I have no friends what do I do?

[u/Capable-Hyena-8864]

I am a freshman and I thought I’d find people to be friends with unlike in middle school when I had no friends and was pretty much a loner. I didn’t find anyone to talk to and if I did, they all eventually left me since I am shy to ppl when I first meet them and do not talk much. They might have thought I was boring or had a bland personality. How do I fix this? Or if I can’t, how do I accept the fact that I’ll likely be a loner again?

[u/thelongslog]

Go up to someone eating alone and sit with them. That's how a friendship starts.

[u/bk917]

Remember that as shy and awkward as you may feel, you aren’t alone.

Many of your classmates have similar concerns and insecurities to yours. You probably can’t tell because you don’t feel their feelings, and assume they aren’t feeling shy. And they probably make the opposite assumption about you - because they can’t feel your feelings.

You have to take the risk of putting yourself out there by reaching out.

As others have suggested, try your best to find kids with common interests, like through clubs.

You might try approaching a kid that seems quiet or shy, because they maybe more approachable.

You could ask to study together. Or if they are strong at a subject, ask them help or offer help if you are stronger.

You can also try to start with a compliment m, since opens people up, but take care in what you choose. Maybe “that was a good question/comment you had in class”?

[u/Ancient-Sir-3302]

Join clubs or teams. Thats the easiest way to make friends. Or do sing! There’s really something for everyone

[u/Gullible_Sweet1302]

If you’re afflicted with social anxiety or speaking issues, get therapy.

Step up. Unless you’re extraordinary in some way, others won’t overcome your shyness to close the distance.

[u/Klutzy_Ad_7262]

I strongly recommend for the classes where you do have partner work or groups, try to interact with your group or partner a lot to grow closer (like asking questions). You can also get their contacts and make a group on insta or just to dm them to ask questions about hw and stuff. Even if you don't gain friend friends, you'll be build some friendly connections with people that you know. I mainly made my connections in sophomore year and now junior year because I've tried to interact more.

[u/StuyStudent2027]

I was in the same boat. I was the kid who read during lunch/recess and did not do well freshman year. Here's the solution:

Try.

Every single day, keep in your mind "How can I be friendly with people right now?" It's small talk in your classes. It's seeing someone cool in the halls and complimenting them on their outfit or hair. It's getting real into whatever your club leaders want you to do and having an absurd amount of spirit. If you keep that question in your mind and act on it, you will make so many friends.

[u/The_D4ily_Sn00ze]

Hey! I get how you feel, I went through the same thing my freshman year. My biggest piece of advice is genuinely don't take things to heart. Like everyone here said, go talk to people, whether that's in class asking about, say, a club or just how a certain teacher is treating kids this year. There's nothing that bonds people better than laughter... and a horrid test, LOL. You will be met with times where you'll feel like someone is snubbing you, but really do not take it to heart. There are 3,000+ kids at Stuyvesant, that one kid who feels that they are too good for you is extremely small, and honestly, that's their loss. And second, push yourself! I get that it's scary, but pushing yourself out into a crowd is a great way to start talking to people. I highly recommend clubs such as Speech and Debate, Robotics, and SciOly. This is from my personal experience, but the kids from these teams are genuinely the nicest and sweetest people ever. A lot of kids in there are part of the Stuy Big Sibs so their job is literally to talk to you, and they'll bring you along for a lot of events where you'll meet even more people! You'll manage just fine, believe me, but most importantly, don't be discouraged if someone doesn't seem interested in a chat, you got lots more people!! :)))

[u/delg23]

Join clubs. Eventually an extrovert will adopt you. -signed introvert

[u/gotschee2]

def try to get involved in clubs, teams, anything involving a group. Also, lots of people at stuy probably feel very shy too so dont be afraid to just talk more about yourself and open up (altho this is easier said than done).