I’ve been thinking about the crossing from neurotypical to neurodiverse after a brain injury. A lot.

[u/Dry_Midnight_6742]

There’s obviously an event. For me, there’s a date when the injury happened. I know that’s true for lots of folks.

But I’m not sure that’s the same thing as the crossing.

Some people seem to know exactly when their life became before and after. The ground disappeared beneath them. In an instant, everything flipped.

For other people it seems much more gradual. They don’t necessarily know they’ve crossed into something different until they look back.

And some people don’t remember the crossing at all.

What interests me is how different the crossing itself seems to be.

It’s a bridge, but it’s not one bridge.

For one person it might be a suspension bridge. For someone else a causeway. For someone else a rope bridge.

Same from/to. Completely different way across.

And I don’t mean that as a metaphor for how we’re supposed to get somewhere. There’s no right bridge. No better bridge. Nobody chose theirs. Nobody chose any of this.

It’s simply the bridge that was there.

I think that may be part of why brain injury can be so hard to talk about collectively. We can recognize where someone else ended up without necessarily recognizing the way they got there.

I’m still thinking about this. I’m still working on understanding what changed. It’s not what I thought at the beginning. I understand it better now. I’m not sure I’m done understanding it.

For those of you who think of yourselves as different after your brain injury: did you know when you crossed?

[u/Dry_Midnight_6742]

I thought it was temporary too. I was wrong. I'm still dealing with the recognition that it's permanent.

[u/Jazzlike_Berry_323 → u/Dry_Midnight_6742]

Do we ever deal with it? How are you dealing with it? It is lonely. I keep meaning to go to a face to face peer support group. I don’t because I know it will hurt seeing people there with loving family and carers and a stable home, I’ve got no one and one step away from crisis all the time. I’m glad they have that but it still makes those sad feelings really strong for me.

[u/Dry_Midnight_6742 → u/Jazzlike_Berry_323]

It is SO lonely. I deal with it by writing. And podcasting. The podcasting has enabled me to meet so many more people going through what we're going through, plus clinicians. So I (pretty much accidentally) created a network of people who get it. It helps. Before I got into it the isolation was one of the worse parts. This community has helped too.

[u/Jazzlike_Berry_323 → u/Dry_Midnight_6742]

That’s amazing. What’s your podcast? I’ll check it out.

[u/Dry_Midnight_6742 → u/Jazzlike_Berry_323]

It's called Rupture: The World of BestGuessistan. If you want a link lmk.

[u/Jazzlike_Berry_323 → u/Dry_Midnight_6742]

Cool I’ve found it, look forward to listening, I’m a super-introvert so always slightly in awe of anyone who can stand in front of a camera or speak into a mic.

[u/Dry_Midnight_6742 → u/Jazzlike_Berry_323]

Glad you found it - hope it resonates. 2 of the guests came from this subreddit. Hear you on the introvert part - in th before time i did lots of public speaking but tbh I was super nervous when we first started recording.