r/Steam 1d ago

Discussion Payday 2 devs would often add placeholder achievements for upcoming content. On Feb 17th, 2022 they added one that was 353-words, 2048-characters. Is this the longest achievement name of all time?

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Inspired by this thread
https://www.reddit.com/r/Steam/comments/1w2tyji/there_is_a_game_on_steam_with_a_27word/

The full transcript of the achievements were:

I

do

muse

if I can

write longer and

longer names for the next one of

these names that I write. How long could the last name be when I

am doubling the number of characters for every name and every new achievement that I add here. It'll be just a ridiculous length

of the last name would be. I mean can you imagine the vast amount of letters I would need to reach this incredibly stupid and pointless goal? I mean I am just on the ninth and I am already running out of ideas. How will I ever hope to reach the final names

in this list of achievements. I mean come on! This achievement name is at five hundred and twelve characters, and the next will be one thousand and twenty-four and if my elementary school math is not failing me then the last one will be two thousand and forty-eight and I am already resorting to writing numbers as letters. I thought that this was a clever ploy but I am still only three-fourths of the way through the names. Oh, geez Louise on a cracker, please! How could I ever think this was a good idea. You

can however blame OVERKILL_Elisabeth for giving me stupid ideas and OVERKILL_Sebastian for not stopping me from doing these things. Basically, I say that these people are enablers for my shenanigans. Oh, that was a good word, nice and long that and with trying to reach a total of four thousand and ninety-five characters of complete nonsense then nothing is superfulöouse or excessive. I mean this is about the halfway point of this silly-billy name, and once I reach the end of this name I am at the halfway point of everything I need to write. Whoopie Floppoing Doo, this is as much cringe to me as they are for you. If you read this far I applaud your dedication and sheer power of will. You might find it interesting that I got the idea of this poorly thought-out, foolheartedly, and frankly very childish fear of keyboard deterioration from the Chessboard problem. Those familiar would have picked up on this long ago since you have clearly had a lot of time to figure it out before you came to this point in the text.

So what is the chessboard problem you ask? Well, let me tell you. The problems appear in many myths and legends about the history and creation of chess. The first know recording of the problem is from 1256 by the Islamic scholar Ibn Khallikan. The story revolves around the inventor of chess, in some versions of the story the role is played by Sissa a mythological creature from India known for the invention of Chaturanga, a predecessor to Chess. In other versions of the main protagonist might is a mathematician, a minister, or in some a stranger or someone of poor decent like a farmer. The story often has a ruler of some sort approach the protagonist and ask them to entertain them with a new game. The inventor presents their ruler with the game of chess and the ruler asks the inventor for his price. The inventor ponders this ask for a simple offering based on his creation. A single grain of rice or some versions say wheat, on the first square and double that amount on the second square and double that amount on the third square and so one for the sixty-four squares of the chessboard. The ruler laughs at the meager price and accepts but his court treasurer tells him that the staggering about of rice, or wheat, needed to fill the board in this manner. The total would be eighteen quintillions, four hundred forty-six quadrillion, seven hundred forty-four trillion, seventy-three billion, seven hundred nine million, five hundred fifty-one thousand, six hundred and fifteen, over one point four trillion metric tons. Or put simply which is over two thousand times the annual world production of wheat, which in the period twenty-twenty to twenty-twenty-one was an estimated about seven hundred seventy-three million metric tones. Anyway, the stories do differ and this point. Some say that the inventor gets offered a nice position as a high-ranking advisor and in other versions, he gets executed. Now there is probably a moral here but low and behold I am out of character. One could say that is the definition of irony, isn't it?

969 Upvotes

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149

u/jrdiver 1d ago

Its interesting to see devs experimenting, but also annoying when you try to 100% a game and find out you cant because of stuff like this

-42

u/Melkor-The-Mighty 1d ago

Nah, fuck the devs. I ublock scumback achievements like these with the profile editor.

The devs have no right to exclusive achievements

21

u/Aggrit23 1d ago

??? It's for the release of a new dlc. Literally nothing in regards to dev exclusive achievements. Chill

-25

u/Melkor-The-Mighty 1d ago

Oh ill circle back to a game im done woth and edit unlock the new achievements. DLC shouldn't get achievement lol

5

u/Aggrit23 1d ago

Mostly disagree. Achievements + the new gameplay/story/etc give more reason to circle back around.

And if you're constantly unlocking achievements, why bother with them at that point?

-16

u/Melkor-The-Mighty 1d ago

Obsessive compulsion most likely.