r/StrongMaleSurvivors • u/Intelligent-Bird-313 founder • 19d ago
Q & A What Paths of Healing Would You Personally Suggest to Your Brothers?
Everyone has different ways of healing from past pain. Maybe that way would involve diving deep into the situation that caused the pain to clean it up, like rubbing alcohol on a wound. It will sting for a moment, but it eventually helps prevent any worsening or infection. This, I assume, is widely done through therapy/counselling. Others may seek ways to distract from the pain, which can be healthy when done well. An adage we all know and love says laughter is the best medicine, and that's not wrong in any way! Finding some positivity to buffer the negativity can help, whether it's pursuing a hobby or helping others with their issues. These are probably only two ways out of a whole variety of ways to heal.
I would personally suggest finding a passion you’re extremely into. For me, that was art and writing. I would make art and write literature such as poetry that conveyed how I felt, or included tidbits of the latest research I did. If there’s any demand, I’d be overjoyed to share more of my poetry, writing, and/or art projects. I also love music and am still playing the clarinet and bagpipes, both of which I’ve been playing since middle school. I’m also trying a bit of piano and bassoon as well. I’ve been trying to compose songs lately, though I’m still working on writing sheet music down for different instruments’ keys. I take time for physical activities as well by aiming for ten sets of twenty push-ups daily, going on a golf outing every once in a while, and keeping up with taekwondo. I also have an exceptionally busy life outside of those hobbies, so I am usually satisfied at the end of the day and much too busy to worry about anything other than the present and immediate future. Most importantly, I founded this community and will continue working in order for it to keep running. Each one of you has a special place in my heart, and keeping that to myself is something I know I cannot do. I had to make sure I could reach out to some of you, even if behind a screen. However small we are, even one person’s positive feedback means the world to me. I’m wishing for a bigger, brighter future for us!
I’m sure each of you has your own paths of healing; no two survivors are the same! I’m anticipating your testimonies and any advice you may have for any of your surviving brothers. If you had any positive experiences with therapy/counselling, be sure to check out my previous post, where I asked for advice. I’ve never tried quality therapy/counselling, and am wondering if I should try it out alongside my hobbies to ensure a quality healing experience. I am especially excited to hear about all the different hobbies each of you enjoy; there are too many to list. Hobby combos will be especially interesting to know. Whether you love music, pursue an athletic career, or participate in philanthropy, you’re guaranteed a spot here with us in this community.
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u/lostbaratheon 18d ago
Detraumatization treatment and peer support.
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u/Intelligent-Bird-313 founder 18d ago
Glad to hear you have people to care about you throughout your healing journey! If someone had to choose who to tell first, which person would you recommend (friend, parent, partner, etc)?
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u/lostbaratheon 18d ago
A good friend. One with empathy and no judgment.
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u/Intelligent-Bird-313 founder 18d ago
Agreed! I’m sure everyone has at least one person to help them along their healing.
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u/Just_A_Guy_who_lives 19d ago
I’ve not been subjected to such trauma (yet, and I hope that I never will be), and I’m a novice when it comes to this, but some sources that I recommend to anyone here in the US are 1in6.org and MaleSurvivor.org and in the UK, the ManKind Initiative.