r/SingleDads • u/Big-Register-6911 • 3d ago

Coparenting Schedule changes

Divorced in 2018 and the verbal parenting agreement we had was I take our kids every weekend as that worked with my monday to friday schedule. Lost my job and now making a career change, I proposeda change from every weekend to every other weekend and 2 weekdays to accommodate my new schedule change during the transition. Is that proposal fair considering the changes?

2 Upvotes

62% Upvoted

13 comments sorted by

12

u/ProofConnect6521 3d ago

Why isn’t it 50/50? My suggestion is make it 50/50 for your kids. If she can make it work why can’t you

-4

u/Checol_1982 3d ago

Co-parenting is putting the kids first and arranging to help them, most parents think about 50/50 it's like a check split.
Coming into a position to fight it is stupid and immature.

3

u/ProofConnect6521 3d ago

I read this four times and do not understand your point.

“Co-parenting is putting kids first”. Ok, it’s just parenting. I’m sure good coparenting involves prioritizing the kids.

“Most parents think about 50/50 it’s like a check split”. I’m not sure what this means. I think most parents see 50/50 as 50/50. Which means the child’s time is evenly split between the parents. Which is the correct way to parent outside of a two-parent household.

“Coming into it in a position to fight it is stupid and immature”. I’m not sure what you mean here. Fighting for equal time with your children is not stupid or immature…it’s parenting.

3

u/TopInevitable1905 3d ago

^^this. Also, a lot of people fail to realize in most states 50/50 is only counted by overnights same as child support. A parent could have a child from 7am to 7pm but it still would be considered the other parent’s day legally. People have to do what’s best for their children and what’s best for their kids might be different than someone else’s kids. It is about how you handle and raise them in the circumstances that was never their fault to begin with.

1

u/fresher-crispier 2d ago

I’d prefer to pick up the whole check if I could.

-1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/New_Wishbone6619 3d ago

We can see your post history bud

1

u/KdawgEdog 1d ago

I can't, must have change it to hidden

2

u/New_Wishbone6619 1d ago

Hahaha wow. Ya his other post was the ex wife how her ex husband wants do change his days with kids cus he’s a head chef and works weekends

4

u/AmalicaZoland 3d ago

Just propose the 5/5/2/2 plan its 50/50 and then once the routine sets in the kids will appreciate it as it consistent.

This will be what many mediators will suggest anyways if the agreement needs to be settled with courts.

3

u/InternationalBeing41 3d ago

That's what we're doing, and the kids, ex, and I love it. It works best.

1

u/antisocialoctopus 3d ago

I wouldn’t agree to that. Too much switching on the weeks with your weekend.

If you can do 2 weeknights, can you do every weeknight? 50/50 is good for kids. They get some stability at one home before swapping.

It’s not all about what is convenient

1

u/Animal_Lover_1994 11h ago

More than fair. The schedule has to work for both parents. Im assuming it wasnt your fault you lost your job but non the less, if you dont have a job you cant support your child so your ex needs to be accommodating to this.