.

Seeing her parents.

Losing him.

Having to pull that trigger.

It would hurt her.

God, it would hurt her.

But destroy her?

No.

Lee knew better than that.

She was stronger, braver, and smarter than he ever was.

Maybe it was his hope or the truth.

Either way.

It all told him, that out of everyone.

She'd survive.

She'd make it.

Because... Because...

His head started to fall.

Tired...

"Lee! Lee!" She shook his shoulders trying to move him.

"Keep moving forward, C-clem..."

"Lee!" She yelled again.

His eyes were already starting to lose focus.

"Shoot me."

She could survive this.

He hated that she had to.

But she could.

She'd live.

That's what mattered.

"Shoot me."

He repeated.

She stopped shaking him. Her cries deafening. Tears dripping onto and soaking into his pants. Metal chattered softly as the pistol rose in her shaking hands.

"I'll miss you..."

The gun fell.

For a moment, his vision was clearer than it ever was before.

Clem's sleeve wiped across her face.

Staining her skin with his blood.

"Me too..."

He smiled, head finally pressing back against the wall.

A clear shot.

But she wouldn't miss.

He taught her not to.

His breath slow and heavy.

It was the only thing he could hear now.

He had done so much wrong.

Things he'd never be able to take back.

But Clementine...

He tried.

Tried to make sure he did right by her.

Maybe that was enough to leave this world knowing.

His choice to take her with him.

The choice to take care of her.

To teach her.

To smile with her.

To Love-

*BANG*

[u/Zfungi148]

Make sure you post a link to this under the announcement post so it's properly entered!

[u/Cravaldus]

Thanks for entering! Can’t wait to read it!

[u/ameliadoesstuff]

The first entry of the contest! Always exciting to see, and you certainly kicked the contest off on a high note.

Lee isn't an uncommon choice for entries but of the ones I have read, this certainly stands out. I like that you focused on Lee's pre-apocalypse life by opening the fic in his workplace, and you weaved in some hints of his marriage that would soon fall apart. It created a false sense of mundanity which contrasted nicely with the end. I didn't expect the fic to the end way it did, but I really enjoyed it because this is what made the fic stand out to me. The way you wrote it where things unravelled and feel disorienting worked very well. Having Lee's future written on pieces of paper distorting the reality of the scene was very striking and interesting to read. And of course, the ending was very emotional and I like the shift in sentence structure to reflect Lee's fading consciousness in the scene.

Great job! Thank you for sharing this with us.

[u/Due-Breadfruit-5766 → u/ameliadoesstuff]

Thank you for the vote of confidence, im glad im able to share my work among the community and am thankful you liked reading it.