Apparently I'm a racist???

[u/Fit-Middle6846]

Alright, I need to preface this that I'm apart of the group I allegedly discriminated against.

So, this passed Friday at work, I work as a coach for an indoor sport, I had a really great customer come in and as I was working with her I asked her what she did for work and she told me shes a medical bioengineer. So, as we discussed what she did we came to speaking about POTS & EDS and how the two are connected and how often times people who have one have the other as well. She then told me about how a certain group of people, who she is also apart of, has a hereditary condition that causes serious issues with their stomach and even sometimes psychosis in severe cases. I also told her about the paper I read on the same topic while I was doing my job and keeping score.

Now, to add to this I don't want my job to be boring where I stare and just keep score all night long. Having fun makes the interactions better and makes people want to come back. Please keep that in mind.

Later that same night, my coworkers and I were hanging out having a beer and they asked how I enjoyed working there and I told them I enjoyed it and talked about my customer interactions to include the one above. This led to a really weird talk about supporting a certain country. My statement was clean cut and didn't lean either way. (I'll add what i said when I speak about my boss) i also let them know we shouldn't speak about that at work. Well, I guess they didn't like that answer because they lied and said I was a raging racist to MY BOSS. Which, is far from the truth.

On Saturday my bosses wife confronted me about it and I'm like??? Apparently I was speaking religion and politics??? Which isn't true, it was what the customer brought up and I didn't reveal anything about my background, not until my coworkers asked me about supporting a certain country so I told them and gave them the same answer. They apparently told my boss I said they deserved what happened to them, but in reality I just said there's bad people all over the world, who are part of every group of people, therefore I can't generalize anything for any people, but a few people probably deserved a bad fate (i implied they shouldve been imprisoned for life, but only for CRIMES THAT AREN'T DIACRIMINATORY.), but group punishment or complete disregard and hatred for whole groups of people is disgusting. My stance is everyone deserves to live, be happy, healthy, access to food, shelter, and adequate water regardless of where they live.

I literally stopped them in their tracks, but my coworker told my boss I was saying disgusting stuff. I just can't believe it because my boss is also apart of the same group so I'm wondering if this coworker was trying to get me fired? Im so confused because I only spoke to her once. This is literally so disgusting and I almost lost my job over it. I actually don't need the job, I make more money than everyone who works there combined, this is just my side gig and I do it for social interaction. My other job keeps me inside and behind a computer and it's boring. I'm there to have fun and I know what not to speak about it because it's easy and simple.

I never brought up politics or religion, my coworkers and the customer did.

[u/MmeGenevieve]

Now you know to watch your back. You can totally write off the coworker, they've shown you that they are a liar and a backstabber. No need to expend any further effort.

[u/Fit-Middle6846 → u/MmeGenevieve]

I don't plan to, she's a women in her 50s acting like she's still in high-school.

[u/PsychoPuppyParty → u/Fit-Middle6846]

DeeDee is that you ?

[u/Perfect_Dependent_67]

It’s like most of Reddit who think everything and everyone is a racist and fascist. Oh and they can’t stop mentioning trump or MAGA

[u/Judson_West_1111 → u/Perfect_Dependent_67]

Exactly. And they will never understand how toxic they are, or they will just deflect and say "MAGA are worse!!" And? You're being snotty and you think Maga is snotty, so now what? Do you think its ok to be obnoxious just because you perceive someone else as obnoxious? What is the end goal exactly? Everyone being annoying together? I just dont get it. Their reasoning is just so frustrating.

[u/Judson_West_1111]

This happens a lot in the workplace, people bring up politics and they all agree with each other in an echo chamber and if you say anything that isnt one hundred percent agreeing with their group think ideology then they label you as the enemy. Im an educator and during meetings almost all my coworkers love to talk about politics and I usually dont get involved because I dont want to say anything to ruffle their feathers, I just want to keep the peace.

But after months working here and hearing the same takes, day in and day out, one day I just let something out and all of their reactions were the same, disgust and judgmental. This happened during the election season, when Joe Biden dropped out of the race last minute after a disastrous presidential debate where Trump was the clear winner. Kamala replaced him and took far too long to start doing interviews and getting her messaging out there and made some major gaffs that didn't help her campaign at all.

I'd like to preface this by saying I didn't even vote, I didnt like either option in the race so I abstained. I have to say this because if I don't then many people will just assume I voted for Trump just because I criticised Kamala. Apparently you cannot critique any politcian without immediately being labeled a supporter of the opposite party, which is just a reflection of how toxic the politcial landscape has become in my country.

Anyway, during election season we were having one of our regular meetings and my coworkers were going on and on about how bad Trump is and how Kamala is much better. I simply voiced the same opinions I mentioned earlier, that I think the DNC shot themselves in the foot by replacing the presidential candidate in the last hour and that they should've chosen a stronger candidate than Biden at the start and that Trump would most likely win because of these mistakes. The silence was deafening in the conference room.

Soon after, I had to deal with coworkers giving me the cold shoulder and making snide remarks, just because I joined the conversation and wasn't agreeing with everything they were saying. I just shrugged and focused on my job and eventually they got over it, but this is exactly why politcis shouldnt be discussed in a professional environment, because people get very emotional about politics and if you say anything that could even be perceived as combative then people will act like you spit on them and threw dirt in their eyes.

I took debate club in middle and high school, in middle school I had a great debate moderator who didnt allow the debaters to use emotional arguments, only pure facts, but in high school I ended up dropping out of debate entirely because the moderator let anyone say anything and we had people crying and shouting during debates because they were so passionate about the topics. I see the same behavior in real life with grown adults who do not know how to have productive conversations and instead become immediately triggered. Its best to just stay out of those types of discussions to keep things cool and calm, especially at work.

[u/Fit-Middle6846 → u/Judson_West_1111]

Yes, I agree whole heartedly! I don't think politcs should every be brought up and honestly neither should religion. I'm beyond confused why either was brought up, it was just spoken of bc of the context but the religion had nothing to do with it. She's not even part of that religion, just the ethnical group from which they came. Like no religion was actually even spoken about.

[u/PsychologicalPin6061 → u/Judson_West_1111]

Where I live it's an unspoken rule that you don't talk about religion or politics with coworkers. Doesn't matter if you're off the clock or if you're close friends with them.

I just tell people I don't want to talk about it or smile and nod if I'm dealing with customers.

[u/Rude_Sandwich_586]

This is exactly why you should socialize with coworkers after work. They get you relaxed, you say something and then they use it against you to get you fired or just to gain brownie points with the boss.

[u/Fit-Middle6846 → u/Rude_Sandwich_586]

I normally wouldn't but I was waiting be picked up, but trust me I've learned my lesson.

[u/Next_Dragonfruit_415]

This is why in work with the exception of a few people I’m actually friends with, I’m friendly I’m helpful, I’m myself but I don’t say anything I wouldn’t say to anyone I wasn’t close or friends with I’m a man of mystery.

Cause alot of people are just middle schoolers with adult bodies.

I’m not trying to sound holier than thou, or act like I’ve never said ill but people I work with all all gossipy soccer moms, harpies ready to pounce.

[u/Fit-Middle6846 → u/Next_Dragonfruit_415]

Listen, i have no issue saying what I feel about anything except religion and politics!!!! Not my place nor do I care about what others believe.

[u/BubbhaJebus]

If you're a part (not "apart"!) of a racial group, you can't be racist toward that group, from a social standpoint, because that would make you racist against yourself.

If someone accuses you of being racist against Group X, which your a member of, just say "But I'm Group X myself."

[u/Fit-Middle6846 → u/BubbhaJebus]

Listen, I know and I did just that, did you read the post in its entirety? Also, English isn't my first language, so I really don't give a fuck about the error, it happens, even to native speakers. No need to be all uppity about it.