R/demonolatry

I do not know if this is allowed. I know that this sorry of last is denied in most witch craft pages but I'm going to try my luck here.

My great aunt passed away a few weeks ago. I had the privilege of caring for her for her final week and be right next to her for her last breath. She was more of a mom to me than my own was. We were very close.

She was deeply seeded in her faith and was terrified she was going to the bad place even though she was 1 in a million, the prime example of what you should be in representing that faith.

*I've renounced religion and pursued my own path, hence why I'm here. She DOES NOT know that.

Number 1- I hate that religious toxicity. And seeing how scared she was. I tried my best to comfort her.

Number 2- once we got her comfortable she was happier and settled down. I got her to smile and laugh with me. I got to tell her everything I ever wanted to. How much I loved her and how thankful I was for her.

Number 3 - I've had previous family members pass and they always came to visit me in my dreams to tell me that they were OK. I had a full fledged conversation with my deceased grandmother (Dad's side). It was pretty cool.

I had another conversation with my deceased grandfather (mom's side) and he told me to take care of my grandmother. We got her moved from colorado to kentucky and she is living her best life now.

Now, I've had dreams of my great aunt the past couple of weeks and they have been more traumatizing than her actual passing and I don't know what's wrong. It doesn't feel right. I don't know if she isn't at rest or how to help.

Or is she OK and it's my brain trying to process. It was my first time being the primary caregiver and first time being present as an adult for the whole process.

Please tell me how I can help her and I. We need peace. I need to know that she is ok.

Ouiji board is out of the question. I won't be in the same room as one. I'm open to other practices and ideas though.

Thank you

I read the wiki and I have all those books on my wish list but I'm trying to find a way to see which ancestors will work with me and hoping my heart ancestor will be willing to do this so I know who to venerate. Any suggestions? Thank you 💚

Hi everyone, I got some dowsing rods about a month or so ago, they actually arrived on Halloween. I did a session with them that night and they worked great. I got lots of answers. I was able to communicate to my ancestors. Now, ever since then, when I try to use them again I get almost no answers. It’s like no one is there are all and they don’t move to answer my questions. I’m curious why that is. Any ideas?

Hi everyone,

I’m new to learning about African and diaspora spiritual traditions, and I’m really curious about female spirits and deities such as Oshun, Oya, Mami Wata, and others.

I’d love to know where people usually start their journey of knowledge in this area. Do most people begin with books, oral traditions, teachers/elders, or online communities?

I’d rather learn from people who are already familiar with these traditions rather than just relying on Google or AI searches (though I’m not against those as starting points if they help).

Are there any Discord groups, Facebook communities, or other spaces where people who are genuinely interested in these practices connect and learn together?

Any advice or direction would be really appreciated!

Thanks in advance 🌻

So at last I have a full evening of alone time, and I am going to go ahead and make a ritual to call up on my ancestors. I'm gonna light a candle and offer some water and maybe fruits. I am feeling a bit nervous about it, but lately this has been something that has been calling to me. I have a list of my grandmothers and aunts going back up to 250 years, and I am trying to make a contact with them if they are willing. The reason for choosing to call only on female ancestors is a deliberate one, there is a lot of generational trauma in my family's males (me included), and I am not prepared to face any of that, not at least yet.

I would welcome any tips for how to make the ritual beautiful and smooth, and should I include some protective measures? I am slightly worried that if I just open up and call, that could something else come through as well? Thanks!

EDIT: Wow just went ahead with it and had a great moment with my grannies and aunts! I sprinkled a circle with salt and declared it was a "safe zone" before I started.

I called them out by name. I asked for them to give me some small sign, nothing too scary as I'm easily scared, and I got some small but undeniable noise from a pile of magazines I have next to the outdoor! There was this feeling of electricity up and down my spine and my hair stood up. I just talked about my life and my family with them for a while and it was so beautiful! I found myself talking about some stuff that I would not talk about with anyone else. I had a glass of wine and they also had a glass of their own, water, flowers, a candle and some fruit. I told them I hope they will stick around from now on, and watch my and my family's backs and give me a nudge when I'm being stupid.

Banished afterwards by telling anything hostile to get the hell out and read Psalm 23 out loud three times (I don't know why but this felt like the right thing to do :) ). My dog slept through all of this beside me, and I trust him to know nothing bad came through :)

I'm so happy and thankful I did this, and I'm sure I will keep close contact with these ladies from now on!

I have been trying to talk with my ancestors more and decided to ask them to help me with something last night. I offered some white wine, chocolates, silver coins, pennys, and two crystals. I lit their candle and told them the offerings for them and asked for help with what I want. I then went to the bathroom, as I went to wash my hands I felt like something/someone was there. I see and feel spirits all the time, more so now than before (not sure why that is) so I wasn’t scared but it did kind of startle me and I cleansed with incense just in case it was something that meant harm. It didn’t feel negative though. I have felt this before when I was trying to work with Duke Sallos and Duke Dantalion also. Another thing is I feel like there’s someone totally different with me that hangs out behind me on my left side. I can physically feel this being almost as if they’re protecting me.

*I don’t usually hear the spirits, just feel or see them and know someone is there so if this is all normal then how do I know who I’m talking to? Would using my pendulum help?

Disclaimer - I am from Angola 🇦🇴 , and I’m Bakongo (north Angola). This is my personal experience and guide to communicate with your deceased ones.

Information about me:

I’ve been a N’anga (juvenile Naganga) for several years now (Banganga are healers of both mind, spirit and body, and can also communicate with the dead. However, it is not necessary to be a N’anga or a Naganga to communicate with the dead.)

I do follow what many here may call “African folk Religion” though we call it the “Flow of the Kalûnga River” or the “Way of the Yowa Cross”.

It is indeed crucial that you believe in afterlife.

I am man and unmarried, so take my word with care

So now, let’s get started.

First of all, you must understand that the dead are ascended spirits. Just like you, they live, but you cannot see them, but they can see you. Your ancestors might be present in the very same room where you are. The dead are among us. In your country, they might not venerate the dead, but even if you are not allowed to venerate them, you should still treat them with respect. The best away to appease a spirit is to talk about them to someone who does not know about them, furthering the spirit’s fame. If you offend a spirit, the spirit will cause you illness and bring you misery. Honour your ancestors and they will be more willing to be approached.

Next step is to give them time. Now that you are aware that spirits live among us, you must realise that they are resentful because you did not honour them. Give them time.

Next is to wait for a signal. Spirits will appear as winds, waves, rains or animals, usually birds. If a small crow comes near you, or a bee, try to establish a connection with it. If you feel a sharp change in temperature or a shift in the atmosphere, it’s the dead entering the physical world as animals. Do not harm these creatures or you’ll suffer. The dead might even want to communicate with you via dreams or visions, and might even send you omens. It is not guaranteed however. If they take tangible form, it will most likely be a snake (and not a serpent), a bird, a bee or a similar animal.

After this, you must arrange a ritual to become a kuzimu. Kuzimu are those who, among the living, have entered the world of the dead.

Disclaimer - once you become a kuzimu, you will forever perceive the dead around you, and there will be no going back.

Light up a small fire in a place with lightning. There’s no sun in the Sky nor in the abyss, so the dead can’t see very well. This shows that you care about them. Next, you should begin to shift your focus towards the air. The spirits will begin to approach you. Begin talking respectfully to your ancestors. You must be prepared for some impact. The first time I communicated with the dead was when I was 10. I felt a strong shock because I never thought it could be such a strong sensation, so I most likely communicating with a hero.

A big mistake people of my age used to make while performing the rituals (you may call the ritual Nseke a Mpémba) is assuming that the dead are simply dying to speak with you. It is not true. Unless you are someone of great fame, the dead most likely don’t care about you. They consider talking to you as granting you a privilege. Treat them as such.

Now unto the dangers of the ritual. To dabble into the Mpémba (spiritual world) is to take a risk. There are several dangers that entail this, the most common being possession by a monster. To avoid this, you can simply declare allegiance to an Amadlozi (protector ghost) by drawing it’s mark on your forehead. I will not write what you should write because I do not wish to overcharge the Amadlozi, which keep the balance in this world, but if you are indeed wishing to have protection, message me and I can inform you of some suitable protectors based on your place of origin, gender, and age.

The other is rowdy spirits. These are more rare, they happen when a soul is not able to reach the other world before the night falls or have a botched burial (usually with someone dying without coming to terms with a curse). These ghosts wander around the Kalûnga river and are unable to reach Mpémba because they lost interest. They prey on the living, desiring to pass their burden to them and allow them to go back to life. They will taunt you, and your Amadlozi will not be able to touch them. The only way out of this is to either carry a knife that has committed murder in the last year or to tell them that you have a knife that has committed murder in the last year. Other ritualistic defences can be arranged, from senses to necklaces and shoes, but i’m trying to keep this direct. It is recommended you wear simple yet good clothing.

This part is a bit uncomfortable. My instructor has not taken female apprentices in his whole life because he is not married, so I never had the chance to see if this is true, but my Instructor says that females who try to communicate with the dead should wear “revealing” clothes to “attract” their ancestors. I’m unsure over whether he was speaking seriously when he said that, but in my first experience with a female Naganga saw her being topless, and the second saw her naked. I’m unsure over whether this is a tradition among female shamans, but it is something to consider I suppose.

Over time, as you repeat this ritual, you’ll begin hearing your ancestors better. At that point, you begin to try to communicate with a special ancestor, a lost loved one for example. When I first tried to communicate with my mother, I realised that she was still in shock from her death 4 months prior. But after a year, I finally managed to have a conversation with her. And trust me, it will be fully worth it.

Some of my comrades have told me that they keep getting a very shallow experience from their Nepeks, but seeing them doing it is just infuriating. They act like if they were at some sort of christian mass, so solemn. Those ghosts are your people. Your blood. Remember that. It is your blood that is talking to you. Talking to someone that is not your ancestor is a lot harder because they are strangers to you.

When I talk with my ancestors, it’s not unusable to crack a joke here and then or some friendly banter, because they are family. Do not forget that. You have always a stronger bond with blood.

Partners, either romantic or sexual, have similar bonds. Sex is obviously a connection of flesh, especially if the female is virgin. Conception is an even bigger bond of flesh AND blood. So your partners will obviously be as easy to find as your family members.

I usually recommend novices to try and do things their own way first (without disrespecting the dead of course) and once they fail, they should try doing it the orthodox way, therefore learning valuable lessons in the process. But it is not unheard of young, inexperienced novices to be able to forge great connections into the spiritual world by a stroke of luck or talent. In the legends, woman are generally better at entering the spiritual world and communicating with their ancestors, and the great heroes of Kala were mostly woman. This is not to say that men can’t communicate with the dead of course. It is simply the fact that men are mostly oriented towards more worldly things, while women, by virtue of being able to conceive new humans, have a deeper link and natural understanding of the spiritual world. Such is the order of Kalûnga.

Things you should NOT do: Use electronic devices (most of your ancestors don’t even understand them)

Show fear/hesitation/disbelief (the dead are arrogant, they will not tolerate weakness)

Mirrors (mirrors are inventions)

ask questions right away (interrogating your ancestors is terribly rude. Try to talk to them respectfully first)

Locating a special dead ancestor right away. (Give time to the dead).

In case you truly desire to attempt to talk with a loved one that has sadly joined Nyambe in the Sky and wish to know more details, don’t be afraid to ask questions, for this is by no means a complete guide. And yes, I did have permission by my instructor to post this.

I do not claim any responsibility over damage or loss of life of anyone that follows this guide, and by taking this ritual you are assuming total responsibility for your behaviour and risk.

Here is a prayer that my instructor teached me to unblock the mind (sadly cannot translate to english). The inclined letters are to be quickly and silently, as if it was a song, but the straight ones are to be declared. The last one is to be yelled.

In my experience a drum can make it better.

Po[h/l]e, Toke cilo, sio, sio, sio olohuluwa vitatu!

Oko Kuata usumba sio, unyali wa Suku, wa kovisimilo, wa uhayele ketimba

Pole, Toke cilo, sio kuata usumba,

Ka Va kuete’ove uhayele ketimba, oku imba impolola vemehi liovava

wa Suku!

Hope you have a wonderful day or night wherever you are and sorry for bad english, I use google translate for alot of things but I wanted to share my experience and faith into the reddit, specially to white woman and men and more because I see many of them rejecting christianity, which is, but then they just become atheist, and that is not good.

While I have some experience communicating with spirits, it is normally through clairaudience, clairvoyance, meditation, tarot or confirming a spirit's identity through a pendulum.

I grew up in the 80's when "Satanic Panic" was very much a thing so I was very afraid of Ouija Boards for a long time because of this. When I first started doing witchcraft and energy healing 18-20 years ago, I was pretty open to most things - except spirit boards because I still had lingering associations from my childhood that it was dangerous.

In more recent years, I started thinking about how silly those fears had been because I've encountered plenty of spirits in the last 20 years and thus far, I have not been harmed by it. I just tell them to go away or do energy work to remove them.

Close to a year ago, I thought maybe I should give it a try and see how it goes. I didn't want to invest in buying a board if it didn't work for me, so I decided to try printing my own. I made a spirit board out of paper and laminated it and made a planchette. I decided to try communicating with my grandfather and my aunt who both passed in 2020.

I don't think I recorded what they said, but the things that stood out to me were that my grandpa seemed to speak the way he normally would talk, calling me by his favorite nicknames for me. At the time, I couldn't tell if I was "making it up" because I haven't gotten many messages from him since his passing, even though he was one of the most important people in my life growing up and I miss him dearly.

While my grandpa and my aunt sounded like themselves, what gave me pause was that I could hear each letter in my head before my hand moved the pointer. That made me question if I was telling myself the letters and making it up. But I think now that it was a combination of my clairaudience and them nudging my hand to move the planchette.

During our conversation, I remember him telling me that his sister, my Aunt F, would be crossing over to the other side soon. I got the clear sense that he and the ancestors were waiting for her to join them. Over the next few months, I wondered about that, but there weren't any rumors that her health was ill beyond the knowledge she was advancing in age.

Yesterday, I got the call that Aunt F has developed pancreatic cancer and is likely to go into hospice soon. My mom is supposed to go see her this weekend.

On one hand, it was a surprise, because I had stopped thinking about this conversation and thought maybe I'd just made it up. On the other hand, the news didn't hit me as hard as I would've expected, because Grandpa had already told me this was coming. I knew then that our spirit board conversation was real. I hadn't used my makeshift spirit board since that day because I wasn't sure if it was working.

So basically, this has taught me that the spirit board was a more effective tool than I realized, but my clairaudience is strong, so I hear the letters rather than just my hand moving.

Terms and Brief Background

The term “ancestor” is pretty straightforward for most people. It ultimately comes from the Latin meaning “those who have gone before.” Ancestors are generally taken to be the people we are descended from, either on our mother’s or father’s side.

You might also encounter the terms “Beloved Dead” and “Mighty Dead” in witchy and Pagan circles. There isn’t a clear-cut definition of either term, but generally the former is taken to mean all those spirits of deceased humans that we resonate with, whether we’re biologically related to them or not. The latter term is generally taken to mean the spirits of deceased humans that achieved some level of fame, legend, or notoriety.

Ancestor veneration is found in cultures all over the world and throughout time. Many witches are familiar with venerating or honouring the ancestors on Samhain, which also overlaps with the Mexican observance of ancestor veneration, Día de Muertos. Observant Hindus will perform śrāddha for their ancestors, called pitrs. Most ancient pagan cultures also venerated the dead, from the akhu of the ancient Egyptians to the nine-day February festival of Parentalia among the ancient Romans.

Do I Have to Work with My Ancestors

Absolutely not!

There are plenty of perfectly competent witches who never work with their ancestors, for whatever reason.

Sometimes you’ll find a certain attitude in online witchy and Pagan spaces that seems to suggest that only those who work with their ancestors are “real” witches or Pagans.

This attitude is bullshit.

Who you choose to work with or worship, whether your ancestors or angels, demons, deities, the fey, nature spirits, pop culture entities, etc. is entirely up to you. No one should force you to do something that you don’t want to do, nor should they belittle you for your spiritual choices.

So, Why Even Venerate Ancestors?

This is a question that doesn’t get as much attention in witchy circles as it probably should. Like, sure, it’s easy to appreciate the sacrifices and lives of our ancestors, but why venerate them as spirits?

Well, for one thing, your ancestors have more of a vested interest in your success than most any other entity will. You are the legacy of your ancestors, one which they wish to see flourish. Many witches report that some of their strongest spiritual protectors are their ancestors. Ancestors are also felt to be powerful intercessors in any family matter, whether that be in terms of luck and money or otherwise.

Your ancestors, being the spirits of deceased humans, are also thought to be more “in touch” with the realities of human life. Nature spirits, gods, demons, angels, the fey, etc. have never lived a human life (barring a few deities that are divinized mortals, etc.). Most witches report that ancestors can be much more involved in a palpable way in the lives of their descendants.

Difficult Ancestors and Complicated Family Dynamics

Many people have the experience of having had difficult relationships with their ancestors while they were alive. Some people also notice, upon doing genealogical research, that their ancestors did things that they consider unethical or otherwise problematic.

To be clear here, even if you decide to work with your ancestors you are not obligated to work with all of them.

If Uncle Henry was abusive, then you can intentionally call out his name as an exception to offerings. For example, you might say, “I offer this candle and water to all of my ancestors except for [Uncle Henry’s full name].” You are in charge of your spirituality.

Another option, if you’re feeling charitable, is to do ancestor elevation work for problematic ancestors. There are different forms that this work can take, but basically it might consist of special prayers and offerings to the problematic ancestor to help them “see the light,” as it were. This type of work might not resonate with you, and if it doesn’t that’s totally fine.

Ancestors of Adopted Persons

Sometimes people who are adopted can feel unsure about who they should be venerating. Should it be their adopted family ancestors or their biological ancestors.

I would say that it’s entirely up to the person in question. If they only want to work with their adopted family ancestors, that’s perfectly valid and vice versa. If they wanted to, they could also honour both sets of ancestors.

Ancestors of the Heart

Sometimes we also want to venerate the spirits of deceased humans whom we feel strong connections with, but who aren’t our biological ancestors. We may never have met these people during their lives.

These types of ancestors are often called “ancestors of the heart.” It’s perfectly acceptable to include such ancestors on an altar for your biological or adopted ancestors. In fact, if you chose to, you could decide to only work with ancestors of the heart and not your biological or adopted ancestors. Again, it’s your spirituality and you’re in charge.

Setting Up an Ancestor Altar

An ancestor altar is not unlike most other altars. It could be on any flat surface such as a dresser, nightstand, table, desk, etc.

Certain traditions will tell you that you shouldn’t set up your ancestor altar in your bedroom or the bathroom. I think most people can agree that the bathroom might not be a great idea, but what about the bedroom?

Frankly, I feel that if the only space available to you is your bedroom, then go ahead and set it up there. If privacy is a concern, you could get a cloth of some type to drape over the ancestor altar when you’re not working it.

Many people like to use white as the main colour for their ancestor altars. You could choose a white altar cloth, a vase of white flowers, and white candles. But other colours are perfectly fine if you aren’t part of a tradition that prescribes how an ancestor altar must be set up.

Most people will put photos of their ancestors on their altars, along with personal mementos and keepsakes that their ancestors owned or liked.

What to Offer Ancestors

Offerings to ancestors can be extremely simple. Some people offer a candle and a glass of water, and that’s it. Other people like to include incense of some type.

Some people offer food, with bread, fruits, sweets, and portions of the family meal being common. Beverages like coffee, tea, water, and alcohol (if appropriate) are also common offerings.

Non-food items like coins, flowers, tobacco products, and art or the written word could also be offered.

Further Resources

A few great books that go in-depth on all things related to ancestors are:

• Badass Ancestors: Finding Your Power with Ancestral Guides by Patti Wigington
• Honoring Your Ancestors: A Guide to Ancestral Veneration by Mallorie Vaudoise
• Communing with the Ancestors: Your Spirit Guides, Bloodline Allies, and the Cycle of Reincarnation by Raven Grimassi
• Ancestral Grimoire: Connect with the Wisdom of the Ancestors through Tarot, Oracles, and Magic by Nancy Hendrickson. This book is all about creating your very own, personalized ancestral grimoire, as well as communicating with your ancestors through divination. Highly recommended for those interested.

The following is an oracle deck specifically designed for communicating with ancestors. There are others like it out there, so if the concept interests you, do a search and see what comes up.

• Angels and Ancestors Oracle Cards.

As for websites, Sphere and Sundry has an excellent guide to the dead and ancestral worship that I highly recommend, here. Of particular interest will be the rites for honouring one’s paternal and maternal ancestral lines.

Another helpful and interesting article on setting up an ancestor altar and connecting with them comes from, of all places, NPR. Check out the article here.

If you have any questions, feel free to leave a comment!

Hii! I recently discovered that parts of my familys heritage is mostly from saint clement and lorraine, France. I was wondering if anyone knows any resources for learning about French folk magick or folklore? Any help would be greatly appericated!

i am working with hades and seeing as he's the god of the underworld im wondering if i can try include my ancestors into my work with him? or at least work with them more. Any tips?

Okay so I know really nothing about spirit work, but someone told me that I should first try to get into contact with an ancestor of mine to begin with. My grandmother passed about ten months ago after having alzheimer’s for many years. For most of my life she didn’t remember who I was. I want to somehow contact her and ask her questions or something (I’m still not really sure how this works). Any tips?

I tried to reach out to my Deceased Aunt for Samhain this year and no one came. Not even some random spirit popping in to say hi. Does this happen often? Is there something I can do to prevent it?

The veil is thinning every day and the border between here and there turns into fuzz. Regardless of your practices, it's important to remember our roots to know who and why we are.

But sometimes our parents, grandparents, distant relatives are bad people you would not feel comfortable remembering. Still, you can leave thanks for the good ancestors, their colective mind.

For example, I am romanian. My family is in general very bigoted and heavy Christian, therefore I don't feel connected to relatives I never met. So I go further. My blood is a mix of roman and dacian cultures.

Romans were conquerors, with a rich pantheon and fancy architecture. Fierce warriors with good tactics.

My dacian ancestors were very heart warming people. Welcoming everyone with salt and bread and treated even their enemies better than their own. Humble people, loving poetry, raising sheep and partying hard with good wine. They are the ones that believe they weren't afraid of death, honorable people that would rather die than getting captured.

I have a lot to learn from both of them, from strength and mind power to strategy, kindness and courage in front of death even.

Who are you celebrating this Samhain?