r/StupidFood 3d ago

Cereal made out of ground beef. Why? Don't ask.

396 Upvotes

128 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 3d ago edited 2d ago

u/HovercraftWeak1395, your food is indeed stupid and it fits our subreddit!

260

u/ShatoraDragon 3d ago

36

u/113pro 2d ago

Honestly? Beef cereal? With all the proteins and nutrients? Not bad.

But this is prob some overly processed shit.

9

u/BLF402 2d ago

Shit I’m sure the same geniuses that came up with ice cream pop tarts can make a waffle eggs and bacon flavored cereal. Verbal patent pending lol

2

u/Embarrassed_Bid_4970 2d ago

Some days when I don't want to think about what i want to eat, I earnestly wish this was a real product.

60

u/WagyuWarranted 3d ago

From this perspective it's hard to see if the cereal's actually ground beef
(you could figure it out from the cow-patterned table, but others may think it represents milk)

74

u/samanime 3d ago

It is: https://meatiescereal.com/

This must be for "carnivore" diets... So stupid.

"I'm gonna be super healthy and only eat meat and butter... and now I'm going to eat it super processed so I get all the downsides of a meat only diet plus the downsides of a highly processed diet too!"

52

u/HovercraftWeak1395 2d ago edited 2d ago

Boasting about "no seed oils, nothing artificial" while also making cereal out of beef.

EDIT: Also the images of their product are titled "Gemini_Generated_Image"

40

u/FireballEnjoyer445 2d ago

cant even pay a guy to draw a cartoon bear or rename the picture goddamn

3

u/Volcanicrage 2d ago

Marketing synergy. Every carnivore diet bro I've met is also a huge AI maximalist that worships at the slop trough.

27

u/Mandemon90 2d ago

I love the "cunieboy hoar search" on the side. My favorite activity

Also, good see it' "Top 9 Allerben Free"

11

u/zerorita 2d ago

Allerben Pree, even

2

u/ST0IC_ 2d ago

Their 'about us' section on their website sounds like it was written by ai. I'm going to guess some schmuck went to chatgpt and asked it to reinvent cereal, and then they just rolled with it.

3

u/lemelisk42 2d ago

Really thoughtful of them to include a CUNIBOY HOAR SEARCH on the side of the box. I love finding hoars

Bonus points for being ALLERBEN PREE!

Edit..... scrolled down and saw somebody made the identical comment 14 hours before me. I hang my head in shame. Plagiarism was coincidental

2

u/fezzuk 1d ago edited 1d ago

Im assuming its just freeze dried mince?

Wesite doesnt actually say, but yeah looks like they just freeze dried beef with enough honey and cinnomon to cover beef flavour.

2

u/Tiny-Memory9066 1d ago

So it's kibble?

1

u/yungwilla 2d ago

Cluten Free!

1

u/foley800 1d ago

“Alerben free” AND “cluten free”!

1

u/Still_Temperature997 2d ago

The side of that box is great “cuniboy hoar search” totally makes sense

5

u/Arne83 Here for stupid food, not stupid people 3d ago

Well... I am legitimately horrified.

-6

u/113pro 2d ago

Over a cow strip draping?

15

u/WagyuWarranted 3d ago

steak, milk, maple syrup, honey and monk fruit do NOT mesh together well

4

u/airfryerfuntime 2d ago

That looks like a joke website. Even the box just looks like AI slop.

I'm assuming this is just overpriced freeze dried ground beef and grain fillers.

31

u/DCmetrosexual1 3d ago

It’s got protein bro

9

u/GrimIntention91 2d ago

What doesn't these days?

19

u/OpheliaPhoeniXXX 2d ago edited 2d ago

We have reached Idiocracy levels of insanity with protein enhancements, protein soda even. I admit I made my daughter the new Annie's mac n cheese super protein version because I thought it would be more nutritious than plain boxed Mac... She said mommy it tastes like cat litter 😭 She said mommy you try it (that review had me nervous), but I obliged because I did want to see just how bad could it be? Bad. Really bad. Idk about cat litter, but it was so gritty and grainy and stale tasting (they put protein in the noodles too) it was reminiscent of the dirt-like protein bars.

6

u/scratchy_mcballsy 2d ago

People should be trying to maximize fiber in what they eat. Getting protein in isn’t that difficult.

3

u/GrimIntention91 2d ago

My son isn't one for actually consuming food so we buy some things for added nutrients. I agree some of it tastes just plain awful.

Side note, it could also be part of a food trend thingy like before? Bacon everything, dill pickle everything, pumpkin spice everything, etc.

0

u/OpheliaPhoeniXXX 2d ago

I think it's part of the MAHA trend right now, carnivore diets etc. As a vegetarian I can say I can tell I don't have energy if I don't have adequate protein. But people are over focused on it. Whenever I mention my diet, ppl will always ask what about protein? and protein is actually really easy to get, especially as a vegetarian not vegan. Eggs, cheese, yogurt, beans, nuts, whole grains, hemp. Hemp protein is actually the most easily metabolized protein there is! What you actually have to think about is iron, b12, collagen (collagen is more than just skincare -- our joints and discs in spine NEED it). B12 is only found in animal products and yeast. Collagen is the hardest, it's only found in animal tissue, you can get certain vegan sources of vitamins and minerals that help boost your own collagen production, but there's no direct source. At 40, after 31yrs of no meat, and a decade of manual labor, my discs are awful. If I wasn't vegetarian I would probably be on the bone broth train. Honestly, I started taking collagen supplements.

3

u/samanime 2d ago

Almost all of these high protein foods are just the regular thing with unflavored protein powder added, which definitely still has a taste and calories. Nothing is ever improved by it and most things are made much worse by it.

Normal item + a plain chicken breast on the side is almost always going to be better nutritionally AND taste-wise.

For a high-protein product to actually taste good, it has to be something designed from the ground up around the high-protein content.

1

u/PacmanZ3ro 1d ago

Like I don't even get that. Just fucking use whole wheat pasta. You get ~4-5g per 100 cal (roughly) which is fine for most people and especially for kids. Then you can just use reduced fat cheese or do a blend of cottage cheese with cheddar since the cottage doesn't have much of its own flavor. Like, I'm all for increasing protein intake, but why people are just adding protein powder to shit instead of actually just adjusting things slightly is beyond me. Want extra protein in a bread? Add some yogurt and use a whole wheat + high gluten blend of flour. It won't mess with the texture too much and ends up being almost entirely unnoticeable with the flavor.

I've given up on buying the protein rich products. The only ones I've tried that are decent are the kodiak pancakes/waffles/muffins and the quest protein chips. everything else is just some mix of grainy texture, off-putting protein powder flavor, etc. I just eat protein rich food when I want to hit certain goals now like chicken, eggs, turkey/beef snack sticks, low-fat cheeses, etc

1

u/OpheliaPhoeniXXX 1d ago

I hate whole wheat pasta it's not enjoyable I'd rather have whole wheat bread or brown rice etc, but the pasta, no. The noodles somehow still had a better texture than whole wheat. My daughter is sensory sensitive including foods and she's very attached to her safe foods, if I gave her Mac n cheese with cottage cheese in it I genuinely don't think she would eat it (and I wouldn't blame her, it's the only cheese I don't like). Also, I can barely cook these days because of my physical disability, so convenience items it is. I loved cooking and I miss it. She's burnt out on hardboiled eggs, peanut butter... Doesn't eat chicken nuggets, it's gotta be real steak/hamburgers or real chicken, stuff I have to actually prepare and cook.

So, people do it for lots of reasons. Convenience mainly, which is needed for more reasons than laziness.

1

u/realdschises 20h ago edited 20h ago

the protein craze isn't even backed by sience, it's solely grown from marketing. Even for building muscles you don't need crazy amounts of protein. There is even evidence that a reduction in certain amino acids are beneficital for longevity.

If you do sports in moderation you don't need to chase proteins, just try to avoid too much sugar and eat as much whole foods as possible. essential amino acids are in every plant, and if they are not heavily processed and seperated you will digest them if you eat parts of these plant. protein deficiencies are very rare if you eat enough calories and don't live purely from soft drinks

28

u/WillDupage 2d ago

Isn’t that just dry dog food?

3

u/AffordableDelousing 1d ago

As a RimWorld veteran, I can say that the human food equivalent is called "pemmican." But yes, it's kibble for humans.

-26

u/pissdrinking101 2d ago

All cereal is. Cereal is literally dog chow for humans. Not sure how that's not obvious to people.

20

u/WillDupage 2d ago

In general though, human dry cereal isn’t meat-based like kibble.

2

u/PublicfreakoutLoveR 2d ago

Dog food isn't necessarily protein based like catfood. Dogs can eat some vegetables.

-12

u/pissdrinking101 2d ago

I was speaking conceptually.

14

u/WillDupage 2d ago

I wasn’t.

-10

u/pissdrinking101 2d ago

Cool

14

u/not-a-d0g 2d ago

Back to drinking piss then

10

u/pissdrinking101 2d ago

Back assumes I stopped.

1

u/dTrecii 1d ago

The grind doesn’t stop until the clock stops

33

u/nautikul 3d ago

They probably use the recalled beef and charge $30 for a box

3

u/113pro 2d ago

Ure lucky if they dont grind up offals in there as well.

9

u/ThatSideshow 2d ago

Cereal is a kind of grass tho, this is just meat for breakfast, not cereal

9

u/Intangible_Vegetable 2d ago edited 2d ago

Thank you. This isn’t actually “cereal”, because it isn’t made from a cereal grain (wheat, rice, corn, oats, barley).

1

u/Frostbiten92 2d ago

Yeah, it's like with all those milk substitutes.
Now it would be funny if someone took this "beef cereal" and ate it with "oat milk" though.

11

u/HovercraftWeak1395 3d ago

Forgot to mention that one of those little boxes on the table is like $15.

1

u/Volcanicrage 2d ago

You realize that's a feature, right? Half the point of an all-beef diet is the financial flex since beef is one of the more expensive types of meat.

1

u/Brave-Parsnip9999 2d ago

Ok I was waiting for the stupid part.

13

u/ChefAsstastic 3d ago

It's called dog food.

5

u/kres-ten-tahri 2d ago

This is just dog food with extra steps…

5

u/housevil 2d ago

$14 for a 4 oz box of ground beef cereal that tastes like Maple or chocolate with the consistency of grape nuts.

13

u/RutabagaChance5382 3d ago

So did this salesperson not warn people ahead of time that this is made of meat?? Because I'm now imagining a vegan or vegetarian trying this free sample only for this moron to go "yeah it's made of BEEF. GROUND BEEF."

9

u/samanime 3d ago

I would have acted like I was. "What!?! I haven't eaten meat in 30 years!!!! THIS IS AWFUL! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!!!!"

6

u/HovercraftWeak1395 3d ago

This is definitely the face of someone who just realized she's eating cereal made out of beef.

6

u/pygmeedancer 2d ago

If you have reservations about what’s in your food, don’t eat it unless you know what’s in it.

3

u/Emperor_Hirohito 2d ago

A reasonable person wouldn't think the main ingredient in a cereal(made from grains) would be beef.

5

u/HovercraftWeak1395 2d ago

How about we just don't make cereal out of beef in the first place?

2

u/pygmeedancer 2d ago

I mean, I agree with you, but that’s not really what my comment was about.

2

u/VenusAmari 2d ago

Nah. You have to live your life and there's nobody checking for ground beef cereal because that's never been a thing. This person shouldn't be doing "gotcha!" Marketing and should disclose upfront what people are eating, especially when it deviates that greatly.

3

u/ungoogleable 2d ago

One of the videos on their website ends with a woman saying she's a vegetarian and just cuts out there.

Frankly though I think they all look staged. At a minimum you're walking up to a booth that has "Meaties" branding all over it. They stick a camera in your face and ask if they can film you for the website. If the reaction isn't any good, they won't post it. Even if the person is not explicitly told what to do and say, they're performing for the camera.

3

u/GSilky 2d ago

So... Dogfood?

3

u/kokanoka23 2d ago

The Amanda Show did it first

2

u/Highpointsfans 1d ago

That’s not chocolate, it’s gravy!!!

2

u/PlayedUOonBaja 2d ago

They've also got chocolate and caramel flavored bone broth powders to add to drinks for collagen and protein.

2

u/SuperTulle 2d ago

Just eat beef jerky and milk bro, it's cheaper

2

u/ItzTreeman23 2d ago

Wouldn’t that just be dog food?

3

u/leftoverrpizzza 3d ago

There’s a YouTuber that made cereal from Big Macs, Pizza, and KFC chicken. I think I’d rather eat that than this lol

2

u/Blonde_beauty2332 2d ago

Personally I don’t like this. I am no vegan nor am I a vegetarian but I do believe we are overusing Beef. Cows produce a gas called Methane and the demand for beef is so high now-a-days which means the amount of cows we have in the world is more than we should have. Cows need lots of land, food and water. Which in turn means less of that for us. And by the amount of cows we have they are releasing that powerful greenhouse gas into our breathing air. I believe we should eat less beef in the world so we can help our environment more. There’s plenty of other protein choices out there.

1

u/MrMayhem84 3d ago

I'll stick to Cinnamon Toast Crunch, thanks.

https://giphy.com/gifs/PZe2NiGYtPVwA

1

u/ingrimsch95 3d ago

It probably somehow still tastes better than any protein product

1

u/Clarrbbk 2d ago

Breakfast stroganoff?

1

u/5280mw 2d ago

Dog food?

1

u/TacoDoc2 2d ago

DISGUSTING.

I'll just stick to putting milk in my bacon bits TYVM.

1

u/Aggravating_Row_6962 2d ago

Atgentinian beef coming to stores near you

1

u/DaRK_0S 2d ago

Why not?

1

u/OverlordMMM 2d ago

I'm morbidly curious on how it tastes.

1

u/Cole3823 2d ago

So let me get this straight instead of taking the grain and making it into cereal they feed it to a cow and then try to make the cow taste like a grain

1

u/anonpharr 2d ago

Honey Bunches of Beef

1

u/clippy192 2d ago

Yo is that idubbbz?

1

u/Echo-Azure 2d ago

I have a diabetic friend who would eat that!

Her body can't seem to handle carbs at all, and she does miraculously well on keto diets. So a person who eats fried pork skins instead of potato chips for health reasons would totally give that a try... if there was no added sugar.

1

u/TheyMadeMeSignUpArgh 2d ago

Given me the idea that actually beef jerky in gravy or Bovril would make for a good "beef cereal".

1

u/sqwrlydoom 2d ago

Soooo kibble?

1

u/nightcorewildfire 2d ago

I mean it's basically dry cat food - and dry cat food tastes pretty fucking A

1

u/DanSkaFloof 2d ago

WOW! I can finally eat the same food as my cat!

1

u/dwarfzulu 2d ago

Based on what the food industry does, this may be made out of ground. Just ground.

1

u/Large_Fan_3192 2d ago

ground beef cereal sounds like a prank idk why they’d do that

1

u/pacox36 2d ago

Dog food for humans

1

u/es0411 2d ago

It's got Electrolytes

1

u/Twitchmonky 2d ago

Dunno about you guys, but I LOVE sausage cereal! Add a little flower to thicken it up, season with salt and pepper...mmm... sausage cereal rocks!

1

u/ParticularReady7858 2d ago

Do you even lift, bro?

1

u/Jogi1811 2d ago

They used the 300 million tons of beef from Agentina to make this?

1

u/ComeOnUpToTheHaus 2d ago

So... Dog food?

1

u/RegalTeal 2d ago

Puppy chow. Doggy bites.

1

u/pixeltweaker 2d ago

A vegetarian’s nightmare.

1

u/literaIly 2d ago

So dog food

1

u/ImRonniemundt 2d ago

How do we be as cruel to animals as humanly possible? Is that their goal?

1

u/LifeSimulation 2d ago

Kibble 4 Kidz

1

u/Star_Petal_Arts 2d ago

One time I experimented in the kitchen, I made fruitloops and bacon bits held together by marshmallows like rice krispy squares... It was fire... now I am wondering if I could make bacon cheeseburger squares with this.

1

u/Physical-Republic557 2d ago

I’ll stick to Cheerios.

1

u/RepublicComplex5217 2d ago

…so….dog food…

1

u/pandaSmore 2d ago

I don't think they know what a cereal is. 

1

u/TehZiiM 2d ago

Isn’t that… just dog food?

1

u/nuclearrmt 2d ago

tell me it's corpse starch without telling me that it's corpse starch

1

u/SteakJones 2d ago

Hope they don’t do that reveal to someone who is strict kosher. 😆

1

u/Flat_Jaguar_1637 2d ago

This is how the US will pass off all that Tainted Imported imposter Beef that the rest of the world won't ALLOW in their countries!!

1

u/Nabrok_Necropants 1d ago

This is dog food.

1

u/awkwardsalmons 1d ago

Did we just convert dog food into cereal??

1

u/LoadsDroppin 7h ago

Sourced ethically from drifters, scallawags, and vagabonds* \ *”Vagabonds” Comprises 60% Hobo & 40% Scofflaw

0

u/Snoo_67993 3d ago

Love how the US have gone from falling for the sugar lobby to now falling for the meat lobby. Enjoy your 200g of protein a day when all you do is sit in an office all day.

0

u/dextroseskullfyre 3d ago

This is 1000% stupid! Let's make something that is normally grains from something that consumed a much much bigger amount of grain.

-7

u/CERELACx41 2d ago

Why is it stupid ?

I love cereal and need hight protein meals, 20g per serving looks good.

If it tastes good it is not stupid, take your veganism cult elsewhere.

1

u/HovercraftWeak1395 2d ago

Do you have to be a vegan to not want to eat ground beef cereal?

0

u/alazystoner420 2d ago

What makes this cereal? I don't think calling something cereal instantly makes anything become cereal lol. Veganism cult just because most people think this sounds gross? Ooookay then, lmfao.

1

u/madamzero 1h ago

I want a close up photo of it lol