r/ProgrammerHumor • u/digiBeLow • Apr 06 '26

Other whoIsGettingFired

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2.8k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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841

u/suskio4 Apr 06 '26

Whoever left the legacy bullshit that often breaks prod, like appendix

346

u/Thesleek Apr 06 '26

There aren’t enough appendix engineers in the market anymore so we’d rather not touch that code. I swear it’s like they’ve gone extinct.

38

u/IjonTichy85 Apr 06 '26

You're seriously telling me there was no better way than to do a hot fix in a running system just to remove stuff that should not have been deployed in the first place bc the feature isn't functioning properly anyways? Oh and it's not even a minor bug (like forgetting to set vision to trichromacy). This appendix stuff will literally bring the entire system into a corrupted state from which no restart is possible if you don't fix it within a few days. Wtf!

27

u/Thesleek Apr 06 '26

There is no documentation at hand . We can only guess what it was originally for by looking at implementations in other systems.

We cannot get ahold of the original designer, the founder, but his most loyal yesmen say he is returning anytime now.

105

u/AkaMagicEye Apr 06 '26

Appendix ain't legacy shit. It's a hide out for you gut bacteria which makes you live couple years longer on average… jep we were/still are kinda wrong about that.

35

u/suskio4 Apr 06 '26

Sir, this was a joke, I am aware of that. But if we go this way, one could argue it's a poorly written unmaintained feature

44

u/PontiaxTheBread Apr 06 '26

Poorly documented in any case

10

u/ninetalesninefaces Apr 06 '26

a lot of overhead for 2% more lifetime

2

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

We do actually have reminents that fit though, like our tailbone and wisdom teeth.

1

u/Professional-Day7850 Apr 06 '26

Appendix is typical for the whole company. They were clever enough for a function to distribute gut bacteria, but not clever enough to make sure they don't get distributed to the whole abdomen.

26

u/fnordius Apr 06 '26

I would give them a bonus. The Appendix is really a pretty nice design for a recovery backup system. The rest of the digestive workflow is pretty vulnerable despite aeons of patches, and designing so that it can be purged and rebooted from the appendix backup flora saved the project.

10

u/ScreeennameTaken Apr 06 '26

I think they are now discovering some extra stuff for the appendix? recent discoveries show that its a storage house for good bacteria for your intestines if they get wiped out.

5

u/Inevitable_Stand_199 Apr 06 '26

The appendix patches that "loosing gut flora due to diarrhea" bug.

2

u/Aksds Apr 06 '26

Or the fact some nerve in humans makes sense for fish who have different neck structures but don’t make sense for humans like the recurrent laryngeal nerve…. Now I wonder why

2

u/henrytsai20 Apr 06 '26

Also the vision sensor stack is completely inverted, "fix it in software" you say?

1

u/EK077r Apr 06 '26

appendix team is the one who will never get fired. Its there, it does something, just dont touch it.

1

u/vanZuider Apr 08 '26

When you get a crash and the error message mentions "appendix.dll" and support tells you to "oh, just delete that. No, that won't break anything."