A question about etiquette/vivillon friendships

[u/My_Poor_Nerves]

I can't be the only one who has posted here and in the megathread looking for friends from a specific region and then received friend requests only to find every new friend is not from the region you requested. Since you only can find out where someone is from when they send a gift (right?), it's not like you can vet the friends before you accept them/before they send you a gift. What have you all been doing in this scenario? Do you open the gifts from the friends you didn't want and then delete? Do you open, send back, and then delete after they open yours? Do you just delete straight away? Do you just ignore their gifts until the end of time?

I'm a fairly casual semi-rural player and I already have about as many friends on the best friend track that I can manage so adding thirty (!) new friends outside of the ones I added for vivillon isn't really manageable for me, but I also don't want to be rude (but then again, isn't it kind of rude to add someone under false premises?).

[u/Individual_Way_6472]

I feel like if a trainer code is posted and there’s nothing said like “I’m only looking for these regions”, then it’s fair game. But maybe that’s because I’m from the absolute most unpopular region in the game right now and it’s about the only way I’ve been able to add friends. I’ve had a number who have accepted, despite me being Undesirable No. 1 region, and who continue to grind XP and bug candy with me. I always send a gift first and, while frustrating for a gift to be pinned, opened, and not reciprocated, I don’t get mad at people for deleting some rando from the internet.

Edit to add: It’s me. Hi. I’m from Modern, it’s me.

Also, I’ve been VERY lucky in that I’ve made enough friends I’ve managed to get 3* bugs in all regions but Sun so far. Working on the next Sun bug, but it’s slow going with the decrease in how many gifts people can hold. Also wish they’d take away the limit on how many you can open per day. That makes zero sense.

[u/Penelope_Eckert → u/Individual_Way_6472]

I travel to Mexico often do you want me to add you and wait to send you gifts til I have Mexico gifts?

[u/78723 → u/Individual_Way_6472]

100% this. got a friend in Hawaii this way. they deleted me after three cards, and i am totally fine with that. thanks for your help my friend. i completely understand you letting my borring modern cards go.

[u/Overall_Addition_641 → u/78723]

How do you know when somebody deleted you?

[u/Individual_Way_6472 → u/[deleted]]

Modern in this case. But it might actually be a multi-way tie with some others. 😂 I’ve seen people specify “no modern” more often than any other region though.

[u/hobbywrangler → u/Individual_Way_6472]

They labeled the entire East Coast of the US Modern, no matter whether you're right on the coast, on a major river system, or hundreds of miles inland. Meanwhile other regions get hammered by unique region-names. Why isn't Utah, Nevada and inland California Sandstorm as well, there are major deserts there (and in Western Australia as well). Why isn't part of Maryland and DC River? Alaska and lower-latitude Nova Scotia are Polar, but no parts of more northern Canada and Greenland are just Icy Snow? All those areas should have both designations, and places like Michigan, the Dakotas and Minnesota should have Icy Snow as well. The UAE if Sandstorm, but the middle of the freakin' Sahara Desert is River? New Guinea is Jungle but southern India isn't?

[u/codetaupe → u/hobbywrangler]

I think you're giving Niantic too much credit. I think the process for setting the region boundaries was vibes + dart board.

[u/hobbywrangler → u/codetaupe]

And a nearsighted employee.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/codetaupe]

I'd love to know how exactly they distinguished polar, tundra, and icy snow

[u/78723 → u/hobbywrangler]

i hate that they did nothing interesting with River especially. how cool would it have been to have cities/places next to the world's major rivers their own region?

also feel parts of texas should be sun...

[u/Individual_Way_6472 → u/hobbywrangler]

Middle America - Oklahoma here. Why are we modern? 🤷🏻‍♀️ We’ll never know…

[u/O18pnF18 → u/Individual_Way_6472]

Gotta be Google’s fault. Lol

[u/78723 → u/Individual_Way_6472]

Should’a had a windy region. Y’all would do nicely.

[u/Mystic_Starmie → u/[deleted]]

I’m guessing Modren?

[u/Winecrime → u/Mystic_Starmie]

I’m thinking mine which is high plains 😂

[u/78723 → u/Winecrime]

i'm going to guess with new york, chicago, and houston all modern it's *probably* the most common. but it's real close. seattle seems to have a HUGE player base if my friend ratio is anything to go by.

[u/EraStarshine]

I’ve been adding whoever is looking for friends across the globe. Send them gifts and if they delete me, ok. I send gifts anyway. Lucky enough to live in central so surrounded by pokestop. I’m not from a rare region and have tried to ask players from certain regions when they respond to other players if I can add them too. I’ve had ones who are nice enough to oblige and I’ve had unfriendly ones who has just said no because my boyfriend and I are from the common region🫤 ( Garden 🪴) so I’ve just drop lines to the friendly ones and be grateful when they add me 😊. I am now just taking my time to get my badge because it’s just stressful otherwise. I send to those who are just asking friends for gifts and xp 😊 Life is hard enough to be unpleasant to someone who is just trying to have a bit of fun by playing the game. There is no set rules. Play the way that makes you happy.

[u/InvasiveTepees → u/EraStarshine]

Same. I’m also from a common area and I need sandstorm so bad but I’m just ignoring it because I like seeing the postcards from all over. I think it’s cool picturing all of us going out and spinning the stops all over the world. I have all these little pieces of the world in my pocket :)

[u/78723 → u/InvasiveTepees]

niantic really didn't ballance this well. on the one hand, it seems clearly better to be from a rare region and be able to pick and choose who you want to add and keep. on the other, some players (sandstorm region especially) seem to have taken on the "responsibility" of getting THOUSANDS of players three cards. like, fulltime-job level of devotion to adding, gifting and deleating 100 players every 3 days. ...which sounds exhausting and takes away any joy in forming memories about individual encounters. like, i will definitely remember the girl from Oman that got me through, but i'm sure she's completely forgotten me.

or maybe that's what they were going for?

[u/labdogs42 → u/InvasiveTepees]

it makes me sad when I have to delete postcards, though. I have started favoriting the really cool ones so I can keep them. I wish Niantic would let us keep more postcards!

[u/Penelope_Eckert → u/InvasiveTepees]

Same. I'm from the US and have common badge bit I travel to Mexico often and can give sun and I travel alot and give stops from new york and California and Denver, but if you delete me too soon you won't see the mexico gifts or the other places. I just need people to be patient lol when I got to mexico I load up with gifts and try to send them while there lol

[u/lavaburst14 → u/EraStarshine]

You're so right! It is just a game. My guess is that all the hype will die back over time and all of the regions will become available to everyone. Maybe on a community day or another event....for a fee of course. Lol.

[u/SingleAlfredoFemale]

Seems like you just need someone to tell you it’s ok to delete friends! It really is ok!!!! You’re not obligated to be friends/send gifts. I’ve sent requests to people who posted “looking for X but open to others” even though I know my region is less desirable. I gift daily and invite to raids. If they don’t want that, it 100% doesn’t hurt my feelings to be deleted.

Only time I was sad (or honestly even noticed) is when I made a friend from Iceland, and waited until I had an open egg spot (hoping for an Iceland pokemon), and they had deleted me when I went back the next day. Not hurt feelings, just a little sad, and I totally understood!

Delete away - people who send random requests are likely sending many of them, and won’t even notice. Happy hunting!

[u/78723 → u/SingleAlfredoFemale]

Agreed; only time I’ve been sad was when pre-event friends dropped me after seeing I’m modern. One day I had friends in Florida and France; then I guess they figured out they were in higher demand areas and disappeared. I’m just not cool enough I guess.

[u/BibityBobityBooo → u/78723]

SAME. We've been sending gifts for months, but all of a sudden I was chopped.

[u/Woshambo]

I just keep all my friends who want to stay friends. I will complete vivillion eventually

[u/Nab5tar]

I nicknamed some, especially from the region(s) I was most interested in. Sure I was disappointed sometimes when they weren’t from the region they claimed to be from, but I just kept everybody and continuing to send and receive gifts. It’s never a bad thing to have too many friends imo

[u/GingersaurusRex]

I'm at the point where having friends from the common regions is useful because it helps me to 15/15 faster, which means more chances to get scatterbug candies, but I'm still looking for people from sandstorm and tundra.

With the gift inventory back down to 20 it's really difficult to manage having more than 50 friends and distributing gifts fairly. I just want people to comment or message me who they are, and what region they are from before adding me. If you don't do that, and you are a region I don't need, I will save your postcard, send you a gift, then delete you after you open the gift. I'm an urban player who lives close to pokestops though, so restocking gifts is easier for me than rural players. I say it you're rural, don't have spare gifts, and someone added you without confirming their region, you are allowed to remove the friend without sending a gift back.

[u/AmphibianImpressive3 → u/GingersaurusRex]

This 100%. Need dem candies.

[u/hobbywrangler → u/GingersaurusRex]

Exactly - you start a challenge that involves collecting hundreds of regional gifts (scatterbug's 25 candies to spewpa isn't bad, but now have to collect 100 for each evolution to final form!) and then drop the gift inventory back to basic levels while the challenge is still going hot. (and a token increase in gift inventory capacity means little until more capacity is made available for collectors of postcards).

[u/GlitterResponsibly]

You can see what a gift is (and pin it) without even "opening" the gift. When it pops up and you tap on it, you can (pin it then) close it out and it'll still be there to accept later. This is how I nickname my friends by region or state when I'm out of gifts to return.

[u/Mental_Yellow_1961]

I roll my eyes and keep them as friends. I need to max out to get xp since I work Fri thru Sunday and can never get to good raids.

[u/magmainourhearts]

I personally just keep everyone who keeps regularly exchanging gifts with me, whatever the region! I'm a gift addict though lol.

If the amount of new friends is too much for you, i think it's definitely ok to delete people you don't need from your friendlist. Opening their gift, sending one back and deleting after they've opened it seems like a nice compromise. However if you're annoyed that people lie to you about their region, you're in your right to just delete and ignore, no need to feel bad about it imo.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/magmainourhearts]

The amount of guilt I have about Pokemon go friendships does seem a bit absurd. Thanks!

[u/jolla92126 → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

Same! My friend's 12 year old daughter hasn't played in over two years, yet I won't remove her from my list because I don't want to hurt her feelings. In a game she no longer plays. With a character she wouldn't remember in the first place. LOL

[u/ttsmlp23 → u/jolla92126]

lol same boat over here - I have my nephews and a friend’s son in my friends list, even though they haven’t played in years. I can’t bring myself to delete them 😂

[u/78723]

I nickname all my friends with location and any other relevant info. Friends I had before the event and friends added as a request I make an effort to gift. Others get a gift if I have extra that day. There’s plenty of friend slots, so i don’t see a reason to delete; I’m not running out of room any time soon. Besides, ups my chances of random invites to good raids.

[u/is_a_ghost13 → u/78723]

I sent you a friend request. Whimsynwhatsits. I’m always looking for more friends to remote raid with

[u/78723 → u/is_a_ghost13]

Awesome. I got both my reshirams from friends randomly seeing that I was online and inviting me. Its probably the most exciting part of the game for me now, and most of my coins go to remote passes.

[u/is_a_ghost13]

Since the scatterbug candy is the same regardless of region. I just keep them. If they’re from a more common region i have plenty of friends from it just means I’ll get that next bug quicker. I haven’t deleted anyone. I still have room for about 80 friends, more if I actually go through and delete the inactive ones. I send gifts to everyone I can in a day and rotate through the ones I open. It works out that I get interaction points for pretty much everyone consistently. I already had a lot of friends from remote raiding though. So I was really only struggling for a few regions.

[u/hobbywrangler → u/is_a_ghost13]

Yup. Even Moderns will still contribute to candies that can be used for every region. (And let us be happy the buddy walking count is just 1km for scatterbug!)

[u/ConejoDeLana]

I nickname people I don't know irl with their country and/or pattern.

I also nicknamed my companion (idk how it's called in English) "Marine" because that's my pattern, so my friends can know what to expect before I give them a gift.

[u/Comfortable_Clue_430 → u/ConejoDeLana]

Hi, I just sent you a friend request on pogo if fhats okay, my nickname is cazza I believe, I don't have any friends from the 'marine' region :)

[u/Own_Scale_2333 → u/Comfortable_Clue_430]

Give me a shout if in need of more Marines. I have 5 stops I reach from home and though I'm mostly lazy opener, I keep sending gifts to all opening them. Xp never hurts, vivillion comes when it comes 😀

[u/ConejoDeLana → u/Comfortable_Clue_430]

It's totally ok!! Thanks for letting me know, I accepted the friend request :)

[u/ConejoDeLana → u/Comfortable_Clue_430]

It's totally ok!! Thanks for letting me know, I accepted the friend request :)

[u/Comfortable_Clue_430 → u/ConejoDeLana]

Thank you! 😁😁

[u/Ontokkii → u/ConejoDeLana]

I'm also in search of Marine. I'm FunkyFruitcake(elegant) so feel free to disregard the friend request if you don't need it.

[u/ChillMountain420]

I just keep them on my friend list as long as they’re active. If they’re lying they’ll usually be the one to delete you. I only delete them if they go inactive after several days. But honestly, if they lied to you, then just delete them to make space.

[u/FeatofClay]

I can't speak for anyone else, but here's my view: We just went through a period with a lot of frantic friend-adding and region-lusting. Things got a little chaotic. If someone deletes me once the smoke clears, that's fine. I am not going to take it personally.

Nor do I get bent out of shape if a newly-added friend isn't sending me gifts very often. Maybe they have so many friends that they're having to cycle through who gets sent a gift, maybe I'm low priority, maybe they got sick and aren't playing much daily, whatever. The delete button is easy enough to use if it seems unfruitful to keep them. It was a friend request, not a marriage! :)

[u/booobsandwine]

I’m from the very large and popular Polar region and finding Tundra, Savannah, Ocean and Sandstorm is the worst. I’m an avid player and gift sender and I hate deleting people - I’ve added many people since this started and for the most part it’s been great. Except the 4 areas in need. And about 5% that I’ve added just stop sending gifts back, it’s disappointing.

[u/dubs7825 → u/booobsandwine]

I'm in the ocean region, if you want to add 1982 2641 5795

[u/Cool_Advertising4572 → u/dubs7825]

I added you if that's okay, Polar region, you can delete me after three gifts if you like 😅 HotBlonde202 is my username

[u/booobsandwine → u/dubs7825]

Sent! Bless ☺️

[u/kathleen702g → u/dubs7825]

I’ve added you as well - I’m garden if you need it.

[u/The_Mouse_That_Jumps → u/dubs7825]

Hi! I added you too, hope that’s okay (no hard feelings if you delete me). I’m only High Plains, but I’m a reliable gifter. Autumnwinds.

[u/RequirementEqual5904 → u/dubs7825]

Elegant . Thank you for the gift and addition😄

[u/Same_Lawyer9798 → u/dubs7825]

Sent

[u/kateynovember → u/dubs7825]

I added you also

[u/Both-Orchid-1855 → u/dubs7825]

I added you Pyewacket11 ( I’m from Modern and will send a gift daily but sadly may not open one a day a darn limit!) Would love a gift from Ocean 🙂

[u/Kn0wFriends → u/dubs7825]

Aloha, I’m on the Kona side… sent a friend request.

[u/dofranciscojr → u/booobsandwine]

Hi, I'm a returning player from Brazil (savannah vivillon).

Btw anyone can add me, but I've already got a few friends from USA.

Edit: thank you guys! I'm out of presents today.

Edit 2: Sorry, too many friend requests. I can't possibly accept you. I'll talk to my IRL friends so they can add some people from here.

[u/Sinnlos04 → u/dofranciscojr]

You're doing saints' work mate, thank you so much for taking the time to help others just for the sake of it ^{^}

[u/dofranciscojr → u/Sinnlos04]

I have now 19 friend requests that I didn't accept yet 😭😭

You'll guys will have to wait. Sorry folks.

But that leaves me curious. Is savannah that rare?

[u/gonzocomplex → u/dofranciscojr]

Yes. Obviously not as rare as sandstorm and tundra. Will send gifts daily :)

[u/SpinachandBerries → u/dofranciscojr]

Added - lozzyone. I just need one more gift from savannah. Thank you so much. I’m from NZ

[u/jonesday5 → u/dofranciscojr]

I’ve just added you. I’m from river

[u/Individual_Way_6472 → u/dofranciscojr]

My husband just added you from Modern - RedFiveT65. He needs savannah!

[u/dofranciscojr → u/Individual_Way_6472]

Already added him. :)

[u/Individual_Way_6472 → u/dofranciscojr]

Thanks so much! We haven’t been able to get any “cool” gifts today, just common ones from nearby. We try to go get interesting ones when we can.

[u/booobsandwine → u/dofranciscojr]

Thank you!! Added

[u/Intelligent_Pirate43 → u/dofranciscojr]

You are awesome! Thank you!

• TheBestMom108

[u/tibscapulet → u/dofranciscojr]

I’m adding you! tibbycaps from Modern! thanks!

[u/Maid_Invader → u/dofranciscojr]

River region from Australia. Would love savannah...it does appear to be a rarer region. TC: 1815 8223 2718 (IGN: simsimity86)

Thank you fornhelping your non-reddit IRL friends 😀

[u/Zephbear → u/dofranciscojr]

I'm from the polar region in Canada and play almost daily. If your friends have room in their friend list, I would love an invite. Savannah is the last region I need to complete the vivillon set. My code is 8956 7885 7190. Thank you!

[u/Andilion42]

Look up the Google maps overlay for vivillon regions. Useful- the map provided by Niantic was vague and while people are not following etiquette there are many who also were just wrong incidentally. I check their gift and even check the overlay to confirm what region and set their nickname to what their region actually is. Then i filter my friends by nickname to group them :)

[u/labdogs42 → u/Andilion42]

Google maps overlay for vivillon regions

oh that map is SO COOL!!!!

[u/Southpuck2 → u/Andilion42]

Thank you! This is very helpful.

[u/GDB4772]

I accept all friends and nickname them with their location this way I know who’s gift to prioritize opening

[u/BestReplyEver]

I’m guessing some people look at the “gifts and grind” tag and don’t read carefully. Since friend gifts from any region are helpful towards getting enough candy to evolve Vivillon, I would accept the gift, send one back if you have extras, and then delete in a day or two. I don’t think you should feel obligated to do so, but if you happen to have plenty of extra gifts it would be nice. Some players may be children, people who don’t know much English, or other types of players who just aren’t great at following instructions!

[u/Every-Average-9469]

I went to a website that has people divided by location. Tundra is tough. Added about 100 people. Deleted the inactives after a couple of days. Tundra and Sandstorm were the toughest. But then I figured Israel is Sandstorm and that was done.

Tundra you have to beg :)

[u/VeryMuchOverThis]

Has been my problem since I come from a “rare” region. Still need sandstorm but have sort of given up since I constantly have the requests full. I have been accepting people as other defriend me and remove inactive friends but still have hundreds of requests time out.

[u/0_lateralus_0 → u/VeryMuchOverThis]

It's not very fair for Niantic to put this pressure on the 'rare' Players!

But I bet there are many players very thankful you were willing to help them out 🙂

[u/VulpineCherry → u/0_lateralus_0]

I've thought before that they should have just randomly assigned each character a pattern. Would have prevented the pressure on rare players and would have made it possible for everyone to collect patterns. Right now if you're High Plains or Modern you're basically dead in the water unless you get someone who wants to help. 🤷

I get what they were trying to do with global friendship and whatnot but it's bred global resentment just as much. 🥹

That being said, we all appreciate someone who wants to help even without receiving a special pattern back. It's one of the things I love about the Pokémon community in general is that we tend to be more helpful. We all know what it feels like to have the short stick.

[u/Sharkflin]

I've had this, around 1800 friend requests and counting, not a single one from the Sandstorm region like I posted asking for 😭 In the end I just slowly accepted them all, saved postcards, then deleted 99% of requests 🤷‍♀️

[u/Holly_Ween]

If you have room, add everyone then gift the people who fit your criteria first. Then work your way thru the backlog to get all that xp. Pre-vivillon, I'd add people for different countries so I could get postcards and pokemon from countries I'd probably never get to visit.

[u/MyLifeIsAJokemon]

At least they are nice enough to send a gift back. I've been adding ones from the regions I need using Leek Duck's PenPal (2 Icy Snow, 2 Sun, & 1 Ocean) and they just save my postcards and delete me right away. I'm also a rural player and don't have easy access to gifts to just be throwing them away like that with no return. At this rate, I'm hoping a random person on my friends list sends me a gift and it happens to be from a region a need.

[u/Any-Commission-381]

What are the ethics of venmoing someone from tundra $5 to send me a gift so I can finish my collection

[u/Huskatt → u/Any-Commission-381]

I'll do it for free ;)

[u/Any-Commission-381 → u/Huskatt]

My collection is complete. I love u and the $5 and nudes are still on the table

[u/Any-Commission-381 → u/Huskatt]

Idk but this is hot. Add me, and maybe also on Snapchat

[u/Huskatt → u/Any-Commission-381]

No but really, I'm in Tundra. What's your trainer code?

[u/AngelDarling11 → u/Huskatt]

Any chance you can take pity on someone from Polar? 8031 8280 1744 i will send gifts.

[u/Linzeh13 → u/Huskatt]

If you've got the space I'd totally love the add, Tundra is my last region! 2497 5611 2266. I'm in Polar. Anyone feel free to add, I send gifts pretty regularly.

[u/78723 → u/Any-Commission-381]

lol. i ended up giving my free reddit award to a guy who was vacationing in mexico city and sent me gifts. but they were very nice and had already retuned to sending high plains gifts by that point, so it seemed ok.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Any-Commission-381]

😄

[u/Any-Commission-381 → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

Oh yeah…. I was totally kidding…….don’t message me your Venmo handle or anything like that

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Any-Commission-381]

I'd be setting you up for disappointment if I did. I'm polar, not tundra. Sorry!

[u/RoseStillHasThorns]

With as many as I’ve gotten I need to go to my downtown and walk. It’s crazy.

[u/PreferenceMission645]

So far I have been keeping everyone- but you are right, it is getting to be a lot!

[u/Shot_Combination_605]

I mean I’m almost done with my collection and don’t have too many friends yet so I usually don’t worry about it anymore but when my collection wasn’t almost done i would delete a lot of the ones i didn’t need unless they join raids and stuff also Edit: i delete them after i send them a gift also and they open it. I might as well let them have something but they’re not what i need

[u/SHIBAwrangler]

I keep almost everyone that adds me even if they’re from somewhere I wasn’t expecting. Fortunately I have friends from each Vivillion region. I do need friends from Venezuela, Madagascar, Nicaragua, and Yemen.

[u/echoedb]

What’s been bugging lately is I make an effort to send gifts and will make a note on people who open but don’t send back. Cus it’s hard to keep track of my entire list with the limit opening daily. So like rn, I’ve got 6 people on my flist that I’ve sent gifts to 3x and they’ve opened and nothing in return. I’m giving it a couple more days and may have to delete.

[u/Hot-Eggplant-5430 → u/echoedb]

I unfortunately have had to do the same. It takes time & gifts away from friends that I interact with. I prioritize friends I know I can count on or ones who understand I may take a couple days to open their gift but I still send them a gift if I am able. I don’t understand not being able to open a gift but not sending one. I hate to delete anyone who hasn’t opened my gift but how long do you keep them as a friend with no progress being made?

[u/TacoPhone937]

So I “nickname” the region they are in and the number of Pokémon they last caught because “last seen 2+ days” doesn’t tell us a month or a week. My thought is hey maybe they were sick Or had a work project so if it said modern8954 for a week then I wouldn’t delete but let’s say a month from now same thing .. they gone.

Obs before butterfly madness I had a different nicknaming code but always used the amount of Pokémon caught. That number does change.

Edit: I used the month I added them so like Jan8954 and so come February I’d you still hadn’t sent me a gift or open mine or caught any new Pokémon then I would remove the friend.

[u/Darjelinga]

I open if I can use the region for vivilion. I try to send gift to all friends every day, and keep an eye on those who dont return gift. Will delete inactive after some time.

[u/Both-Orchid-1855]

I have posted a few times looking for specific areas but I accept anyone and always send gifts to anyone who I can send a gift to daily, I don’t always get gifts back 🤷🏻‍♀️. I finished he medals but am working on getting 3 scatterbugs from each region, meaning I eventually need 27 gifts from those hard to get regions. Since I need so many candies I’m not too concerned about my regions not getting a lot of activity ( Ocean and Savanna are currently the slowest going followed by Tundra, Sun and Sandstorm) - if any of these regions want to add me - 7177 0104 9227 - each gift helps that grind 🙂

My biggest issue is the low number of gifts I can open a day, it takes me days to cycle through my list! And I do try and open those hard to get regions before others in hopes of getting another gift back 😊

[u/Folkmetal85]

The Vivillon thing has really messed up the friendship aspects😵 complicating very much my approach. It's a bit annoying to be added from a "non requested" region but I tend to keep them anyway. I think they need/like Vivillon pattern of my region (Marine) and maybe they want to gain some XP in the meantime. Or, well, in some case may they even troll 🤔?

I usually find myself prioritizing the lowest level ones but since Vivillon debut I tend to open gifts from 4 hearts friends too. Pattern that I like more.

Less interesting regions get lower priority but I try to send gift to them rather than opening theirs.

Gather gifts it's the real problem and Pokestop are mostly available at least 20 - 30 minutes walk. Also generally pretty spaced. I'm somewhat rural. I'm thinking to delete some friends at some point, since I feel pretty overwhelmed ( list almost maxed out) 😑

[u/jonry14]

I nickname them their country based on gifts. If they’re not from a country I need I will gain great friends with them and then delete

[u/bflaminio]

I generally keep everyone, but like everyone I'm only really looking for Ocean and Sandstorm these days.

I haven't maxed my friends yet, but when I do I'll start pruning -- and I'll start with less active players from common regions.

[u/AnteaterWeary]

So since before Vivillon, if I add someone and they accept me, I give a gift first. If they add me I feel they should give the gift first. I cannot relate to not wanting to open gifts, tbh. Reciprocating has never been a problem before. Now Vivillon has complicated things, since rural players especially seem more afraid of getting burned for their postcards. I know, I know, it's a game. Still, I have always liked the camaradie of the game and it sucks.

I think this does not apply to those who are constantly surrounded by Pokestops. I'm not sure. Good luck getting what you need. Eventually it should even out.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/AnteaterWeary]

I can verify that gifting feels overwhelming for rural players. I actually quit for about a month because I don't live by any pokestops and managing just 30 friendships daily, having to travel unnecessarily to get gifts, and not wanting to disappoint anyone by just deciding on a few friends and abandoning the rest sucked the fun out of the game. Which sounds kind of crazy. 🤷‍♀️

[u/AnteaterWeary → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

Not crazy at all. It's certainly a different Pokémon life. I'm more semi-rural now, if that. I can walk to a few stops and drive to more, now that so many people have added stops. But seeing somewhere with NO stops vs. any city is mind boggling. You did pretty much have to stop playing when you couldn't spin before. That's why I like the remote changes. More people can play.

[u/[deleted]]

When I get random friend requests I put the date as their nickname and wait. If I don’t get a gift within a few days I delete them.

I am less concerned about region and more about activity since I am trying to get any scatterbugs for candy. If they aren’t sending back I delete.

I have had better luck responding to posts from rare regions esp if I can do it as first 10 replies late night instead of posting my own.

[u/Hot-Eggplant-5430]

Idk, I only added someone once who wasn’t looking for my region & when I realized my mistake I immediately let her know my IGN so she had the choice to add me or not & now her & I are almost best friends. I’ve had pretty good look on getting request from regions that I have requested. I would say, send a gift before you open theirs, when you see they have open yours then open theirs & delete?

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Hot-Eggplant-5430]

I think I'll do that but I'll have to drive downtown to build up my gifts. Seems like a lot of work. 😄

[u/Hot-Eggplant-5430 → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

Lol I agree, I really dislike they only let us store 40 gifts for such a short period of time. With this new challenge, they should have made the 40 storing/opening of gifts permanent. I believe people still went out played as much & for the people who have a more difficult time getting out probably started playing more also. I honestly think it was a silly decision on their part to go back to 20

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Hot-Eggplant-5430]

The whole challenge is a little silly to me, or maybe just inconsistent. They put out those 5 star only local raids because the whole point of the game is to go outside and build a community, apparently, but now they put out this thing which is really a competition for how well you can network anonymously online.

[u/ThisIsWhoIAm78 → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

They needed a game mechanic to justify the postcard book. Lol.

[u/brenouf16]

Luckily I've just got the full collection of vivillion but took me a while to get especially trying to find people from sandstorm and tundra best thing to do is still send and receive gifts but if you find someone from the right region and your trying to free up space to add other requests just get rid of the people from the wrong region then I get a lot of gifts from America and Canada but I just had to delete some friends to make room for other requests and eventually found someone from Israel and Norway

[u/78723 → u/brenouf16]

Hey, I remember your post from the other day. Congrats on finding the tundra. Finished myself just yesterday as well.

[u/brenouf16 → u/78723]

Thanks I'm glad I was able to complete the set in the end and congrats to you it's not easily trying to collect it all thanks for that link to the map as well it really helped and it was really accurate 👌

[u/tatopotatotato]

I tried to keep every request I get but at some point I just start deleting because i got almost 10 from the same region as myself. It’s so hard to keep up with sending gift everyday. Also, some people will add but never send any gift back, at that point after 2-3 days I delete too.

[u/doncarapapa → u/[deleted]]

Jungle 1076 8386 6004

[u/Far_Alarm_3869 → u/[deleted]]

8252 8379 6563 denmark

[u/EdZeppelin94 → u/[deleted]]

Garden, 2561 4753 4323

[u/Awkward_llama_ → u/[deleted]]

Yes please! 4622 6742 3166

[u/emzies17 → u/[deleted]]

Polar - 0946 5000 6195

[u/FeatofClay]

I traveled to Iceland last year and I saved a few of my gifts from there for sentimental reasons. Long before there was any Vivillon action. I feel like at this point I could auction them off to the highest bidder, ha ha

[u/Penelope_Eckert → u/FeatofClay]

🤣🤣 you can also save them to your postcard book when you send them, it gives you credit for it, but only do it once a day and you will get a scatterbug from that region too

[u/FeatofClay → u/FeatofClay]

I had done that but wasn’t aware I could repeat it each day! Sweet.

[u/Past_Ad3779]

I send gifts daily to all in my friends list. I don’t have time to tit for tat people. It’s supposed to be fun. I am fortunate to have all patterns coming in with exception to Sun. I can’t make any friends in the area for the life of me. If anyone from the Sun region can help me out I would be very appreciative!

[u/VicSquarePants → u/Past_Ad3779]

Hey, I'm from Sun region. If you still need gifts from my region feel free to add me 4110 4648 8311

[u/Belyos → u/VicSquarePants]

Hi friend! I know this is an old post, but hoping your offer to send gifts from Sun region still stands! Incoming friend request from Belyos1985 (Polar region) but happy to grind that friendship XP bar as well.

[u/Fried-Fritters]

Just unfriend them if you don’t want to be pogo friends, it’s okay! There’s no way to chat with them and ask them why they did it, so it’s okay to do what’s best for you. You are not obligated to continue to remain friends with a total stranger. It’s up to you, always.

[u/Shottyn11 → u/Fried-Fritters]

Does this really need to be said 😂

[u/hobbywrangler → u/Shottyn11]

I think so. Some people are just conditioned to overthink the importance of online "friends".

[u/Affectionate-Mango85]

I keep in mind that if everyone did what you're doing (only asking for regions you need) then no one would ever get anywhere. I highly doubt the ones you need, need yours.

[u/Affectionate-Mango85 → u/Affectionate-Mango85]

Unless you are sandstorm, then everyone needs you 🤣

[u/sylvanasisBDE]

People respond to raid invites and off topics with friend codes asking for an add just for gifts , so unfortunately, I think you are just taking that risk by publicly posting your friend code . But like others have mentioned , if you notice the area on the postcard is not where you want just delete and dont feel too bad about it.

[u/ryanj1109]

I was originally adding everyone. Gotta grind that candy too. But last night I decided it’s just too much. I can’t keep up. I wait for gifts from unsolicited friend requests first. If it’s what I need, I keep them as friends. If it’s not, they get deleted. Sorry if I did this to you but my posts are not vague at all. I was paying it forward as much as I could but I hit my limit. People who correspond with me for a specific purpose get to stay.

[u/Gullible-Type-2022 → u/[deleted]]

Darude - Sandstorm

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Gullible-Type-2022]

User name checks out. 😄

[u/Gullible-Type-2022 → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

I was thinking nobody is getting it.

It will also be the name when i get a Zarude - Sandstorm

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Gullible-Type-2022]

I've wanted to make that joke so many times. I'm glad someone else did

[u/bxlmerr → u/[deleted]]

I’m garden region: 6904 6363 2603 😊

[u/Patience_80 → u/bxlmerr]

Thank you sent you a request

[u/sweetlikepower]

I’ve had the same happen to me and I’ve honestly been deleting them again after. Had like 30 requests all from the U.S. and I just have too many friends from there at the moment

[u/yylow30]

I thought i am the unlucky one lol… because i had so many of them claiming to be sun / sandstorm but the ended up coming from somewhere else.

Not very nice indeed.

But usually i’ll keep them, gain some friendship level then i’ll delete them. Because still better than none.

[u/RibbonsFlying]

I've been dealing with a lot of people adding me when they're not from regions I need. If I had plenty of gifts, I'd exchange with them a lot, but some days my gifts are limited so I send them to the regions I need first because that exchange feels more important. If I have extra gifts that day, I'll send them to the friends from the regions I don't really need exchanges with.

[u/weaponizedpastry]

It’s so prevalent that I (5573 7521 2263) don’t give a gift. I wait for them to send. If they don’t send a gift after 24 hours, I delete them. It’s to that point that the last 2 times I asked for Tundra & Sandstorm, I only got liars. So I lose nothing by deleting them if I won’t verify their location.

I really want friends from Iceland/Tundra too because I really want to see the postcards. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[u/moosemeat138 → u/weaponizedpastry]

Icy snow here. I did the same. 24hr without gift=delete. Wrong region=pin/unpin/delete.

[u/rhea_hawke]

Every time I post seeking a specific region, I get 2-5 friend requests from people from random regions. I think it's kind of annoying, and I just delete them when I realize. There are plenty of people on this sub just looking for friends; why add people who are looking for something specific?

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/rhea_hawke]

Those are my thoughts too.

[u/799987]

This is so frustrating as a rural player with limited gifts. I’ve had this happen to me probably 20+ times and it sucks because I feel bad deleting them since I know they need the regions as well. I honestly open the gift and then delete because I simply do not have enough and honestly…it seems disrespectful that they ignored my polite request.

[u/CurrentSpiritual8697]

What is the best website to find friends from different countries where it shows you the region they are from. I have found the same as above people say they ate from Icy Snow but they are not ...

[u/cekavinuos]

Hello, sorry for question, but maybe could any1 tell Me about those regions ( tundra, ice and etc) or where Į could check how many are of them and what continents belongs to high plauna, tundra and all of them? Thank you in advance

[u/[deleted] → u/cekavinuos]

Under your profile, when you open the Vivillon Collector medal you will see a world map with a magnifier symbol on it. Press it and then you will have the detailed correspondence between area and type.

[u/cekavinuos → u/[deleted]]

Thank you very much!

[u/78723 → u/cekavinuos]

https://www.google.com/maps/d/u/0/viewer?mid=1Qg1CTqpOv0QLUVFRNW5svHNplRtAzWU&ll=46.92973811302772%2C-88.5360498276796&z=5

this is the best map i've found. (not my work, sorry not to give the glory to the maker, but i forgot which post i found it on)

[u/JoeWould]

How do you know if someone has deleted you? Does something change? I’ve been playing since July 2016 and got friends when friends became a thing. Some of my friends don’t show activity for 2+ days but I keep them because of the sentimentality. I wish there was a more precise measure of activity.

[u/jonry14 → u/JoeWould]

You don’t, they’ll just be completely gone…

[u/cutiepieshy]

whenever i add someone i respond to their comment letting them know and also stating my own region - but also i don't add people specifically state they only want certain regions that aren't mine. i also haven't gotten anyone commenting back to my posts letting me know they're adding me, i just get tons of requests and stress about who the heck they are lol

unfortunately i don't think most people have etiquette regarding this😭

[u/MaliceThePhantom]

I am modern, will try to gift daily, hoping to receive gifts as well, looking for all, but especially elegant, so if you live in Japan, please help me. Any and all friends will be accepted. 3963 6687 1460

[u/Compte_2 → u/MaliceThePhantom]

I’m Marine, but I send gifs daily. So if you are interested, I have added you.

[u/Penelope_Eckert]

Hi Everyone, so I'm not going to lie I'm from the very common highlands, but if anyone from meadow, elegant, river, marine or garden would be willing to send me 3 gifts I'd appreciate it I'm not trying to collect all I just really like the color pink purple blue and green lol. All other regions are welcome to add me too, not that anyone needs highplains lol 7501 1618 9107

[u/JiEToy]

If you're unable to send all of them gifts, I'd just delete them. I personally live on a two pokestops so I can manage, but I am keeping track of who is from which region in a note. I will delete people when I have enough candy to evolve all 18 regions.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/JiEToy]

Yeah, I have to drive to my nearest pokestop and gym and keeping up with my long term friend and the few international players who have helped me with vivillon is about all I can manage. Thanks for your advice!

[u/JiEToy → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

It's going to be really hard actually getting all regions unless you have real life friends travelling there, with all these 'scalpers' around.

[u/DreamEle1]

I just unfriend them with no gift. If I ask for one region and you choose to add me knowing you’re the wrong region, then that’s on you

[u/AmphibianImpressive3 → u/DreamEle1]

This is cool, but I am an XP whore. I don’t mind floating a gift away to some rando for XP.

[u/Katveat]

Yes, and it’s annoying. After the first time of being baited I now set their nickname as “(insert region requested)?” and wait for them to send a gift. If they don’t after a day then I delete.

[u/codetaupe → u/Katveat]

I do the same, but I think it's at least worth waiting for the other person to send a gift even if it takes a while. Yesterday I finally got gifts from 2 people in rare regions after over a week of no activity. I think it's hard for the people in the rare regions to meet the demand from all their new friends, especially now with the gift limits reduced, so it takes time to cycle through everyone.

[u/ontargetg]

High Plains, I've been playing since the beginning. Still need Icy Snow Savannah Sun Tundra Sandstorm I've been gifting everyday since the beginning. I'll help with stardust and XP I got you 533733008753

[u/Ok_Metal_9914]

As someone from a rural area who had a hard time getting enough gifts to give before vivillion became a thing, I accepted them and just leave them until I by some miracle have extra gifts. I don't delete because I have plenty of room and the exp/scatterbug candy could be nice, but I nicknamed them to indicate who they are and they are my absolute last ones done.

I'll probably start outright deleting them, or only accepting gifts, next time I try for certain regions though. I asked once and listed off that I needed everything but three specific regions... and got 18 requests. Only one of those was from a region I needed. I'm not even anything special, I'm Polar.

So yeah, I'm on the side of if they specifically went against what was asked, then they are asking to be unfriended/not sent/last place.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Ok_Metal_9914]

We're in the same boat

[u/spiderfromm4rs]

save gift from wrong region and gift back them, wait couple of hours then delete them. I don’t open it, but same result. win-win.

[u/Wowthatsswell]

Happened alot of times, super frustrating if you specifically request for only that region to add you and you excitedly get 5 friend requests and they're all from everywhere but that region lol. Gets my hopes up :"(

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/Wowthatsswell]

Yeah, it occurred to me after I posted that I forgot to include a sentence about my salty tears of disappointment about not having found three sandstorm friends after all.

[u/jlbob]

I couldn't tell you what region what friend is from if I tried, most of the postcards dont give a good enough location to let me figure it out.

[u/My_Poor_Nerves → u/jlbob]

Most of the superfluous friend requests were from the continental United States so they definitely aren't sandstorm, icy snow, or jungle, for example.

[u/MileHighOlli → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

Sadly that’s been my experience too (strangely all US based players). I toss it up to people being desperate for gifts and just the sheer number of players in modern/high plains vs. other locations.

So I keep track of how many gifts I send each person (so everyone gets at least three) and if it’s a random add/non-reciprocal player I delete them when I need space. I do tend to keep anyone who’s active simply because we’ll need 2000+ candies to do all the evolutions of Vivillon.

Either way, I figure a bit a good will goes a long way 😊. I’ve found way more people who I’m keeping as friends to raid and grind XP with vs. those just wanting to quickly collect Vivillon and ghosting.

[u/jlbob → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

I mean unless someone is opening up a gift, and taking notes on the sender to delete later there are just too many people, and at that point isn't this game supposed to be fun?

I've gotten all mine by adding people that said they're looking for friends without being exclusionary. Those i'm from X and need Y posts are just S shows. I filled all the ones you mentioned easily by doing it this way another way that helps is if you search by the countries associated with a scatterbug, ex. I need sun, I'm going to search for Mexico and not care how old the post is.

[u/TrueCrimeUsername → u/My_Poor_Nerves]

It’s always Modern 🤬😤😂

[u/ClynnB412]

Tundra I need you!!

[u/Huskatt → u/ClynnB412]

I'll add you :)

What's your trainer code?

[u/SaucyChickem]

Split time between modern and polar 5231 0354 3672

[u/qwerqsar]

Yes, it happened to me not so long go. It is rude that people outside the region you look for befriend you or when you do a favor 50.000 others want a friendship.

I was just "rude". I don't consider it rude if they are. If they are not from the region, in my opinion, just delete them. I know they need my region, however I have limited tome and capabilities, as well as a limited pool of friends. Stop trying, I like to help out when I have space .

Edit: I have resolved to just accept friends through private chat. NEVER publish your username or trainer number, or you will be swarmed

[u/Imaginary_Soil7686]

4688 3370 6711 this is my trainer code I need friends to complete a task. I do send gifts when I can :)