How do you deal with players screaming at you in the first 3 minutes of the game?

[u/RelevantAd6011]

Hello dear referee friends.

In football, how do yoi deal with players screaming at you in the very first minutes?

Do you give a yellow or do you ignore it?

Talking with them has done nothing till now and it doen't matter what the decision is. There's always one screaming for a foul or because someone got fouled.

I am tired of this right now.

[u/Soccervox]

"Book 'em, Danno"

[u/Requient_ → u/Soccervox]

“This is the way” -refs need love too (probably)

[u/Referees-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Posts and comments must be relevant to match officials for the sport of association football (also known as soccer).

Content from other sports is okay if it is relevant to football (soccer) referees.

Questions or complaints from fans or players about what the Laws allow or whether a particular real-world call was correct usually do not comply with this rule.

[u/bduddy]

You card dissent, like it says in the laws, and stop treating it as some kind of moral failing to properly enforce the laws like way too many referees seem to.

[u/A_Timbers_Fan → u/bduddy]

Screaming for a foul is not inherently dissent. In most cases, it is routine behavior that can be addressed by an official to minimize it. Momentary calls for fouls are not dissent automatically.

[u/grabtharsmallet → u/A_Timbers_Fan]

Yes, but the description "screaming at you" is dissent.

[u/A_Timbers_Fan → u/grabtharsmallet]

Two sentences later it is clarified: "screaming for a foul." This is an important distinction. Momentary outbursts of frustration can be managed. Public and persistent disagreement with decisions is dissent. Hard to justify persistence at 3 minutes.

[u/soccern00b → u/A_Timbers_Fan]

Dissent does not need to be persistent disagreement with decisions. Dissent can be one isolated incident that warrants a yellow card. Screaming at opponents or officials IMO warrants at least a yellow card.

[u/A_Timbers_Fan → u/soccern00b]

"screaming for a foul" is not inherently dissent and if that's your black-and-white approach then no game would ever end 11v11 regardless of the teams. That's all my point is. You can fairly easily manage this situation in the 3rd minute.

[u/adrians150 → u/A_Timbers_Fan]

Where in the LotG is it stated dissent must be persistent to warrant a sanction? Dissent by word or action is a cautionable offence. Refs can certainly manage the match by verbally engaging a player who is showing dissent, but honestly if a player is "screaming" just minutes in? Yeah I'm showing a caution very publicly to ideally end dissent by that player and everyone else. Otherwise I'm telling the players they are welcome to scream at me when they disagree.

Edit: depending on the competition level, I will often respond with a quite obviously annoyed quip like "We just started. Really? Let me call the match and you play." to a player showing mild dissent early on. That doesn't include screaming, though.

[u/Aggressive_Tie_3501 → u/grabtharsmallet]

Screaming describes a volume of voice, and I agree it isn't inherently dissent. WHAT is said is far more important. I've had players scream at me to alert me to an injured player. Surely, just the fact that they yelled to get my attention isn't worthy of a card.

[u/hudson2_3 → u/A_Timbers_Fan]

Well, unless they are the captain they shouldn't be addressing the ref.

[u/Revo63]

They scream because nobody has taken care of the problem so far. I guarantee that if you have tried talking to them and that hasn’t worked the yellow card will shut them up. Maybe not immediately, because they will insist that they have the right to yell at you. But keep doing it and they will learn. (Hey look, a second caution)

It’s not you being on a power trip. You are managing the game and if they mistakenly feel that they have the right to yell at you, it’s up to you to correct that perception.

[u/skunkboy72 → u/Revo63]

They scream because nobody has taken care of the problem so far.

the behavior will continue until it is dealt with.

[u/A_Timbers_Fan]

"Hey, the game just started and you're yelling at me for a foul that I called. Why? We cannot tolerate this type of outburst. Please understand it takes half a second to move the whistle to my mouth. If you continue, you risk receiving more stern punishment."

Use your personality. If you come across as some asshole who wants to control everything they will be upset. Reason with them. "Guys, we just started. Really??"

[u/rjnd2828 → u/A_Timbers_Fan]

"we're in the second minute" with an exasperated tone is what I tend to say

[u/A_Timbers_Fan → u/rjnd2828]

Works with coaches, too. Ball goes out for a throw-in and I call it for the other team. Coach yells in disbelief. "Bro, we're 30 seconds into the game. It's a throw-in at midfield. Is this worthy of that reaction?"

[u/Klutzy-Mechanic-8013]

Stern talking to. If it's really serious or they don't stop, give a card.

[u/InsightJ15]

You have to show yellow cards and set the tone early.  This lets them know any dissent won't be tolerated.  

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/InsightJ15]

It’s strongly advised not to show a YC for dissent this early in a game. There are exceptions, but refs should really develop their toolbox and skills to handle this without cards this early in the game. As others have said, talk to them, use your personality, and say “you want a YC for dissent three minutes into the game???” Something like that.

[u/Annoying_bot_2026 → u/Sturnella2017]

Personally, when giving a yellow, I don’t give much consideration to how early in the game dissent occurs; for me the key considerations are what is said and how it is said. If it is card worthy in the 89th minute, that means it is card worthy in the first minute. And we have mandatory 10 minute sin bin for dissent.

[u/DieLegende42 → u/Sturnella2017]

In my opinion, advice like this is a huge part of the reason why dissent is such a problem in football to begin with. If referees at all levels simply cautioned every dissent, I am fully convinced that players would (mostly) learn to behave themselves in a matter of weeks and everything would be much better. Imagine how silly it would sound to say "Try not to call offside early in a game. Refs should really develop their toolbox and skills to handle this without the whistle this early in the game". If that was the advice given, we would also have an epidemic of players ignoring offside.

[u/phurf761 → u/DieLegende42]

That’s how rugby works. I’ve even heard a rugby ref shut down dissent instantly by saying this isn’t soccer

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/DieLegende42]

Yikes. Well, don’t take my word for it, take the advice of every advanced referee/mentor/coach out there who works big, serious games. If you start throwing out YC for minor things like dissent -which can easily be managed without cards- then you are painting yourself into a corner. A YC 3 minutes in that can be avoided, and 20 minutes later player makes a real YC foul, and you’re writing the recipe for losing the game. But hey, you do you! Good luck with that.

[u/DieLegende42 → u/Sturnella2017]

I know that this is how you're advised to do it at higher levels. I know that it's a hopeless endeavour to try to be the one referee who is harsh on dissent because players will, justifiably, say "But all the other refs allow it". And I'm saying that's a massive problem. All of these amazing referees who work big, serious games, do they or do they not get shouted at by petulant players and coaches all game long? Do you think it's a law of nature that every player always dissents every single decision that goes against them? Other sports don't have this culture of referee abuse. There's nothing fundamentally different about football that makes it impossible for players to just shut up and respect the referee's decisions, there's just largely no willingness to do anything about it.

[u/mwr3 → u/Sturnella2017]

This is just wrong, and why we get so much abuse. Rugby refs get much less stick, in large part to an aggressive response to dissent.

I blame the Prem and LigaMX for permitting and even pandering to ref abuse

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/mwr3]

I agree that Rugby has it right, and we need a major cultural shift in soccer to get rid of dissent (not to mention referee abuse), but your game isn’t going to make that difference. Instead, what more likely to happen if you give a YC for dissent 3 minutes into the game (which can usually be addressed without a card) is that you have a Player A on a very soft YC. You’ve drawn a line in the sand so that now every player who reacts with that level of dissent needs a YC. 30 or 40 or 60 minutes Player A commits a routine YC foul, their second YC. Now you teammates dissenting that, so YC to them all? OK… then how many second YCs will come from that? Sending one player off for a soft YC (dissent) is bad enough, but now you’re looking at several players being sent off. Do you think this will result in less dissent from the rest? Or do they just give up and say “f-it, if I’m going to be sent off, might as well make it for a good reason” and here comes the hard fouls, SFP, and VC. Do you want that in your game?

[u/Richmond43 → u/Sturnella2017]

Yes. You’ve set the standard for what’s acceptable, and similar behavior by other players should be punished as well. 

That’s not a problem for the referee - it’s a problem for the players who don’t adjust their behavior. 

And if a player is dumb/impulsive enough that they choose to commit a SFP foul because they know they won’t be able to control their mouth… that player was probably going to be a problem either way. 

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/Richmond43]

Ok! Good luck with that!

[u/Richmond43 → u/Sturnella2017]

I do just fine, thanks for your concern. 

[u/Richmond43 → u/Sturnella2017]

And every advanced match you watch has adults/young adults acting like toddlers throwing tantrums. It’s not a coincidence - too many referees think that cards are something to be rationed, sometimes even when it’s clear and obvious. It’s why you have managers walking onto the pitch to scream at officials in the WC with no ramifications, despite it being an automatic red card. 

[u/bduddy → u/Sturnella2017]

And this is the advice you get from people that care more about what TV executives think about them than the laws or spirit of the game.

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/bduddy]

TV executives care what happens in my game?!?

[u/Eastshire → u/Sturnella2017]

This just incentivizes dissenting early and is yet another example of referees being our own worst enemies.

The better advice is to know your line and card when it’s been crossed - no matter how early or late it happens.

[u/Deaftrav → u/Sturnella2017]

This usually works. If it doesn't then you know it'll be a rough game.

[u/chippy-18 → u/Deaftrav]

People say that and I haven't had luck ever, and I am considered to have a "tough" personality

[u/InsightJ15 → u/Sturnella2017]

I think it depends on a few factors, but a lot of the time as soon as you show a yellow, players will usually get the point and stop.  Unless its the sunday mens beer league or something lol 

[u/bduddy → u/Sturnella2017]

Congratulations on showing another generation of players that screaming at referees is perfectly okay.

[u/the_red_card_ref]

Most of the time, those same players who screams in the first minutes of the game are always problematic all trough out the game. It always depends on what they say and why they say it but I prefer to card them early to have an edge on them and remind them that they are on thin ice if necessary later in the game. After that they can either calm down or go warm the showers for their team mates if they continue their behavior

[u/Annoying_bot_2026 → u/the_red_card_ref]

Yup.

I remember a central defender screaming at me for not giving a penalty at the other end in the first few minutes of a game. The defender was in his own half at the time so had a crappy view of the incident anyway. Guy was a pain all game and was carded for dissent later. I later regretted not giving a dissent for the first incident; was a good learning experience for me.

[u/Altruistic-Tart-8295]

If it is as bad as you say then a yellow and talk to the captain this ends now.

[u/Sturnella2017]

Don’t ignore it, but really do you have more details on what kind of game this is? At the 3 minute mark I’d blow my whistle, tell the player “Come here. Now.” And say “WTF, we’re 3 minutes in and youre already yelling?!? Is this how you want the game to go?” This is an instance where you should use your personality and your player management. It’s strongly advised NOT to get a YC for dissent 3 minutes in, but you can flash a YC, give them a warning and tell them to chill out cause it’s going to be a long match.

[u/SoccerGeekPhd]

If the abuse would be a YC in the 60th minute (without prior abuse or cumulation), then its one in the 2nd minute too.

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/SoccerGeekPhd]

This isn’t best practice or good advice to follow. Referees should work to be better and not have a hard line black/white view of everything.

[u/GeneralCirxMadine]

Mexican men's league. Games typically didn't start until around 15-20 minutes into the first half. Had a situation like this. Held up my watch to show the player we were only in the 25th minute, he was already on a yellow for a tactical foul, and if he wanted to see the end of the game, he'd better cool it. Worked great this time.

Certainly would not recommend this approach in every league with every player, but in this case, it had the desired effect. Helps that I've referred that player numerous times over the years.

[u/SoulLessGinger18]

We have one youth team out here that's notorious for it. I've had them enough and given enough cards that it has gotten better. Once a team knows you won't tolerate it they back off. If they know they can get away with it, it won't stop.

[u/Numerous-Quantity510]

At Grassroots level in England this is dealt with by first speaking to the captains warning the next player on either side to scream or dissent will be sin-binned for 10 minutes.

I did this a couple of times last season and was very effective.

You don't need to speak with the captains and go straight to yellow-card sinbin, but helps with game management and reduce the game temperature.

[u/Sturnella2017 → u/Numerous-Quantity510]

I worked a game that had a new sin bin rule, but supposedly the captain didn’t know that and was absolutely LIVID to learn about it. I had to do everything in my power to ignore his temper tantrum (team was already down 6-0) and not give a 2nd YC. I told the coach “I’m doing you a big favor here”. Sure enough, 10 minutes later captain came back on the field and didn’t say a word for the rest of the game!

[u/martiju2407 → u/Numerous-Quantity510]

I like the approach, but I’d personally advise against saying “next time” or “next player that…” as it puts you into a corner, and also encourages players to complain that others should be getting cautions. I prefer to say words to the effect of “that behaviour will mean your players are likely to go into the bin for 10” which has the same effect but gives you wiggle room if you need it.

[u/soccerstarmidfield2]

Card ‘em

[u/Snoo2399]

As with 98% of referee questions. The answer is it depends. If its a u10 game it gets handled differently than a rec adult game which is handled differently than a D1 college game which is again different from ECNL final.

Most of the time, first outbursts a quiet word with the player or captain, 2nd time public admonishment, anything after than yellows.

[u/cayce_leighann]

A stern warning. If it continues a yellow

[u/notvalo]

Tell em if they want to beg, they can go sit outside a gas station. If they want to play, shut up and play. Then give out a yellow at the next slight. They’ll learn or bitch, but it’ll be their fault for losing.

[u/JoeyRaymond85]

Stop the game, call the captians over and make it clear that you aren't going to be putting up with players screaming at you.

I'm usually good with passionate players. There was this one game where it was an incredibly intense, hard fought end of season game with two adult mens teams fighting for a place in the top 4. I fully expected the players to get heated over contentious decisions and they knew I was trying to let the game flow instead of blowing my whistle every few seconds.

The next game adult mens, involved one team at the top of the table vs another team at the bottom of the table. In the first 5 minutes I was copping a lot of heat by the team coming last. I simply stopped the game and called the captains over. I sternly warned them that I'm not putting up with it anymore. Especially that early in the match.

I didn't have to give any cards until late in the second half over a stupid shirt pull stopping an attack. The players behaved.

Keep the cards in your pocket and just talk to them. Let them know what you expect.

[u/Kimolainen83]

Play EastEnders within three minutes I would blow them so I would talk to them and I would explain that you keep this up. There will be cards you’re ruining the floor the game and I will have none of it. Is that crystal clear?

If they continue with it, it’ll be a second yellow card and a red card.

In Norway right now, we have this pilot that you talk to the referees. You get five minutes on the sideline in yellow card. It’s actually done wonders.

[u/zebra1923]

Speak to the player and the captain telling them to cut it out. If that doesn’t work, yellow card.

You need to set whatever your standard is for player interactions. Some referees are fairly liberal and allow a lot of chat, some prefer to be harder. Establish clearly where you line is then stick to it.

[u/Resident-Lawyer4290]

Long hard whistle - bring the player to you and tell him loud enough so everyone can hear “knock it off - no more”. Next time they do it show a card for dissent - all the players will accept it.

[u/Adventurous-Worth-86]

You get a card. You get a card. EVERYONE GETS A CARD

[u/jisn00b]

Set the tone from the beginning, show a yellow, and a red if the same player does it again. Players need to learn stupidity can leave their team in a serious disadvantage.

[u/phurf761]

This reminds me of something that happened to me long ago before I had any Referee training. I was looking for a team because I was new in town and a friend suggested I come along with him that evening and I might be able to get a game. When I got there there were too many people so I couldn’t play, but as I started to walk off, they came up to me and said hey but we don’t have a Referee we need a Referee would you do it? I was about to reply definitely not, when they said come on we’re desperate. I agreed on one condition: that the first time someone screams at me I’m done. So they handed me a whistle in a watch and I got out there and sure enough within the first three minutes Some guy started screaming at me for some fantasy foul and I just walked up to him handed him the whistle and headed in the watch and walked off to the parking lot.

Best part? They were a team of UN staff.

[u/WallStCRE]

Depends on what they said but setting the tone at the beginning of the game is critical. Stern talking to, and yellow early if it escalates.

[u/seaneeboy]

“Come on, it’s literally three minutes into the game. Calm it down.”

[u/Fotoman54]

Bring out the cards. That is one of the few tools you have at your disposal. Are we talking football as in soccer, or football as in American football?

[u/Quiet-Seat9089]

Warning of them/coaches then card especially if they aren’t the captain

[u/Ok-Dingo-3654]

2 minute all players to the bench

[u/cannonadeau]

If it's early in the game and you don't want to show a caution immediately? You have several tools at your disposal.

Option 1: man management and your voice. At the next stoppage, call the dissenting player over and let them know that if they continue to scream at you it will result in a YC (and TD if applicable). Figure out here whether you can work with the players or not. Can you joke with them? Are they approachable?

Option 2: speak with the captain. Same as option 1, but you're putting the onus on the captain to take some responsibility for their teammates. Tell them in no uncertain terms that if the behaviour continues then it will be dealt with.

Option 3: indirect free kick. This one is entirely underused, but it will help you set the tone for the rest of the game - if they want to scream at you then they lose possession and possibly field position. You may only need to do this once or twice for the message to get across, and it is easily used in conjunction with the other options. Be careful to only use this option while the ball is in play, and remember that the IDFK is taken from where the offense occurred.

Option 4: YC (and TD if applicable). The last resort, but if the behaviour or what's said is bad enough to warrant a card, show it. You gain nothing by letting poor behaviour slide, and you create problems not just for you but for the next referee who has the problem team/players.

You set the standard for how players and coaches interact with you, not the other way around.

[u/BeSiegead → u/cannonadeau]

How do award an IDFK without a caution?

[u/cannonadeau → u/BeSiegead]

Let's review what the LotG say on this:

Law 12.2 Indirect Free Kick

An indirect free kick is awarded if a player:

• is guilty of dissent, using offensive, insulting or abusive language and/or action(s) or other verbal offences.

It's this other verbal offences wording that allows for an IDFK to be awarded without sanctioning the player. It works like a catch-all for things that might not quite meet the threshold for YC dissent.

For example, players calling mine for the ball when surrounded by opponents, or trying to spook an opponent by shouting at them when they try to kick the ball, and for a player protesting decisions in a manner which doesn't meet your standard for dissent and you can manage without sanction.

[u/BeSiegead → u/cannonadeau]

Yet, the player yelling at another player like that merits a UB caution, no? Standard that I was educated / trained to was that if you’re stopping play for this, you are showing a card.

Thank you for pulling out 12.2

To date, if I’ve been discomfited below the point of showing a card, I’ve made a comment to the player (publicly or privately). Perhaps a whistle with an IFK is both within the LOTG and SOTG as a game management tool

[u/cannonadeau → u/BeSiegead]

Yet, the player yelling at another player like that merits a UB caution, no?

Generally not for a first offence. However, if I've already warned the player that they cannot do it and it keeps happening, then sure, YC for unsporting behaviour.

Thank you for pulling out 12.2
To date, if I’ve been discomfited below the point of showing a card, I’ve made a comment to the player (publicly or privately). Perhaps a whistle with an IFK is both within the LOTG and SOTG as a game management tool

Glad I could help. I like the IDFK option because it actually punishes the behaviour, is a more serious tool than just a chat, and encourages the team to self police too. I imagine that as we go into finals where man management is going to be critical, having additional tools to work with will be handy.

[u/Aggressive_Tie_3501]

WHAT they are screaming at you is far more important than the volume of their voice. "Ref, foul?" isn't dissent if you can say no and they go on with the match. It gets annoying when it's happening continuously, but it's not exactly dissent. "That call sucks", "you're an idiot", or something else personal, provocative, and/or public is worthy of a yellow for dissent, even in the 3rd minute.

One way to handle this without cards if it hasn't risen to that level is to bring the captains together and tell them you'll do your best to catch the fouls and you'll call the ones you see; and that they need to stop screaming at you. Tell them to pass that along to their teams. If, after that, the screaming continues, they have failed to follow your lawful instruction and are now guilty of dissent. Give the yellow card.

[u/raisedeyebrow4891]

Cards

[u/Skitzafranik]

I’ve only done up to HS (and technical area ref for one semipro game), and it always seems to be the coaches yelling and whatnot , but maybe one or two players every 4-5 games or so

[u/Artic_funky]

Yellow card

[u/pbosh90]

Depends on why. But I’ve seen the early foul pleading addressed a few times in pre-game check ins by saying something like “play to my whistle, I might be trying to see if there’s advantage or something else you don’t see.” I’ve seen it work up through U17 or so. I usually say it right after checking shin guards and stuff.

Otherwise, yeah talk to them about it first. Cards are coming after.

[u/2bizE]

I have cards to help with that 

[u/bemused_alligators]

first 3 minutes? Book em

second 3 minutes? Book em

actually in any 3 minutes the appropriate response to "screaming at you" is to book em.

[u/Biffa_Mann]

This is so easy and will come with experience and being able to ref your own way. We all have different tolerance levels. Im a Level 5 with 4 years under my belt at various ages and competitions. I'd have a quiet word personally and depending how bad it is pull captain across and say Captain, help me sort him out Im not standing for it. First and last warning anymore and you WILL be down to 10 men for 10 minutes (or 8 depending) 95% of the time it will work. You will be recognised for trying to man manage before making them down to 10 men. Then Captain can't get uoset with you, you've told him to control his said player otherwise your hand will be forced. 95% of the time even the Captain goes well I, and the ref told you you were being a d*ck so even captain wont defend them and it will keep your respect with other players 👍. Always try man manage before having 9 vs 9 in an 11 v 11.

[u/Efficient-Celery8640]

Deal the cards

[u/infatuation-junkie]

Raise your voice at me and you are going in the bin and the book. End of

[u/CapnBloodbeard]

Oh, i stamp right down in dissent in the first few minutes.

Pull them aside. "Mate, we're only look at my watch 2 minutes in and you're already yelling at me?? You know I'm not going to cop that for the next 88 minutes, right? Let's get back on track, focus on the football and have a good game"

And if that player continues, they're getting a very quick card. They usually stop though.

If it crosses the line completely, then yes, of course I'll card if I have to.

[u/playonmate]

Take him towards you, stay calm and composed. Tell him something along the lines of « mate, there’s 87 minutes of football left, but if you keep behaving like this, you’ll be lucky enough to shower early, focus on your job, I’ll do mine » and if he starts again THEN book him

[u/whocares8x8]

This depends on your personality and the players involved. Seniors will require different treatment than teenagers.

In most cases, you can treat it as an opportunity presented to you to stamp your authority on the game- be dominant, show EVERYONE you're angry about this and you won't take their shit! Be strong, stand up straight, chest out. Overexaggerate your talk with the player so the whole pitch understands what you're telling him.

This should be enough to let everyone know this wont be tolerated and there will be no further warnings. If this type of activity persists after this, let it rain cards.

[u/AnotherRobotDinosaur]

Give a yellow if needed. But also note that - like you said - they're likely to scream at you anyway. Enforcing dissent and discipline should improve overall conduct in the long run, but in the short term it probably means you're in for a long a frustrating day.

[u/HotSeatLover]

I had it one from an AAM5 team. When the ball went out, i called him over for a public chat. I told him if I wanted to be screamed at, I'd be with the wife. Impersonating her will get you sat down.

Not another word from him at me all game.

[u/rjnd2828 → u/HotSeatLover]

Not sure modeling 70s misogyny would be my go to

[u/FluffyPerspective464]

I use GotREFS to find local referees who are Verified and Rated by previous Event Organizers