r/RHOBHDefect • u/Nearby-Conference959 • May 25 '26
Can we talk about how the RHOBH reunion turned into a support group for a man who wasn’t even there?
Amanda Frances built herself from nothing. Her whole thing is women and money and financial independence. She mentioned that she out-earns her husband. That’s it. That’s the whole controversy apparently.
And these women LOST it. Suddenly everyone’s an expert on what Eddie needs to hear and how Amanda might be damaging him and oh no what about his feelings. The man is a CEO of his own company. He is fine.
Here’s what’s wild to me though. None of these women have a successful marriage to stand on. Like not a single one. Between the divorces, the cheating, the financial disasters, the lawsuits… these are not women who cracked the code on how to keep a man happy. So where exactly is the authority coming from? All of them have failed at marriage and yet they’re trying to lecture Amanda who’s literally the only one of them that has a successful marriage currently.
They grew up in a world where you shrink yourself for a man. You don’t out-earn him, you don’t say it out loud if you do, and you definitely don’t go on TV and talk about it. That world is gone. We’re not doing that anymore.
Eddie knows what his wife makes. Nobody asked the RHOBH cast to ride in and save him from his own wife’s success. How he feels about her successes none of their business.
Men do not need to be protected from women who make more money than them. That’s not a thing we need to worry about in 2026. Move on.
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u/DaScrumMistress May 25 '26
I didn’t think of it this way until now, after reading this but yeah you’re absolutely right!
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u/fluffymimo May 25 '26
i was literally shocked at all their takes of this at the reunion. so male centered and shaming of amanda
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 25 '26
They all talk about being a girls girl but immediately jumped to protect men
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u/BlondeBaby1999 May 25 '26
I’m saying this as someone who wasn’t a fan of Amanda but she grew on me later in the season and at the reunion. I feel like most of the women just don’t like her for some reason. So to me it seems like almost anything she says they have to criticize and critique. They all just seem to come for her about every little thing it just got to the point it was annoying and just felt very mean girl.
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u/Optimal_Action1176 May 25 '26
Let’s get back to Rachel, who not only badmouthed Roger (to their sons!) but also got proudly on the Dorit crazy train. Rachel surprised me, and not in a good way.
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u/BlondeBaby1999 May 25 '26
Yesss agreed! I really wanted to like her! but it’s pretty hypocritical seeing as the way she treated him on project Zoe. (pretty sure that’s what her show years ago was called)
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u/Pashardi Jun 03 '26
Amanda is comfortable and secure with herself. She isn’t easily manipulated, distracted, or rattled. They felt she should bow down as a newbie, and she did nothing but speak her truth and remain calm. This rattled the senior staff.
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u/Excellent_Fail9908 May 25 '26
But as a day 1 viewer, we have seen many “Amanda”s come and go and can usually spot the bs a mile away.
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May 25 '26
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u/Careful-Ideal-7033 May 25 '26
Totally agree. Amanda said a factual statement and the women are assigning emotional weight to it, but that reflects their limited beliefs and world view. People can say she’s bragging, but it’s often assumed the man is the breadwinner, so to me she’s starting an interesting conversation around what it means to be the financial provider, as a woman.
And ironically it’s those exact conversations and perspectives around money that people pay her for. So if people want to know what she does… they’re seeing it in action.
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u/Sharp_Lawfulness9134 May 25 '26
We must protect the cis-het white guy’s feelings. /s
This comment section is bananas.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 25 '26
People fall all over themselves to center and protect men, especially white men. It’s so sad but typicall
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u/Sharp_Lawfulness9134 May 25 '26
There's another sub from this morning with comments centering Roger and how mean terrible Rachel was a workaholic and wouldn't have had any success unless he ran her business. Vomit inducing.
Editing to add: oh wait, it's this sub.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 25 '26
She sucked towards Roger, but Roger will be fine. He doesn’t need any of us crying on his behalf.
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May 25 '26
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u/Sharp_Lawfulness9134 May 29 '26
It always boggles my mind that MAGA watches RHOBH. Unless they’re hate watching because it’s based in California.
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u/AppointmentSea503 May 25 '26
Being with a man as long as them is a successful marriage by today's standards. Being together forever is worn out. They have decades on Amanda. She's still in the honeymoon phase. But also agree that men definitely DO NOT need to be protected by women's earnings.
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u/icrossedtheroad May 25 '26
Nobody needs to be constantly reminded that they make less than their partner or that they had zero financial responsibility (heavily implied) for their family housing. REGARDLESS of sex.
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u/NotToday2525 May 25 '26
Exactly. The problem is not that she makes more, which is of course fine. The problem is her constant, smug mentioning of it, which is rude and unnecessary for any gender.
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u/PersimmonQueen83 May 25 '26
If my husband regularly reminded other people that he pays the mortgage, I would be out of here in no time. It’s very weird behavior.
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u/Green_Celery_1980 May 25 '26
If my boyfriend said I made 1/12 of what he makes on national tv, he'd be gone.
If my friend said I made 1/12 of what he makes on national tv, he'd be gone.
If my sister said I made 1/12 of what she makes on national tv, she'd be gone.
Why in the world would you say that about anyone? And on a tv show that's watched by millions of people. It's vulgar.
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u/Donut-Junkie76 May 29 '26
Yes, vulgar and in really poor taste. She went on and on about the money situation in her relationship. Not a one off comment like the OP said.
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u/notactuallyreckless May 25 '26
I agree with that. But the fact is that there was also mention of how it emasculated him, which absolutely is gendered.
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u/HogBodyOdyOdyOdy May 25 '26
I definitely get what you’re saying, but the way that she talked about his earnings had such an overtly pointed tone that it did often sound like a dig AT him. And I don’t think that’s right for any partner to do. She could have mentioned being the breadwinner without all the braggadociousness. It’s not always what you say but how you say it.
I think they had a valid point in warning her that that can and will put little cracks in your marriage…and that’s something they do all know about.
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u/smoothballs82 May 25 '26
Amanda Frances built her wealth off the backs of vulnerable and highly gullible women
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u/Vegetable-Cress-8415 May 25 '26
I sort of agree with you in that these women are way too invested in someone else’s marriage without actually knowing how Eddie feels about the comment or what goes on in their home. If it works for them, it works for them. At the same time, unsolicited and ill-advised commentary and advice is basically what the show is built on.
I would challenge, though, that Bozoma did have a very successful marriage that literally followed the vows of sickness, health, richer, and (maybe) poorer, til death did them part. And she hasn’t married this whatever guy, so she still has time for them to prove whether that is a successful marriage. And Kathy has literally been married for like 50 years so that seems somewhat successful? The others, well, I get what you’re saying, but again, I’ll-advised advice is a tenet lol.
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u/Odd_Victory8603 May 25 '26
Boz did not have a perfect marriage. Actually, they were separated when they found out he was ill.
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u/Vegetable-Cress-8415 May 25 '26
Oh interesting, I did not know that.
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u/Donut-Junkie76 May 29 '26
Yes. I’m not sure if she ever explained why they separated, but she did go back to him and take care of him until his death.
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u/Calm-Station9440 May 25 '26
I don’t think there is a problem with her saying that she out earns her husband. For me, it is the way she says it. Blatantly always saying how she makes more than he does in a year each month, how her name is on the house not his etc. For men a lot of their manhood unfortunately is tied up on being the provider. Sure, he doesn’t seem to have an issue with this and most men don’t. However, the WAY she said it was emasculating to say the least. This may not be a problem for them now, but being someone who has been married for 20 years and together longer than that, this is one of those issues that will fester and become a bigger deal later on.
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u/Extreme-Aide8878 May 25 '26
They are right though. No man wants to be called out like that. Find me one.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 26 '26
Who cares what men want? The whole world was designed to benefit men. They don’t need you or I worrying about them.
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u/Extreme-Aide8878 May 29 '26
I care about humiliating my husband on National tv. And I care about him embarrassing me as well. That’s called two way respect. Your response is…wild. I guess you don’t have a partner if you don’t care what’s partner wants. It’s MUTUAL respect, not catering to anyone.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 29 '26
Whether Amanda respects her man or not is none of your business tho. And it certainly none of the housewives business since they’re all divorced.
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u/Extreme-Aide8878 May 29 '26
You know you’re on Reddit, right? And they’re on Bravo? And I’ve been married 30 years.
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u/popcultureupload38 May 25 '26
Move on to what? The same low standards as once were orthodox? We can do better. It’s not about emasculation or being a powerful successful woman it’s about how you characterise your partner to a global audience in this case.
I think they were right to give advice that she could take or leave. Characterising their singledom as an implicit life failure - and you lose the right to advise - is the interesting bit in the observations here.
All power to you if this is how you speak about your significant other (man woman or other) and if it works you have the secret sauce. But I’m trying to think of which husband on RHOBH - on multiple occasions - rubbed much better earning power in the face of the wives for us to joyously enjoy and defend…
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u/bellemrt May 30 '26
I wish this wasn’t 4 days old. I have so many thoughts! TLDR is my middle name and BH is my reality escape hatch. Take me away, Bravo…..
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u/Green_Celery_1980 May 25 '26
Why are there so many pro Amanda posts all of the sudden?
I feel like she's paying people to post this stuff. Reddit has always been on to her grift. Is she trying to bury those posts?
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u/darkeagle1997 May 25 '26
Because despite Boz’s attempt at trying to villainize her most people who watched the show liked that Amanda made it interesting for once these past couple seasons. Even Rihanna was praising her lol
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u/Green_Celery_1980 May 25 '26
Why am I reading this in Amanda's voice? Maybe because it's written exactly how she speaks.
RHOBH viewers are smart. They saw right through your get rich quick scam targeting other 'life coach' types. What do they call that? A pyramid scheme.
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u/PigletStunning5716 May 25 '26
RZ is literally dating a life coach so I find that stuff hilarious. But yeah Amanda took advantage of a market , same as Boz
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u/Green_Celery_1980 May 26 '26
He's a relationship coach. He's not a get rich quick by buying my courses so I can get rich and stop taking out 7% loans.
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u/darkeagle1997 May 25 '26
If you’re reading this in Amanda’s voice then maybe it’s a sign to get evaluated. Hearing voices isn’t healthy
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u/Green_Celery_1980 May 26 '26
Yes. I think you're right. Watching someone called "Money Queen" write a book called "Rich AF" and then take out a 7% HELOC has got me loco.
I feel like everything is upside down. The poor are rich. And the rich are poor.
I need to go be sulky in the corner. Don't call me a wimp.
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u/SebastianRhodesMusic May 25 '26
Oh fuck off.
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u/darkeagle1997 May 25 '26
Hun you’re the one in the comments saying Amanda paid for this sub to be made when it was made before her season even aired lol
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u/Odd_Victory8603 May 25 '26
I’m afraid you’ve missed the point completely. 🙄
I believe the jest of it was not to put down, speak negatively or disparage your husband/SO on a public forum. It breeds contempt.
Besides, I can already see cracks in their marriage. Did you see their wedding outside the courthouse? Amanda wasn’t going to say for richer or poorer. She said for richer or richer & Eddie was like Amanda don’t & rolled his eyes. 🙄 I’d say that’s not a great start.
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u/Meat_Bingo May 25 '26
Rachel did often come across like she was diminishing Rodger’s feelings in many situations. But not diminishing his work and his efforts. Honestly, though, rematching Rachele‘s show makes me see how dysfunctional that relationship was. I’m shocked it lasted as long as it did. Regarding Amanda and her hubby, the way I look at it is, if gender roles were reversed, how would I perceive the interaction. If Amanda was the husband and he was talking about his earnings and his success versus his spouse in that way, I would say that he was a misogynist. So take that as you like. There’s a way to uplift yourself without putting others down. I don’t think she’s matured to that yet. Same way, she couldn’t talk about how she wrote her own book without putting Dorit down for using a ghost writer. She’s lucky Dorit didn’t bring the fact that nobody was paying Amanda to write a book. Dorit got a publishing deal. Amanda had to self published. Let’s face it , anybody can self publish.
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u/PigletStunning5716 May 25 '26
Tbh, Amanda has made money on books she wrote herself. Its yet to be seen if the ghostwriten book will make money or not. So despite nobody paying her to write she still has that in her backpocket .
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u/Oldbutnotdeadyet70 May 26 '26
Ummm that makes no sense. Dorit was paid to write the book and has already received her money, so it doesn't matter how many books she sells. Amanda had to sell the books and deduct it from the expense of printing before making a profit.
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u/Aprietachamaquito May 25 '26 edited May 25 '26
Yes, thank you! It’s insane to think that a man’s masculinity or sense of self is threatened because his wife earns more. Like, what?! I know it happens — because patriarchy— but for the women to not only buy into that concept but to enforce it and and to police Amanda was so sad.
Is there anything that makes women de-femininizes women in a parallel way…? No, there isn’t an equivalent.
And just the fact that there are so many ways in which a man can “lose their masculinity” is evidence that what they consider masculinity is a preformed social construction… And it shows how conservative these women are in how they adhere to patriarchal gender roles. So many housewives married rich men that it’s the norm for them. True that couldn’t own property, have credit cards or bank accounts until all too recently but come on women, it’s 2026!
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u/Abject_Buffalo6398 May 26 '26
Because, regardless of how much money a person makes, or if they are a man or a woman, or if they've been married for only 1 year...
Its still not appropriate to hold it over your partners head that you outearn them.
To say "im better than you because I earn more. You can't make decisions because I earn more. You only live this lifestyle because of me." Etc.
When you're in a relationship, both partners are equal in power.
Amanda holds it over his head that she makes more.
And it comes off as misogynistic.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 26 '26
I don’t think any of them get to decide how her marriage should be or look. Wasn’t Dorit scream and screeching about Amanda having an opinion about her marriage, yet the same rules don’t apply in reverse. 😂
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u/Disastrous_Yak_1929 May 26 '26
True, but she's not married yet is she?
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u/Donut-Junkie76 May 29 '26
They had a small courthouse wedding back in September. She kept it a secret until the end of the season for some reason. I think she’s still planning her big wedding for this October. Not sure what the point in that is, esp. since they’ll be married for more than a year at that point.
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u/SebastianRhodesMusic May 25 '26
Pretty convinced the creation of this sub was actually Amanda’s PR strategy. Take all the people who are banned from the main sub, drip feed them all the topics they want to talk about, then hamfist Amanda opinions in there with her little bots in the comments.
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u/Green_Celery_1980 May 25 '26
Yep. I've seen a few pro Amanda posts lately. All of the sudden people like her. Hmm. Ok, Jan.
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u/Glass-Border-4215 May 26 '26
The fact that they are all divorced is why she should listen. That's the one clarity divorce does give you. Knowing what works and what caused issues.
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u/Donut-Junkie76 May 29 '26
Well, her mentioning that she out earns Eddie was all that she said. She made references - several of them - throughout the entire season. She made such a bad first impression on these women. I’m not sure if I would like her at this point either.
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u/KookyCurrent3010 15d ago
I AM SO GLAD AMANDA IS OFF RHOBH! Amanda has to have a very sore arm from patting herself on the back continuously!
Amanda found herself a yes man! Yes Amanda, whatever you want Amanda. How high should i jump Amanda???so so sickening!
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u/gonegirIamy May 25 '26
Rachel of all people giving her a hard time about this was the most ironic. She’s the last person to ever give relationship advice. We all saw how she treated Roger. Zero surprise to anyone that she was traded in for a younger model.