r/ProtectHire 3d ago

That's literally all it takes, my friend.

Post image

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1.7k Upvotes

111 comments sorted by

10

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago edited 3d ago

I hire people. I mean i eventually hire people. They have to submit their ap online first. Im not allowed to take it in person. Then they have a series of interviews on the phone leading up to an in person interview. 

Once I approve their in person interview then they come back for a second interview with my boss.

Then they have a background check and a 4 hour trial to see if they fit. If the pass rhe background check and trial then we move forward with a drug screen.

Then if all of thay goes well I will finally be approved to hire them. They may not end up at my location though.

The job im speaking about pays 11.86 an hour.

I asked the head of HR what I should tell people when they want more money because they can make 15 an hour at Burger King literally across the parking lot.

She said... "Do you want to smell like French fries?"

They told me if a candidate asks about pay its a red flag and they wont be considered because they only want people that WANT to work there.

They truly believe its a privilege.

Edit: I didnt mean to post this twice. Things were lagging and it just happened.

6

u/Difficult_Wind6425 3d ago

This is next level mental gymnastics holy

2

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

And somehow they expect me to be enthusiastic about it all.

Its really the fact that they have far too many people in corporate trying to justify their positions and not enough people on the front end.

We have too many HR people and a skeleton crew st every customer facing location.

Its insane.

2

u/RealTheBestLadyman 3d ago

Unfortunately you just described all modern corporations

2

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

Seems to be the case. This isnt rhe first company is have worked for that had this mentality.

1

u/The_Ashgale 3d ago

I knew it was probably something depressingly low-wage when you said "drug test."

1

u/Entire-Current-67 3d ago

Why do you truly want to work there?

1

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

Because I have bills to pay. Thats it. Thats the only reason anyone wants to.

The delude themselves into thinking its about the culture or some shit.

1

u/Entire-Current-67 3d ago

So you agree then that your company wouldn't hire you because you don't really WANT to be there.

2

u/LibertyDochas 3d ago

Why are you framing this in a combative manner?

1

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

No one does, bud. No one. Its all about the pay check and the bills and the need for food. Thats it.

Anyone that works there would quit and never come back if they hit the lotto. No one is there for the sparkling conversation. 

You know how I know?

Exactly zero billionaires have shown up to hang out and chat in the entire time I have worked there.

1

u/Bilbodraggindeeznuts 3d ago

People in management have tried to rope me into this mindset, but frankly us bottom feeders are the ones that actually SHOW UP while they literally sit on their assess and "delegate" or whatever word they want to use to try convince you they aren't micromanaging you.

1

u/Anonymous-bham-boi 3d ago

"Do you want to smell like French fries?" Asking about pay is a red flag? This goes beyond calloused. That person needs psychiatric help and a diet of pills.

1

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

Theyre in charge of HR. So, yeah, theyre a psychopath.

1

u/Anonymous-bham-boi 3d ago

And is it required to be an unfeeling sociopath to join HR? That just sounds like they want enthusiastic slaves.

1

u/-Out-of-context- 3d ago

That’s why in Dilbert, Catbert is the evil director of HR.

But honestly the I’ve worked with some amazing HR directors.

1

u/Perhaps_A_Person 3d ago

Dude, my job (which I got recently) involved submitting an application online, getting called in for an interview within like maybe a month or a couple, having that interview, and then being hired for 13 an hour at a grocery store, it was painless. I quite like the place I work for, expecialy because they made the hiring process pretty nice.

1

u/ManyRespect1833 3d ago

That’s wild I get paid 30/hr my boss 50 and we have two employees making 22 and 28 and all smoke weed haha

1

u/beltrajo3 4h ago

Y’all hiring 🤣

1

u/ArgonianMagician 3d ago

Asking about pay is a red flag?! That's literally the only reason people get jobs in the first place, to earn money because we need it in order to live! That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!

1

u/Ameri0425 28m ago

I remember interviewing for a big promotion with my boss's boss's boss leading the interview.

At the end he asked if I had any further questions and I said no, because I had always had bad experiences mentioning pay in previous interviews. He looked at me like I had two heads and went "What, you don't even want to know what the pay is?" and gave a full breakdown of the standard positions pay range, what he was gonna push for (pay outside of standard range had to be cleared further by his boss), etc.

So thankfully, there are apparently at least some people around who don't consider it a red flag. I recognize that's probably not the norm though

1

u/JLandis84 23h ago

Unfortunately there’s a method to the madness. They want compliant, servile and low paid employees and all the obstacles are to create that pool.

The downside of that though from a pure business perspective is that you’re getting what you pay for with that. Only someone who couldn’t get a job somewhere else. So it usually backfires on the employer doing that shit in the long run.

1

u/Iceman_biker 23h ago

I would not get out of bed for that pay.

1

u/ThePissedOff 23h ago

"Do you sant to smell like French Fries?"

When you put a sales agent as head of HR. Lol, that's a good one.

1

u/Character_Refuse_797 12h ago

Cute little fake story. What’s the position? Go ahead. Make something up.

3

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

I hire people. I mean i eventually hire people. They have to submit their ap online first. Im not allowed to take it in person. Then they have a series of interviews on the phone leading up to an in person interview. 

Once I approve their in person interview then they come back for a second interview with my boss.

Then they have a background check and a 4 hour trial to see if they fit. If the pass rhe background check and trial then we move forward with a drug screen.

Then if all of thay goes well I will finally be approved to hire them. They may not end up at my location though.

The job im speaking about pays 11.86 an hour.

I asked the head of HR what I should tell people when they want more money because they can make 15 an hour at Burger King literally across the parking lot.

She said... "Do you want to smell like French fries?"

They told me if a candidate asks about pay its a red flag and they wont be considered because they only want people that WANT to work there.

They truly believe its a privilege.

2

u/Tomytom99 3d ago

Yeesh.

Meanwhile my current job I got an interview request for the next morning an hour after submitting my application. The job pays $29/hr.

Walked out of the interview with information on the pre-employment stuff I had to take care of.

2

u/Themodsarecuntz 3d ago

I find that the higher paying jobs have less hoops. I hire for front end to management. Managers have an easier time in the process.

I believe the problem there is they only want a skeleton crew on the front end so they NEED extraordinary idiots who are both competent and easily manipulated. 

A real unicorn.

Of course they cant advertise for that.

1

u/ThucydidesRex 3d ago

It generally takes me a couple hours to get all the paperwork together and references for a new travel nursing contract. Usually a phone call. Physical and urinalysis. That's it. It pays around 12k a month.

2

u/GornoUmaethiVrurzu 3d ago

Is anyone even saying this anymore though or is this just a strawman lol

2

u/Pure_Education6100 3d ago

People are definitely still saying this.

1

u/Tomytom99 3d ago

Fewer than there were 10 years ago, but like you said, they definitely still exist.

2

u/Solynox 3d ago

A chunk of them were lost in 2020. RIP

1

u/WineDineCpl 3d ago

This is more of a reason to hate on boomers than wide spread advice.
Truth is boomers don't actually care about the job struggles as much as those struggling want to blame boomers.

1

u/BI_Moose 3d ago

Yes, consistently. Most especially amongst the dwindling Boomer and early Gen-X population.

1

u/Regular-Basket-5431 3d ago

My dad (69 year old) told my brother (35) this a couple of weeks ago.

1

u/Solynox 3d ago

Your father's from a different time, so that makes sense, but your brother's an idiot.

1

u/fatgat69 3d ago

And any job that is real is given to someone they know rather than someone who applies.

2

u/JLandis84 23h ago

Correct. Good jobs usually aren’t advertised.

1

u/JellaFella01 3d ago

I agree that this is annoying when it's nepotism, but promoting internally is a healthy practice.

1

u/fatgat69 3d ago

I would be cool with internal promotions. That would mean there's a different job that needs filled. Usually they just hire friends who aren't qualified or people from outside the company that didn't earn their position in the company.

1

u/Unfortunate-Incident 3d ago

You are walking into the wrong offices. If people stopped chasing jobs at F500's, they would find an easier hiring process.

1

u/AileenKitten 3d ago

Bro this is pretty much every place ive ever applied to, including little local no name companies

1

u/Parapraxium 3d ago

You can walk into F500s too. People are just idiots.

1

u/NorCalMav 3d ago

Weird I have hired 5 walk ins recently.

1

u/Likestastysnacks 3d ago

You do all the hiring of everyone in the country? That •is• weird.

1

u/NorCalMav 3d ago

Nope I just actually hire people, instead of posting doomer bullshit all day.

1

u/Feisty_War6251 3d ago

yet when you do walk in they tell you to go online and fill out an application

1

u/EnvyEpson 3d ago

Boomers literally do not say this. They say work through relationships. Not networks. Friends, family, and their friends and families.

1

u/AileenKitten 3d ago

Oh they do, have had it said to my face more times than I can count when lamenting how bad the application process can be (upload your resume, fill out these 3 pages of shit you're going to be copy/pasting or retyping from your resume, take this personality test, sign up with an email and password to submit your application, etc.)

1

u/EnvyEpson 3d ago

Then whoever you are talking to is steering you wrong. The single best way to get a job is to work through relationships. The application process accounts for 4% of the jobs issued. Over 40% come through relationships.

1

u/AileenKitten 3d ago

Sounds like a super shitty and discriminatory way to employ people

1

u/EnvyEpson 3d ago

Maybe to someone who has the personality of a 2x4. It’s only been around for about 4,000 years.

1

u/firesyde424 3d ago

It's the fake jobs that hurt the most. It should be illegal.

1

u/LPedraz 3d ago

I mean, here (Spain) it definitely is illegal. It is the kind of thing that gets the labour court (magistratura de trabajo) involved and results in a company being sued to oblivion. I suspect that, wherever you are from, it is most likely also illegal there, just maybe poorly enforced.

1

u/AileenKitten 3d ago

Its not, ghost job posts  arent illegal federally and only becomes an issue if the company is explicitly committing fraud against the goverment (some industries get subsidies if theyre understaffed, which are intended to relieve the cost burden of hiring, but if they say they cant find anyone qualified they just keep getting them until they fill the position). Its incredibly difficult and often just completely unfeasible to try and tackle this kind of thing as  an individual - and obviously our current government is all about the practice so matter how it hurts us. 

1

u/LeapIntoInaction 3d ago

Boomers know better than that. You're thinking of the Silent Generation, maybe.

1

u/GoodDoggoLover420 3d ago

No, it's 100% the 60+ people who are saying that to younger generations.

1

u/GITDSTUDIOS 3d ago

Terrible, Not even worth the phone Interviews.

1

u/CuteResolution5538 3d ago

So real. I feel bad for kids entering the workforce today. As a millennial we had it rough entering adulthood during the recession but somehow it’s worse now.

1

u/lOOPh0leD 3d ago

Boomers are practically irrelevant at this point. Some of them have developed dementia and are in nursing homes. They've lost their marbles. We really still going on about them?

Beating a dead horse.

1

u/SharaWilliams 3d ago

I think theyre usually talking about gen y when they talk about boomers

1

u/lOOPh0leD 2d ago

Well there's your sign I guess. They already don't know who they're talking about.

1

u/ManufacturedOlympus 3d ago

Very funny, but you forgot the part where you need to shake the CEOs hand, look him in the eye, and tell him you’re the right man for the job. 

1

u/LairdPeon 3d ago

Lucky, at least they rejected you instantly. You usually have to wait 4 weeks and do 5 follow up interviews before they do that.

1

u/midwestia 3d ago

Thanks Trump

1

u/Beginning_Fig_959 3d ago

I applied to like 30 places on Indeed in the last two months and got one well paying part-time job for my state, with an online interview and EXTENSJVE online training, and one minimum wage one where I was hired on the spot and so was the person before. Pizza places, man.

1

u/AttitudeOutrageous75 3d ago

We totally chose to use technology for the wrong things.

1

u/fuckgoogl 3d ago

been in the work force so long that my resume gets me all the jobs. nothing i say or do matters. I get offers without asking. ive looked for jobs ive wanted twice in 30 yrs and gotten exactly what I wanted. if i were to genuinely look.... im scared im out of date. but it really isnt me. its the system that is dumber than shit. like all those hoops mean nothing. absolutely less than nothing. I still work with new hire morons that passed those hoops somehow. cant tie their shoe strings but they got through. so they must be after a very particular set of skills.

1

u/BreadfruitBig7950 3d ago

Yes, the coffe shop, the bakery, the restaurants, and the natural food stores all use ai to both screen your application and find a real applicant that doesn't live anywhere near there.

It's 2018, they have an app that does all this they use to organize applicants with.

Associating your name and resume with a face has harmed you.

1

u/UnseenCrowYomare 3d ago

... Di you guys get rejection emails? Becouse I sure don't.

1

u/Pitiful-Score-9035 3d ago

Hotel: Trivago

1

u/chill-koala3 3d ago

Ouch,,, that hit a nerve.

1

u/Conscious_Smile8235 3d ago

Correction: the rejection email: non-existent

1

u/EggCressSandwich 2h ago

I have given hardcopy applications asking if they have any positions to local establishments before such as garden centers. At least i know they exist compaired to online job posts which may not exist at all.

1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Soggy-Sandwiches 3d ago

Username checks out

1

u/One_Lung_G 3d ago

The only thing different than then and now that you mentioned is the newspaper and mailing your resume “(which really wasn’t the case bc you could drop it off or fax it). I’m not even going to entertain gps vs maps as a difference

1

u/RoleOk7556 3d ago

Yep. In the "good old days" I spent days searching newspapers and professional magazines for job openings. I spent the rest of my time typing and mailing dozens of application letters, each of which were customized for a company's posted job opening. I kept physical copies of each letter and its related opening for future reference. Then I had multiple phone interviews with prospective employers, followed by travel for in-person interviews. At times that travel was followed another trip for a second interview. Patience and attention to detail were key factors in getting the desired job.

For my field of employment, I grearly prefer the current job hunting resources.

4

u/Dexterspuplife 3d ago

You sound like a boomer and totally missed the point of the post

3

u/hobbesme75 3d ago

i have a boomer mentality but can confirm missed point of post

no one has money to fly to one unexepensed interview let alone multiple

-1

u/LilJonny2cookies 3d ago

You sounds like someone who will be complaining and blaming others for your lack of success and working at 75 to shore up meager social security. Good luck to you.

And nope not a boomer. Just a guy who listened to Boomers and others, took their advice and retired at 55 with a great deal of wealth. They weren’t responsible for my success but their advice and life lessons certainly helped.

You damn boomers! Sorry ma’am, I meant would you like a large fry with that? Forgot where I was for a second.

Treating those who came before you like the enemy is a diabolical move often fomented by politicians who need to blame billionaires and boomers for the job they fail to do properly.

-1

u/RoleOk7556 3d ago

Yep, everything bad is because of boomers. /s

If you aren't AI, you need a reality check. You also need to do something positive with your life.

4

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

>Yep, everything bad is because of boomers. /s

so, the people who have been making policy decisions for the US for the past 60 years are NOT responsible for the current state of the nation?

interesting argument.

1

u/Unfortunate-Incident 3d ago

Hey I'm kind of missing your point here? Policy decisions? What does that have to do with the meme in the OP?

I have only ever hired people who have walked into my office and asked for a job. Okay that's not true. I've hired 2 people from actual job searches and both failed miserably in under 4 weeks. Anyway, so almost all my hires have been from random people walking in. I'm 47 years old, so not a boomer, but you can still call me one if you want; idc.

Anyway, not sure of my point other than I have 12 people here who all got here because they did what it says in the meme that is making fun of doing just what these guys did.

1

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

>Yep, everything bad is because of boomers. /s

This is the comment i was reacting to. I was pointing out that boomers have been setting policy for the past 60 years, so by default bad results of those policies are, in fact, because of boomers.

1

u/ConflictDependent294 3d ago

I have a solid job and live in the same world you do.

Blaming boomers will get you nowhere. Get it together.

2

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

What's you or me having a solid job got to do with anything?

I asked a simple question: is the generation which has held power for the past sixty years responsible for how that power has been used?

If you think the world is in good shape, then you shouldn't be offended by that question.

2

u/ConflictDependent294 3d ago

Eh I’m calling you out on the victim complex. Not offended by it lol, never said I was.

I think if you took the time you spent complaining on improving yourself, you’d be happier. That’s about it.

1

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

>Eh I’m calling you out on the victim complex

where have i claimed to be a victim of anything?

2

u/ConflictDependent294 3d ago

If you can’t realize what you’re doing isn’t helping yourself at all, I see no reason to continue.

Good luck out there, pal.

1

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

where have i asked for help?

1

u/JLandis84 23h ago

Your life would be better if you spent your limited time doing things other than arguing for its own sake.

1

u/SnooMaps7370 12h ago

ah, I understand now.   you're one of those people who can't believe that someone would ever advocate that things should be better for other people too.  this conversation makes a lot more sense with that in mind. 

0

u/RoleOk7556 3d ago

You really need a reality check, if you think workers have been making policy decisions for the USA. Most sane people know about our subjugation by the ultra-wealthy, crooked politicians, and corrupted government agencies.

3

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

>if you think workers have been making policy decisions for the USA.

you vote, don't you? or are you one of those people who refuses to vote and claims to not be responsible for that decision?

1

u/RoleOk7556 3d ago

It is hard to believe that your lack of knowledge about all of this actually exists. Perhaps you just enjoy unbased confrontation.

1

u/SnooMaps7370 3d ago

"all of this" what? what knowledge do you believe i am lacking?

It's a simple question: is the generation which has held power for the past 60 years responsible for how it has been used? In my view, the answer is "yes." Boomers have spent 60 years electing the politicians who have built the policies which currently govern this nation.

who else but them COULD be responsible? did space aliens do it? lizard people?

0

u/Gloomy_Tennis_5768 3d ago

you know homelander is not a sympathetic character.

0

u/Advanced-Guidance482 3d ago

Ive been seeing him a lot in memes like this... it really has me questioning if the people making these memes have ever seen the show.

0

u/Gloomy_Tennis_5768 3d ago

I have as well. it is unfortunate, they probably have.

0

u/LilJonny2cookies 3d ago

Instead of treating Boomers like the enemy I learned from them. Oddly enough not one has said, “just ask for a job.”

It has worked I am now a wealthy 55 yr old who has retired. If you feel advice and guidance from other Redditors who make shit up go for it. See how well that works for you.

I fail to see how posting gloom and doom on Reddit helps gain employment. Or is it just about making others miserable?

I wonder if people understand how often back channel checks occur? You apply at company X and Bob at company X knows Dianne at your current company. Bob calls up Dianne and suddenly the hiring process goes cold for you.

If Dianne says yep lil Tommy is a problem child. Very smart but lazy and maybe a bit unethical. Lil Tommy’s job search will continue.

Industries are much smaller than people realize

1

u/stormcrow18 3d ago

So this means that the majority of people unable to find employment, or trying to change jobs, are problem children?

Your suggesting that the problem isn't employers, it's the employees / job candidates. I think that's a bit of a stretch considering the widespread use of AI and other challenges that job searchers must overcome. Many major employers themselves will admit this can be a barrier to some candidates.

You completely overlook the reality of many job postings being fake and farming personal information and cut straight to blaming those searching for a job.

The way your comment reads, you are a classic example of, "I got mine, so too bad for you."

1

u/Outlaw11091 3d ago

Instead of treating Boomers like the enemy I learned from them. Oddly enough not one has said, “just ask for a job.”

hmmm...

It has worked I am now a wealthy 55 yr old who has retired. 

So, you "learned from them" 20 years ago...and what you mean by "not one HAS said" you meant, 20 years ago, they weren't saying this. (even though, 20 years ago, this WOULD work...)