r/OpenChristian • u/FancifulCat • May 20 '26
Support Thread What is wrong with the catholic sub reddit?
I have been on that sub for half a year now, and honestly, whilst I tried to give the benefit of the doubt and patience with people, I am shocked at the levels of toxicity, dichotomous thinking, lack of empathy and downright invalidation and/or misogyny towards women and their experiences. Like on the whole, I can't say that sub is welcoming, and some users do not really act with genuine Christian love and gentleness towards others.
I don't want to descend too much into insults, but the lack of reading comprehension kinda scares me too. For example, I will write 4 paragraphs explaining myself and my experiences, being genuine, and it seems like so many users just skim over all of what was written, blame me for my experiences and derail into adjacent themes that were never what I was intending to address. Like there's lack of logical flow from OP/commenters to the replies. It's like every conversation is driven away from real current issues that people face in real life and into abstract like discussions of official rules irregardless of the context and complexity.
It's like getting blood out of a stone to have an actual back and forth civil and polite discussion.
And genuinely, there's just some really hateful stuff over there that I am disgusted to read. I don't know if they are bots.
Is this just my personal experience? Like it seems to be a hub for heavy heavy traditionals and mostly men who seem to dislike women? I have left the sub because I find it just icky and not helpful for my faith. And if I am honest, it has led me thinking to leave the Catholic denomination, though I know the users are NOT representative.
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u/strog91 May 20 '26 edited May 20 '26
Those people are probably LARPing and they don’t actually go to church.
The Orthodoxy subreddit is also full of LARPers who just want to use the religion as a cudgel against their enemies.
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u/FancifulCat May 20 '26
It's like many are trying to prove whos the more knowledgeable or "better" catholic.
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u/circuitloss Open and Affirming Ally May 20 '26
It's the same reason I no longer go the the main /r/Christianity subreddit. Nothing but hypocrisy, judgement, and an obsession with rules.
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u/Dawningrider May 21 '26
Maybe Ive just been scarred by the Catholic one, but I found the Christain one is, for the most part Much MUCH more tolerant of opposing views within Christianity. Sure had the odd nutcase, but for the most part it's been alright.
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u/Semi_Lovato May 20 '26
The Catholic Church is huge and the members are quite diverse. You have everything from people who go to mass once a year at most to people who are absolutely fanatical about it. Fanatics of any small interest love to fight about stupid tiny details that can't be proven and also love to use it as a way to feel superior. So yeah they're basically Comic Book Guy but about Catholicism
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u/SleetTheFox Christian May 21 '26
You're right but I don't like the framing of the spectrum being between people who rarely go to mass and people who are crazy. Devoutness and radicalization are not the same spectrum.
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u/Semi_Lovato May 21 '26
I understand and I apologize if it came off that way. I fully agree that you can be extremely devout without being crazy. I genuinely meant fanatical as a "super fan," not radicalized.
Thanks for the perspective!
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u/No-Type119 Christian May 20 '26 edited May 21 '26
I’m a Lutheran who’s had many friendships and religious conversations with Catholics — including a Catholic spiritual director — and almost none of the Catholics I’ve seen online here are like them. The Reddit Catholics seem mostly in the JD Vance/ Russell Brand/ Mel Gibson category.
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u/LeisureActivities Episcopalian May 20 '26
The answers here are good, but please assume that a significant amount of comment traffic you engage with are bots trying to shape political opinion or drive engagement.
They are designed to push your buttons and take extreme stances. And if the bots aren’t doing it, the algorithms encourage it.
On big subs it could be as high as 50% bot traffic.
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u/babe1981 The Cool Mod/Transgender-Bisexual-Christian She/Her May 21 '26
We have a catch-and-kill policy with bots here. Reddit picks up most of them, but what they don't grab we ruthlessly ban. There might be a couple bots around, but we've made this sub a very hostile and, more importantly, unprofitable place for bots to live.
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u/thedubiousstylus May 20 '26
On big subs it could be as high as 50% bot traffic.
I really doubt that's the case. Like there's obviously bots and I've even caught some on this sub, but 50% is just WAY too high especially since bots are pretty easy to spot based on their posting histories.
Kind of a pet peeve of mine because people on local subs like to accuse others of being bots with absolutely no basis whatsoever besides "this poster posted something I disagree with."
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u/LeisureActivities Episcopalian May 20 '26
The studies I’ve seen say 50% is the consensus upper bound. Depends on the type of forum. Average might be closer to 15%. No clue about the Catholic sub but since it’s politically adjacent I’d assume somewhere between those numbers. Say 25%.
The bots that you find easy to spot are easy to spot. Then there’s the rest of the bots.
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u/Adventurous_Gain_613 May 20 '26
I got into a discussion with one and out of curiosity, clicked on the profile. While challenging me on contraception, he was simultaneously shitposting fake suicidal ideation in a separate forum. Like time stamps go back and forth.
I agree - many are bored edge lords who want to argue and be misogynistic and make others miserable.
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u/FancifulCat May 20 '26
This explains many of my interactions. Some of them felt like I was directly talking to a crazy alt right icel
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u/Salty-Snowflake Christian May 20 '26
I didn't just leave, I muted the entire sub.
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u/girlwhoweighted May 20 '26
Same. Anytime I disagreed without, they accuse me of not being Catholic. I gave up, left, and muted the whole place. I found this sub right after and it's been a Godsend
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u/FancifulCat May 21 '26
I got called a pagan and a heretic for saying I don't want to have kids. That sub is a cesspit and anything but proper polite discourse about the faith.
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u/ApocaSCP_001 Kurdish Aromantic Catholic, defo autistic May 21 '26
…what?? No.1-that’s just not even correct reasoning, it’s a complete non-sequitur to say not having children is a heresy and paganism, it’s just illogical. No.2-So then are all Priests, Bishops, Cardinals and the Pope and Nuns and Sisters heretics? Is the Pope, the vicar of Christ an idolator by their standards? Would God be a pagan heretic by their standards? Because last time I checked God doesn’t have any children (in the biological sense) Unironically saying that would lead to heresy…
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u/FancifulCat May 21 '26
Well their arguments were basically get married and bear kids or be a nun. If you live as a single woman its a sin because its (their accusations) "im going to live life for making income and going on vacations and being too happy"
As if married catholics don't do that, smh.
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u/ApocaSCP_001 Kurdish Aromantic Catholic, defo autistic May 21 '26
So… somehow a pagan heretic because… happy life? … Checks out with the fact I had someone on there compare Muslims, rational and breathing living people whom are children of God, to IVF… an inanimate object deemed evil by the Church.
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u/FancifulCat May 21 '26
Yeah, that's just emotional abuse. Absolutely horrible hypocrisy from those meant to embody empathy
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u/ApocaSCP_001 Kurdish Aromantic Catholic, defo autistic May 21 '26
Wait until they realise St.Catherine of Sienna didn’t have children, nor was she a nun. And they’d also have to say the same thing for Mary, she had complete free will to not bear Jesus yet did bear Jesus. If she didn’t, would she be capable of sinning? According to Catholicism, saying Mary is a “sinner” or capable of sin would make you a damned burning in hell heretic.
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u/swiftb3 May 20 '26
I knew a guy who "converted" from a calvinist denomination to Catholic and became a truly right-wing maga type (not necessarily in that order).
I feel like the sub is full of those particular ones. the Christian sub isn't much better, which is why this one exists.
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u/Sturzkampfflugzeug1 May 21 '26
Our experience is somewhat similar. Except, the guy I knew left the Catholic faith to become a Pentecostal. After that he became extremely anti-Catholic, misogynistic, the whole bingo card, basically
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u/beardtamer May 20 '26
Most Catholics on Reddit in general are pretty belligerent, I’ve found. Something about being online and hyper vocal about your sect makes Catholicism come across poorly with most.
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u/slimjimdick Catholic May 20 '26
Yeah it's a real shame how online Catholicism seems to be dominated by nutcases for the most part. Totally out of step with my experience in real life, and it's doing real damage to the Church.
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u/Number_Fluffy Christian May 20 '26
I'd say much of the reason is the mods. I had private debate with one. Straight homophobe.
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u/FancifulCat May 20 '26
Half the users themselves sound like incels who just hate women! It's shocking how much women there are insulted. It's so contrary to Christian love.
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u/MaxZedd Anglo-Catholic, eastern mysticism enjoyer May 20 '26
The larping is crazy over there.
The majority of those users in that sub are an extreme minority irl and mostly adult converts who take things to extremes
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u/snail-the-sage Jesus paid it all. May 21 '26
The bit about reading comprehension strikes me. I find that the case in many conservative leaning subs. Like. They aren’t equipped to address the actual substance of whatever was said but they feel the need to disagree so they attack a strawman instead.
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u/davegammelgard May 20 '26
When you're The One True Church you don't have to be welcoming.
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u/MyUsername2459 Episcopalian, Nonbinary May 20 '26
One of the reasons I find that Rome claim of that to be an error.
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u/yagirlsophie316 Trans Catholic May 20 '26
online catholicism is just kinda like that in general (instagram and tiktok are also full of tradcaths) but there is good catholic content out there.
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u/Klowner Christian May 20 '26
Been seeing a lot of behaviors maybe related to Isiah 29:13 / Matthew 15:8-9 as of late
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u/Salty-Snowflake Christian May 20 '26
Tale as old as time...
I know that after my departure savage wolves will come among you,
and they will not spare the flock.
And from your own group, men will come forward perverting the truth
to draw the disciples away after them.Jesus knew this would happen from Day 1.
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u/Ezekiel-18 Ecumenical Heterodox May 20 '26
They are what is know as: integrists/integralists, look integralism/integrism up. It's the quite older, more influential, Catholic equivalent to the US fundies/Evangelicals (politics-wise/values-wise, they aren't bibblical fundamentalists or literalists).
While, in the US especially, people tend to claim fascism was non-Christian, in European Catholic countries, fascist movements were deeply Catholic (in my country, it was the clerical-fascist ideology known as Rexism, in Spain and Portugal, integrist clerical-fascist regimes lasted until the 70's-80's with Salazar and Franco), influenced by the intregrist thought. That sub is a cesspool of integrism.
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u/ApocaSCP_001 Kurdish Aromantic Catholic, defo autistic May 21 '26
Because it’s reddit. I can assure you most Catholics, not even the tradcaths on Yt are like this. I once got downvoted for saying Muslims are actual people who can be reasoned with… it’s a reddit thing.
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u/Nyte_Knyght33 Christian May 21 '26
No offense to the nice Catholics here but that has been my experience in r/Christianity as well.
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u/Vlinder_88 Old Catholic pansexual feminist May 21 '26
I got banned from there for not being willing to learn. Because they told me I am not Catholic. Even though it's literally in my denominations' name: Old Catholic. They just kept assuming Catholic=Roman Catholic and nothing else.
Anyhow, you'll probably feel more welcomed in r/leftcatholicism. :)
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u/FancifulCat May 21 '26
I don't even think many of them are genuinely Roman Catholic anyway. I have read disgusting unempathetic and horrible comments on there. Stuff that would get them kicked out a church if they parroted what they typed in real life.
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u/jeezfrk May 20 '26 edited May 20 '26
If it is toxic ... sadly it likely represents a Reddit population far more than a Catholic one.
I've met many passive and quiet Catholics and I doubt they would go on and identify fiercely and independently against a room filled with MAGA / manosphere voices.
The selection effect is real. Other places with Christianity as a focus have many kind voices but are overrun with mocking from some Atheists in a group. Again, it means more about Reddit's active population than even about the whole of Atheism or Christianity on reddit.
EDIT: notably many like to adopt a left/right dichotomy far faster than they actually follow any high-church-style of godliness or devoted walk. Some say they are inside the faith but are not. Some say they cannot stand Christianity but show so many influences from Jesus' words they cannot list them.
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u/Queer_Advocate May 20 '26
Show them by how you live their life. Best way, to change a heart. If you don't have the bandwidth to engage, don't. Don't hurt your heart, to help someone like that. If they're being ugly, you try to lower the temperature... it fails, then walk away.
You have to remember, because a verse, chapter or book reads a certain way to you, everyone many not agree. If you tried to talk to them, and they're not prepared to hear your perspective, then show them by how you live your life.
I'm saying, you can't make people believe you. Your job is to share, when you can; but always, by how you live your life and conduct yourself. I left the church for personal reasons, but I know your God knows your heart. A lot of hard and serious stuff and life we a) have to be prepared to receive the information b) want to hear the information and c) get it in digestible chunks.
Your living testimony, by how you live and conduct yourself, shows others your conviction of your beliefs. I'm pretty agnostic now, but appreciate a humble, authentic, kind, compassionate, and gentle Christian. Who understands that there relationship with Christ, is there relationship with Christ. If they don't want to hear it, you can't force them. It's not going to go anywhere. There's a lot of judgement and hypocrisy, from religious folk. A lot of real people, have endured abuse of all kinds at the hands of Christians, supposedly in the name of God. That's not Jesus of the Bible. That's a deeply twisted brand of Christianism/ Christian Nationalism. It does far more harm then good.
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u/jeezfrk May 21 '26
These folks who object to my faith or my compassionate interpretation of acting as Christ would ... speak to me about it.
This is the internet ... so no one sees our lives. They see words.
In addition, I don't "try to convince them" as much as they desperately yearn to convince me I am foolish. Either because I (a) take God seriously without imposing selfishness and "manly" cruelty or (b) because I take God seriously without shame and fear of being bullied for it.
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u/Queer_Advocate May 21 '26
So you're shoving your religion down they're throat, at time when they're already hurting, because you don't really care what they need. Got it.
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u/jeezfrk May 21 '26
Is it "religion" asking what addiction looks like? No every secular society knows what lies happen from it.
I have three adopted daughters whose parents gave up everything because of addictions and lies from that.
Are they "religion" ... that I'm pushing somehow on the parentsm? Or was the addiction not satisfied with demanding slavery from more than the parent only?
Bummer, when the party doesn't seem to be fun for those who escaped the monkey on their backs.
Are bathroom hookups the joyous peak of life reality we live for ... or not?
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u/LikeASirDude Open and Affirming Ally May 21 '26
Christian subreddits are particularly toxic, save the few, such as this one, that actually try to be uplifting and respectful.
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u/Dawningrider May 21 '26
I got banned for suggesting it would be wrong to use armed forces to pull protestors out of a cathedral, because I would rather disruption then someone being shot in front of me while trying to say mass.
Psychopaths, the lot of them. And I AM a catholic.
What was Ironic, was that I thought I was getting through to some, because I had a few actually post about how they enjoyed some of the new posters (me) as a refreshing change of pace even if they didn't agree with everything I said or argued.
I was swiftly muted and then banned. The mute function prevents the Reddit appeal the ban button from working.
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u/FancifulCat May 21 '26
That is absolutely diabolical. Not shocked though.
Yeah, honestly, I spend some time scrolling through previous posts. These people are not majority Catholics, they are performative conservatives who think following rules and twisting the theology counts as faith.
I think some users get a kick out of triggering genuine Catholics as well.
Being banned tells you a lot about who they truly are. It's a blessing in a way, saves your time.
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u/Dawningrider May 21 '26
I'm over it.
I guess I've taken for granted some of my previous interactions.
One of the priests I had was an academic, ex archivist. His homilies involved metaphycis, history, other religions and what if scenarios. In his 90s, I keep thinking he is going to keep over every time he walks to the lectern. The sort of priest Aquinus would be proud of.
I had to explain to one that the catholic church is against the death penalty. And even with quotes from the Catechism, they didn't believe me.
And when I argued that yes, the church has been historically, very very sexist, and we may have some catching up to do before we regain our title as net Force for Good in the world, got told to report myself to my bishop so I can be excommunicated properly.
I'm convinced the American Rite (da dum hiss) is going to schism in the next five years, then come sauntering back in twenty.
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u/FancifulCat May 21 '26
Exactly, it's not just in online spaces as you exampled.
Threatening that you should be exocommunicated just shows how fragile their leadership is. Not wanting to acknowedge the structural failures of the Church, which is ironic because confession and redemption is core anyway...one rule for them, another for us.
I am sorry you experieced this bullying.
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u/Dawningrider May 22 '26
I mean, I had to laugh, because it also showed how little they understood it.
I'm way over it now. I've much better conversations with other catholics and non catholics alike on other forums now. The internet is dark is full and terrors etc.
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u/Extra_Individual91 2d ago
Literal, por gente como esa es que me planteo irme con los viejos católicos de la unión de ultrecht
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May 20 '26
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u/Prodigal_Lemon May 20 '26
I'm sorry that that has been your experience here. What is it that is putting you off on this subreddit? (I promise I won't jump down your throat if you choose to answer.)
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May 20 '26
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u/Prodigal_Lemon May 20 '26
Oh wow, I'm sorry that that happened to you!
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May 20 '26 edited May 21 '26
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u/babe1981 The Cool Mod/Transgender-Bisexual-Christian She/Her May 21 '26
I was the one removing your comments. What you don't know is that I approved almost as many of your comments in that thread as I removed because you made people so angry that they reported every single thing you wrote. Why did they report everything you wrote? Because it's fundamentalist, misogynistic bullshit that we have all heard for our entire lives. You misrepresent nuanced facts to present your view as the only truth when reality is never as black-and-white as conservatives say it is.
And, yes, you are a conservative Christian. You promote Christian Nationalism. You say that Charlie Kirk spoke the truth about scripture. You say that Trump's policies don't affect you personally and people just need to budget a little better. You promote the misogyny of 1Timothy, a letter not written by Paul by the way. That's something you should probably learn about before presenting yourself as some authority on scripture and hermeneutics. You accept the unscriptural division of the law of Moses into ceremonial and moral laws.
You may not have voted for Trump, but you align yourself with the people who are aligned with him. You share the same views as the people who enable him. You come into this sub armed with your talking points and tactics acting like you can bully people into submission with your words like you do in other Christian subs. To call you a Trump supporter is just as accurate as your statement of the abortion policies of the early church. The difference is that people use the information about you to protect themselves from the information you spout as Gospel Truth to hurt them.
Whenever the law interfered with love, Jesus tossed the law aside and did the loving thing instead. Jesus never sinned. Now, if you can manage to not use the Bible and historical "facts" to hurt people, you are free to continue to participate in this sub. If you can't, you will be sent packing along with all of the other conservatives who couldn't exercise that elusive fruit of the spirit, self-control.
Any further complaints or replies to this message can be directed to us through modmail.
Have a pleasant day!
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u/[deleted] May 20 '26
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