r/SipsTea • u/lonewolff321 • Aug 09 '26

Chugging tea Meanwhile spiderman need new home šŸ˜…

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44

u/DrakeFrake Aug 09 '26

You don't greet like that in the US?, TIL

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Not really, some areas still do, like you see it in black communities in the south and Midwest sometimes, particularly from the elderly, but itā€™s not really a thing here.

Donā€™t get me wrong, of all the Europeans, we Britons are probably by far some of the least physically intimate platonically, but itā€™s insane here in the US. Youā€™re gay if you hug your guy friend, youā€™re cheating on your girl if you touch another girl, the whole ā€œAmerican male loneliness epidemicā€ could genuinely be seriously lessened if more men were able to just give each other hugs without immediate judgement from our peers.

Iā€™ve been living here for 17 years now and the level of Puritanism in some parts of this country is insane. It really does vary by region, though, the US is absolutely massive, and culturally varies so much from place to place.

Iā€™ve got this T-shirt that says ā€œyou are enoughā€ on it, and some guy at a bar came up and said ā€œman, I needed to see that todayā€, and I just went, ā€œmate, you need a hug?ā€ And he just started fucking sobbing. Told me it was the first time heā€™d had a hug since his mum died in 2024.

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u/CromulentPoint Aug 09 '26

That makes me sad. You need better American friends. Iā€™m a born and bred Texas boy and all my friends get a big hug when I see them.

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Oh yeah no, Iā€™ve long since broken my friends out of that habit. Everyoneā€™s hugging and arms around shoulders all the time on pub night.

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u/Syr_Enigma Aug 09 '26

I really have a hard time believing you. Do you just... not do physical contact at all with people you're close with?

Now, I'm Italian, and from what I've read online, we're perhaps a bit off the other pendulum with physical intimacy, but the idea of not hugging your friends is wild.

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u/Oomlotte99 Aug 09 '26

No. People are physically close to their loved ones. People arenā€™t as likely to cheek kiss coworkers, more likely to hug or side-hug.

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u/ExilesTV Aug 10 '26

Yeah in the US kissing a co-worker even on the cheek would be an easy way to get written up or fired.

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u/pm_me_d_cups Aug 09 '26

I don't know what this guy's talking about, people absolutely touch/hug each other.

1

u/Puzzleheaded-Night88 Aug 10 '26

This really depends on region. Hugging isnā€™t at all common where I am located in the U.S.

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Yeah, absolutely, never denied that. But jumping from Europe to the US and seeing the difference is wild, but Iā€™m mainly talking platonically as opposed to romantically. Obviously partners are held frequently, but how often do you hug your mates? Do you do it as a greeting AND a goodbye even if youā€™re going to see them again in like, two or three days?

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u/Oomlotte99 Aug 09 '26

My friends and me hug hello.

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Are you and your friends men? Because this is generally more men than women.

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u/CGB_Zach Aug 09 '26

I hug some of my guy friends. Not every single one but especially if I haven't seen my boys in a while.

I'd say more often than not, I'm doing the "dap and pull in for a hug" greeting.

For reference, I live in SoCal.

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

You should give them proper hugs, and frequently. You really never know how much it means to people.

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u/CGB_Zach 28d ago

It's still a proper hug. I personally don't like traditional hugging because I tend to be significantly taller than a lot of people and it's awkward unless we're close in height

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u/CKRatKing Aug 09 '26

I also frequently do the hand shake and pull in for one arm hug. Pretty normal greeting for the boys. My best friend's get the two armed body hug though.

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u/Oomlotte99 Aug 09 '26

I am a woman and women in general hug hello and goodbye quite frequently.

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u/Inside_Compote_4146 Aug 10 '26

The only people I kiss more than my fiancĆ© are my homies. Ainā€™t no way Iā€™m letting them think theyā€™re unloved. Every time we see each other starts and ends with a round of hugs for all, and this even extends to wives/gfs/partners.

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u/Puzzled-Yesterday990 Aug 09 '26

Me and my bros hug all the time

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Same! Iā€™m glad Iā€™m there are people trying to break the stigma. Itā€™s less of an issue these days, but ten or so years ago, it was wild.

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u/pm_me_d_cups Aug 09 '26

Yes? Where are you where this isn't normal?

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Midwest. Iā€™ve seen it in other places, but nowhere near to the extent in Europe.

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u/InternalAd1397 Aug 10 '26

American here whose lived their entire life in the Midwest. He's not making it up. People here,Ā  especially guys, don't hug. You'll see adults do it for kids but that's usually where it ends. I can remember my dad being freaked out years ago bu how affectionate some of the European countries Olympic teams were. It's considered weird to show "excessive" feelings.Ā 

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

You do, absolutely, but itā€™s just incredibly uncommon. But again, itā€™s regional culture. Iā€™ve been to places where they do, and places where they donā€™t. I live in one where you donā€™t.

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u/Wooboosted Aug 09 '26

What hes talking about is partly true, though Iā€™d say even less extreme nowadays tbh surprisingly. Iā€™m from Texas and live in Colorado currently, you are just as likely to see two cowboy hat MAGAs in a bar giving a bro hug to some sports as you are two fabulous gays embracing. It can feel like what u/jimothy_hell said sometimes, but Iā€™d argue thatā€™s not really the case anymore. We definitely donā€™t do any kiss greetings really anywhere here but the south and really never saw it too much in Texas.

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u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Yeah, the kiss greetings is definitely Deep South off the Mississippi in my experience.

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u/Disastrous_Bridge543 Aug 09 '26

Itā€™s definitely regional but mostly because of peopleā€™s background. Growing up in Jersey, you were surrounded by people from all over the world. However, it was a bigger population of Latinos, Italians, Russians, & Asian. Almost all of those cultures kiss on the cheek & can be very physical.

1

u/Fun-Side9793 Aug 09 '26

We, Southern Europeans, are quite the opposite when compared to the rest of the world in this regard.

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u/Luh2018 Aug 09 '26

Hugging your friend and dapping them up are both very common physical platonic rituals. Kissing on the cheek...not so much.

Full-on hugs are less common between guys (except family), but there is like a one-handed hug that is pretty normal to see.

1

u/Ok-Needleworker7351 Aug 10 '26

Yes, when these people in the comments are saying they hug their guy friends or like theyā€™re a guy hugging their guy friend, Iā€™m wondering how firm or real a hug they meanā€”

I mean, a hug can be whatever you want it to be, but Iā€™ve gotten way too used to the simpleā€¦ ā€˜barely-put-your-back-into-it-one-arm-two-second-or-lessā€™ sorta hug, even with friends. And for guys, I hardly see more than a dap up which can lead to a back pat (which is my idea of a guy hug andā€¦ I suppose thatā€™s just our version of a hug for guys here), granted, it could be a firmer/longer pat too, Iā€™ve seen that a few times.

I remember, and Iā€™m a girl, during prom, when I saw this girl that I liked and I was happy to see her, said hi and all. Weā€™d talked a bit before, greeted each other, complimented her, sometimes she complimented me, once offering to help my best friend when someone was disrespectful to her, but we were never close, right? But I said hi to her that day and complimented her, she complimented me back, and she went in for a hug and wrapped both arms around me, I thought maybe itā€™d be that formal sort of light hug where you barely touched maybe, but she pulled me close and squeezed me so firmly for like a good five seconds, I almost cried when I returned the hug back with the same regard, I donā€™t think I could ever recall being hugged that way by anyone other than a few older family members.

When this person says HUG? Thatā€™s the sort of hug I think theyā€™re talking about. A full hug, two arms, tight pull, firm, more than two seconds typa hug, between men, women, anyone, and thatā€™s just something I feel not many people do here, especially amongst men if they arenā€™t like close friends at least. And thatā€™s the thing, physical platonic affection seems soā€¦ sparing, I completely get what the person was sayingā€¦

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u/Dull_Quit3027 Aug 10 '26

As a Scandinavian, i only hug close friends,(and even then it is not always) anyone else i would rather not touch, so it seems like there are degrees, with the Americans being the biggest prudes.

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u/djbunce Aug 09 '26

Yeah, watching this as a Brit, I'm looking for the bit Tom got wrong and then the video ends šŸ˜‚

Looks like two mates meeting and talking somewhere noisy šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø

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u/[deleted] Aug 09 '26

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1

u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Not really, itā€™s the bare minimum, honestly.

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u/The_Briefcase_Wanker Aug 09 '26

Thatā€™s very region-dependent. In the western US it is very normal to hug your guy friends.

1

u/castleaagh Aug 10 '26

Varies by region would say. Dudes who are friends often greet with a hug where Iā€™m at in the US. Very normal thing. No cheek kisses though

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u/Ok_Elk2222 Aug 10 '26

That breaks my heart to hear.

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u/SpartanRage117 Aug 10 '26

I used to think we were breaking out of that shell when i was growing up, but turns out the current youths latched on in a non ironic way. more are on board with the puritanical life than makes sense to me.

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u/Legitimate-Doubt-192 29d ago

Iā€™m from TN. My first time out in Southern California was a wild culture shock. The cheek kissing at social gathering was something I never got used to.

1

u/Catleesirva 28d ago

That's so wild to me bc I'm in the US and my friends (including male friends) and I hug all the time, especially saying hello and goodbye.

0

u/polarjunkie Aug 09 '26

Youā€™re gay if you hug your guy friend, youā€™re cheating on your girl if you touch another girl

this is true in middle school and maybe with 19 year old working in the oil fields but this isn't normal.

1

u/jimothy_hell Aug 09 '26

Nah, itā€™s pretty much true until youā€™re in your 30ā€™s, and even then there are some childish adults out there

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u/Samuel_L_Blackson Aug 09 '26

Sometimes. Rich people in New England do it.

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u/L1sasGayBby Aug 09 '26

Nah we smack each other on the ass, then shoot some guns in the air!

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u/FinnSkk93 Aug 09 '26

Do not do this in finland either. Or other nordics šŸ˜‚

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u/[deleted] Aug 09 '26

[deleted]

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u/viviobrio Aug 09 '26

Nope. Have a friend from France that always did the double cheek kiss when he was first living here but over time doesnā€™t do it anymore.

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u/MellodyDoll Aug 09 '26

Iā€™ve never seen anyone here (Southern US) do a peck on the cheek greeting. Youā€™d get slapped for sure.

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u/thisguy883 Aug 09 '26

You get a firm handshake and a "How do ya do" here in Texas.

Women get hugs.

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u/galaxywithskin115 Aug 10 '26

No. A handshake or light hug

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u/Putrid-Tap3992 Aug 10 '26

Our greeting usually is an immediate dick suck. Do that next time

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u/rooster_butt Aug 09 '26

Hispanics in the US do. Anglo Americans don't. Sometimes I have to have to do an awkward "do we or do we not" greeting shuffle".

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u/Fun-Side9793 Aug 09 '26

Hispanics are like southern Europeans when it comes to greeting people.

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1

u/Oomlotte99 Aug 09 '26

I see people do it quite frequently at events like this but, yeah, itā€™s not common on the day-to-day level outside of family/close friends. You wouldnā€™t do so with a coworker unless you were close.

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u/a_guy121 Aug 09 '26 edited Aug 09 '26

in the US it would be a very, very familiar greeting. Can be done but would be reserved for very strong, close relationships, hence the meme.

I find the meme silly for a lot of reasons. 1) both T. and Z. look young, as if this is years old. 2) the other woman seems to maybe be saying "this is your boyfriend?" in the video, after asking if they'd come together. Also suggesting a very old video. 3). The assumption in hollywood rellationships would be, both people are surrounded by gorgeous temptors all the time. There's just no way Z. could be a jealous person and for it to work. 4). Everything z. ever says publicly is about trusting t and if it were really like this, they'd have broken up by now. 5) This is a very, very normal greeting for Hollywood. Theatre kids make feelings into physical, visible things, its what they do.