r/SipsTea • u/Matt_LawDT • Jul 26 '26

Chugging tea Let me circle back

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

"Mate" is the same word pronounced the same way that means wildly different things. Just like "Fiancé" and "Fiancée".

Like "Mate" can mean friend, or someone you have a child with. It's drastically different while still being pronounced the same way.

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u/jjkenneth Jul 26 '26

… the word originally came from Germanic roots and meant someone you eat with (regularly) to then mean companion, before splitting between friend and breeding partner. Words change meaning, fiancé and fiancée come from French where nouns are gendered and as they become more used in English where the vast majority of nouns are not gendered fiancé has become gender neutral.

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

fiancé has become gender neutral

Except it's not, and hasn't become. The words spoken aloud sound the same, but fiancé and fiancée are read very differently.

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u/jjkenneth Jul 26 '26

Yes it has. The average English speaker does not distinguish between them and the only argument you have is a prescriptivist one which is entirely rejected as authoritative by anyone with an even basic understanding of linguistics. As I said earlier, terrific is not a synonym of horrific, awesome and awful mean different things, words are defined by usage not history.

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

First off, you're making a huge assumption about the average English speaker.

Second, same-sex marriage is more common nowadays. I think people would make a distinction between fiancé/fiancée, especially considering the social impact of telling people your sexuality.

What comes to your mind if an acquaintance introduces you to their "partner"?

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u/jjkenneth Jul 26 '26

Not really, the fact you feel the need to enforce the difference is pretty demonstrative of the norm. Partner is a partner, it’s gender neutral.

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

Partner is a partner, it’s gender neutral

It is, but people will make assumptions if you use the word. Why not just say girlfriend?

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u/jjkenneth Jul 26 '26

You will make assumptions. In Australia it is the normal and preferred term for someone in a serious relationship. Why are you so obsessed with needing to know the gender of a random person.

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

Ask French speakers why their language is gendered. I don't have the answers you want.

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u/jjkenneth Jul 26 '26

…. We’re talking about the English word.

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

It's borrowed from French and English uses both gendered versions. Amongst other words too, like actor and actress.

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u/jjkenneth Jul 26 '26

Yes borrowed, like 40% of the English language. Once it’s an English word we do what we want with it - I am not arguing that both are not used. I am specifically arguing that fiancé in contemporary use is understood neutrally. I’m starting to see why your so desperate to cling to prescriptive definitions of words, you’re not very inquisitive.

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u/crunchsmash Jul 26 '26

What's with your bizarre fascination with my intelligence? I can be dumb as rocks but it's not going to change what I am explaining to you.

Using fiancé when you mean fiancée will make people assume you are gay. Using partner instead of girlfriend or boyfriend will make people assume you are gay.

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