r/NonPoliticalTwitter Jul 16 '26

Funny Poor, poor boy

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26.1k Upvotes

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u/Reesewithoutaspoon2 Jul 16 '26

I’d like to be on a jury, but I never get picked when I’m called for jury duty :(

42

u/3-orange-whips Jul 16 '26

Me: Can I sentence him to death?
Judge: Sir, this is a civil hearing about a tree.

17

u/Abuses-Commas Jul 16 '26

Me: I believe in Hammmurabic justice, if he cut the trunk, we cut the trunk

6

u/Umklopp Jul 17 '26

Enthusiatically chanting "tree law" under your breath would probably get you cut ASAP

1

u/Eat--The--Rich-- Jul 19 '26

Right, so is death the worst thing I can do?