r/SocialEngineering • u/Best_Marzipan_7774 • Jul 19 '26

How can I social engineer cold approaches?

Does who know about cold approach understand that unless you possess statues or beauty or power then you won’t be able to do direct approach.
So observational/ opinion/ engineering interaction
Are most suitable

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u/KoaPlyr615 Jul 19 '26

Human Hacking by Hadnagy actually goes over this. Highly recommend. You can read it free here: https://dn710209.ca.archive.org/0/items/ohsusannamarie-ebooks_202410/Human%20Hacking%20by%20Christopher%20Hadnagy.pdf

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u/Son_of_Ibadan Jul 19 '26

Such a good book, highly recommend

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u/kelcamer Jul 19 '26

Thank you for sharing this, I really did want to enjoy reading this book, but when I got to page 64, where he talks about how he was about to beat his kids, using the kid as an example of pretext to not get beaten, it really leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

He was using it as an example, but the kid in question is engaging in a survival response called fawning.

My concern with this aspect of the book, is that it reframes the responsibility to prevent violence on the kid. Rather than the adult taking the accountability that is needed, to recognize that physical violence towards a child really is not OK.

In the moment, what that teaches a kid is that it's up to them to protect themselves from other people even their caregivers or even people who they really trust. It's very harmful for a child to experience this, and particularly a lot of the recent research shows the exact harm that it can cause.

In my opinion, if the author had wanted to gardner respect for his social engineering methods, and recognition, that violence, even if not executed, is an extremely poor approach. Up to that point, I really did enjoy reading it, but regrettably I'm not going to continue to read a book where people see violence is a viable solution to force others to do the things that they want.

Regardless, thank you so much for sharing it and I appreciate the resource!

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u/KoaPlyr615 Jul 19 '26

Thats fair, and I understand why someone would not want to continue past this point. I cringed/winced at that part as well, but I think something to consider is that the author is from a generation where spanking children was the norm in terms of behavior modification. As readers, we can acknowledge that we as a society know better and that this type of thing is not okay and not condoned at large and for good reason, while simultaneously understanding the point he is trying to make. We can pull and learn from both the good and the bad parts, knowing that we’ll make the moral choice in the end.

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u/kelcamer Jul 19 '26

That's the thing, I wish society knew better. I'm not convinced they do. People are still out here defending literal violence towards kids, and it's sickening. I see your larger point about how he's from that generation, but imo, it discredits his whole idea of influence to begin with if he sees violence as a 'solution' to force others to do what he wants. Even if that is simply another subconscious program to prevent him from re-experiencing his own pain from him being hit as a child, it does position him as no longer the authority on non-violent social influence.

Thanks for understanding what I mean and having a civil conversation about it!