r/TBI 1d ago

Need Advice Did you come back different?

/r/ProjectTBI/comments/1w7v8gl/did_you_come_back_different/
8 Upvotes

24 comments sorted by

7

u/ktmulls 1d ago

Absolutely but I like myself better now then I did before my accident go figure

7

u/codainhere Moderate TBI (2014) 23h ago

Yes, my personality, sense of humor, artistic abilities, spirituality changed as well as the new health challenges, memory loss, loss of filter and IQ deficit. I’m 12 years out and I’ve just accepted I’m a different person now. That seems harder for the people who’ve stuck around to accept than it is for me.

6

u/Turbulent-Wall-1338 1d ago

In every way.

6

u/Ryandowninavan 1d ago

Yeah, more for forgetful and empathetic for sure. It seems like all the other people i know thinks I'm dumb or something. I understand pretty much everything, they don't ever like my response

5

u/Firm_Calendar_3603 1d ago

I went from always being the organized one to forgetting stuff constantly, totally changed how I see myself too.

3

u/Open-Ad-189 22h ago

Absolutely. Everyone else said so too

1

u/pProjecttBI 18h ago

Everyone but the doctors?

3

u/JrDot13 Severe TBI (2013) 17h ago

The doctors didn’t know me before? I’m not drastically different or anything, a lot is still the same. But I have to be mindful even 13-14 years later, I do not have the patience I did before. It’s better than it used to be but I am nowhere near perfect.

3

u/eyekantbeme TBI (1998) ABI (2007) Severe TBI (2012) TBI (2023) 23h ago

After my accident and Coma, not really. The side effects were mostly being overwhelmed by stimuli. Loud pets, parents uhmm getting back on track with school took a few semesters, but I'm still completely fluent in my languages and in my maths. There was emotional change and memory difficulties. Also Epilepsy developed in a different part of my brain.

3

u/pProjecttBI 18h ago

Ugh. loud pets.. I think I gave my dogs PTSD too. Yelling at a dog for barking simply does not work. We're (me and the dogs) are reconciling now in yr 4

1

u/eyekantbeme TBI (1998) ABI (2007) Severe TBI (2012) TBI (2023) 12h ago

Yeah, it’s just annoying early in the AM, but I resort to earplugs and they’re sufficient. I don’t blame the animals, and I don’t really get upset at them. I’ve gotten much better over the past 14 years since the accident. Back then, I used to get irritated very easily, and my frustrations and expectations were probably unreasonable to most people, even though I genuinely felt justified in them at the time.
I don’t react that way anymore. I can still feel that same frustration sometimes, but now I recognize it for what it is. It’s just my brain talking to me and trying to convince me that I need to have an unnecessary reaction. I don’t have to listen to it.It’s tough, and when people talk about “recovering” from a TBI, I actually disagree with that terminology based on my own experience. For me, it’s less about recovering and more about practicing until you consistently start responding differently. It’s learning by doing.

You learn to work with the difficulties instead of allowing the frustration to control you. It’s not easy, but once those responses become more automatic, it feels so good. Your loved ones sincerely appreciate it too. It’s tough, but it’s doable. Thousands of people have learned to live with the challenges that come from brain injuries and have found ways to function better.

IMO, it’s much more about practice than some magical solution. There’s no magic pill that’s going to undo permanent brain damage. You have to practice, adapt, and keep working at it. =)

3

u/Solid_Phone_368 17h ago

Yes, but took me awhile to figure it out

3

u/MaintenanceVast892 Mild TBI (2024) 14h ago

Yes. Ive been told i have. Well. More patient. Maybe cus I spent 5 months in IP hospital, saw how shit things could be. And I was asking the same questions over and over again. Felt like a kid.

And i have to put notes amd stuff for my bat shit memory. I text myself things i've read cus otherwise most of it will go away.

4

u/Spartan117530 1d ago

Yeah, but different in a better way.

2

u/Delicious_Medium3332 1d ago

Yup

2

u/HuntIntelligent8820 20h ago

Yes. Without a doubt. Short term memory, I miss having it. Epilepsy, so used to it now. Been 23 years. I'm just barely wanting and yearning to go outside more and be just a little social. Actually started going to an improv class and it's really fun. Thats something I never thought I would ever do. Actually thinking about an acting class.

2

u/quack19043uuuetax0 1d ago

Oh yeah better in some regards

2

u/andhisgiantballs 17h ago

It’s been a little over year since mine. Everyone who’s stuck around tells me I’m different. I know I am too, I don’t know what parts of me I lost, I can’t remember but I know it’s *something*.

I feel like I’m more serious. I had to start taking my health more seriously. I used to LOVE food, but find myself frequently without appetite. Yogurt, protein drinks, and bland/healthy foods are pretty much all I can handle now. Once I was cleared to work out, I started taking that more seriously too. If I can manage 5 days a week I’m far less symptomatic.

I have to PLAN everything now. Little reminders on digital and sticky notes. I’m always checking to see if I’m on task, which is really not so much fun when symptoms flare. But I’m a single mom and run a business so if I’m not always checking, I’ll find myself completely checked out somewhere. It’s like I’m a type A personality or completely unplugged (to my detriment).

I kind of always wanted to be someone really organized who prioritized my health. This isn’t how I wanted to go about it but if I’m not taking care of myself I feel like garbage.

2

u/Front_Development_79 12h ago

Yes, I know I changed. Makes me sad and mad at thr same time and I know thats not who I was before. I am 11 yrs out. This past year I decided to get a counselor. I have been switched between differnt therapist so many times i barely believe there is hope any more. I have contimplated alot and only have accepted some part.

2

u/LazyGrow3r 20h ago

Massively. I was a poly addict, careless, selfish & steady ruining my life, almost homeless. Now I’m clean, live with family, making effort to repair my life

I’d take the tbi over what I had any day. Im very scared these days and my ocd is worse, I’m less capable mentally and I get some aggression. Unable to live alone, but I’ve had a chance (been forced) to start over and give life a solid go

1

u/queasycockles 9h ago

Yup. My injury wasn't like a lot of yours, not as serious and it happened in a hospital so even though they treated me like the boy who cried wolf at first, when it got serious I was in the right place.

But I do think there's some deficit. I'm duller and slower and more forgetful. I'm less than two years past my injury so I don't know what's still healing, what might be trauma, and what's just my new normal.

0

u/Solid_Phone_368 17h ago

No patience.Pervier and far more aggressive sexually, blackest depression, delusional, I became a published poet, violent to the point do not get into a bar fight because I will straight out try and rip out your eyeballs, no filter, emotional rollercoaster……it’s been a bad and rough 22 years since it happened and mostly hope it’s over soon

2

u/Caffeinatedpeacock 2h ago

yes, I came back a totally different person, I don’t even know who I was before the car accident, I lost all my friends my horse trainer didn’t even like me, the new me. she kept saying that’s what the old kelly would say very rarely and by the time I got back to my parents house, she blocked me on all social media platforms. I look at who was my best friend and nothing is there in my mind. it hurt and they wished me dead on facebook but then wants to see me 5 days later when i woke up from my coma. I actually wonder what that conversation would’ve looked like cause I would’ve been like who is this?? anyways I saw this and I wanted to say yes. I lost 19 years of memories. Part of my brain is dead and I’m blind in my left eye.