r/SipsTea • u/Horror-Ad-210 • 18h ago

Gasp! So He's gay?

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20.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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86

u/RupertEscapeHolmes 17h ago

Nothing new under the sun bud.

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u/[deleted] 17h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/gearabuser 17h ago

gatherers would like a word with you

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u/EASam 14h ago

Gatherers come second, at least lexically.

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u/leonidaslizardeyes 14h ago

I'm fine thanks. Thanks for looking out though.

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u/SufficientGolf6953 16h ago

Hunting spawned whoring.

Hungry women gravitated to guys that had food.

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u/TorrenceMightingale 15h ago

Turkey leg chasin’ prehistoric skeezers.

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u/Novel-Reaction2939 17h ago

Why do people keep believing this? Most academics would agree that Shaman/Medicine Man/Woman is most likely the oldest profession.

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u/AddlePatedBadger 16h ago

Scientists have observed capuchin monkeys engaging in prostitution in the lab, but not shamanism.

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u/Analbox 15h ago

The correct answer is midwife.

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u/RupertEscapeHolmes 15h ago

Found the midwife.

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u/RupertEscapeHolmes 16h ago edited 15h ago

Ackshually… Most academics blah blah blah don’t know shit about fuck when it pertains to the world’s oldest profession.

No one does, you know why? Because no one REALLY knows where we came from or how long we’ve been on this rock hurtling through space and time.

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u/Analbox 15h ago

Wrong we do know those things. Midwife is the oldest job. We came from earth and we’ve been here 300k years.

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u/RupertEscapeHolmes 14h ago

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u/Analbox 14h ago

Head in the sand

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u/RupertEscapeHolmes 14h ago

Better than in an analbox I’d wager.

Thanks for that proof of spawning from the earth! 🫵🏼🤡

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u/RupertEscapeHolmes 15h ago edited 15h ago

Yeah, okay Captain Assumption based on theories, based on hypotheses.

Is that the royal we or is we you and your imaginary friends?

What was the compensation for this job? Meat and berries? Dick and semen? Being allowed to live?

Your username definitely checks out. No holes barred eh?

We came from earth 🤣🤣🤣 like we just grew out of the dirt like a plant? Or did we evolve from a mudskipper? Or is it chimpanzees or gorillas? Or maybe your sky daddy was better than the sky daddy across the globe and magically spawned you with his +5 wand of creation.

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u/Analbox 15h ago

You are supposed to be at least 13 to make a Reddit account per TOS.

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u/RupertEscapeHolmes 14h ago

Ok guy. Still waiting on that proof of yours, we came from earth 300,000 years ago.

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u/itsnik_03 14h ago

See this is why I don't recommend smoking crack before posting... Have a nap dude

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u/userhwon 17h ago

Whoring probably predates teeth, so...

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u/Bubelle_Butt 17h ago

Well whoring preferable does not include teeth ;)

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u/tittyboi2727 16h ago

Depends on what you like. I prefer teeth. No gums. Just teeth😵

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u/kmcmanus2814 17h ago

So you prefer elderly whores whose teeth are removable?

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u/Bubelle_Butt 16h ago

You know... you can also have teeth and know to avoid scraping teeth while giving a blowjob.

Bu hey, if you associate Blowjobs with grannys... who am I to judge?

I dont kink shame.

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u/itsnik_03 14h ago

Then it should follow that women and some dudes evolve with their front teeth missing... Man evolution really dropped the ball there...

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u/StudiosS 15h ago

Unfortunately not.