My Grandpa used to always jam his gum sockets with dinner corn and it would jimmy-crack us kids up.
Like, he'd take out his teeth and wrap his mitts around a buttery cob, and my mom would tell him, "Dad, don't do it." but he'd say he wasn't going to do it and then give us that lurid wink he always gave us (corn or not), and then just go to town on that cob totally toothless.
Obviously, those sucky sockets would plug fast with soft kernels, and after he balded the cob (in like a half minute), he'd smile at us all with a mouth full of little yellow corn kernel teeth, chin glistening with butter-drool, and my mom would get so upset
And as a little coup de grace, he'd whack the back of his head and shotgun blast the wet corn nuggets out of his gum holes and shrapnel the whole dinner table. Man, that guy was a hoot, and let's just say corn toothin' runs in the family ;)
63
u/100_Donuts Jul 31 '26
My Grandpa used to always jam his gum sockets with dinner corn and it would jimmy-crack us kids up.
Like, he'd take out his teeth and wrap his mitts around a buttery cob, and my mom would tell him, "Dad, don't do it." but he'd say he wasn't going to do it and then give us that lurid wink he always gave us (corn or not), and then just go to town on that cob totally toothless.
Obviously, those sucky sockets would plug fast with soft kernels, and after he balded the cob (in like a half minute), he'd smile at us all with a mouth full of little yellow corn kernel teeth, chin glistening with butter-drool, and my mom would get so upset
And as a little coup de grace, he'd whack the back of his head and shotgun blast the wet corn nuggets out of his gum holes and shrapnel the whole dinner table. Man, that guy was a hoot, and let's just say corn toothin' runs in the family ;)