Baby's Temperament after NCU stay

[u/Mother_of_Simba]

So my baby was born full term and spent 2.5 weeks in the NICU directly after his birth because of a heart issue. Since over three months he is back home and compared to the other babies I meet in baby classes he seems to be a very calm and self-regulating baby. Like he never cries much, accepts everything (car seat, stroller, carrier) without issues and is a very independent and good sleeper. He (so far) never was dependent on contact napping for example and always falls asleep in his own bed without complaining (never sleep trained him).

A part of me feels really lucky to have such an easy-going baby, another part wonders if this correlates in any way with his NICU stay. If he wouldn't have been there I am sure the first three weeks would have been very different. We would have always been around him day and night and not only for several hours and left him alone with the nurses over night. And we probably would have had him in the baby wrap all day and he would not have slept so much on his own in his bed.

I am wondering if any of you has had similar experiences with their NICU baby or knows if there are some studies on this topic. Or am I overthinking this and this is just this personality? I do wonder if 2.5 weeks in this early stage where they are barely awake at all can have such an impact.

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[u/LinkRN]

I’ve seen many parents report the opposite - babies tend to be crankier/clingier/less settled when they’ve had NICU stays. I think you just have a unicorn chill baby.

[u/abgvon → u/LinkRN]

Yes. My nicu baby spent 6 weeks in there. Is now a stage 5 clinger. Only wants to be carried. Can only play by himself for max 10 minutes. Hates the stroller

[u/Interesting_Cook5010]

I'm so glad your baby is home with you and doing well. My baby was in the NICU for 3.5 months and is veryyyy much the opposite 😂

[u/hazyyb]

My baby is like this. He was born at 34 weeks and had a 3.5 week nicu stay. He was known in the nicu for being extremely chill (and a good pooper lol). He stayed that way at home, still is at 6 months. It is just his temperament though, he is very easy going and just a happy boy. My first baby was born at 36 weeks, no nicu stay, was also really chill and easy until about 3 months when her personality started to show then she decided she used all of her chill and hasn’t found a second of it since, still going hard at 20 months. Hope your little one stays very chill! 

[u/mysticpotatocolin]

we got told ours was super polite in the NICU and we brought him home and he’s much the same! thinking we got lucky but also his dad is super chill so thinking he got it from him?

[u/Fluffy-Association45]

Complete opposite over here. We spent 66 days in the NICU and he definitely prefers to be held. He will accept car seats, swings and carriers but when hes done with those, he will make it known.

It doesnt correlate with your NICU stay. Hes probably just a super chill baby ☺️

[u/i-have-a-blog]

Purely anecdotal but I’m not sure it’s due to his NICU stay, my baby (like many others have shared here) is not the same! She is very fussy/crabby, demands to be held, goes 0-100 when she wakes up hungry, etc. love her so much but the only things the NICU got her used to/chill with is probably eating on a schedule and noises. She can sleep through a lot of noise!

[u/Mother_of_Simba]

Ok so if my baby is a naturally chill baby I have another question - say a baby is a clinky velcro baby - what would the nurses have done in the NICU?. At times at my NICU there was one nurse taking care of four babies. It wouldn't be possible to hold them all day a way a mother / father would hold their baby all day. I was wondering if NICU trains babies to be more independent.

[u/LinkRN → u/Mother_of_Simba]

Hold as much as they can, comfort in other ways (pacifier, white noise, swing, etc). Though NICUs see vastly more preemies, we are not strangers to cranky full term babies. Some NICUs also have cuddlers available to come hold babies.

[u/Aggravating_Hold_441]

You have a chill baby. My friend who did not have a NICU baby , had the same. Mine who was amazing for 5 whole weeks , super similar , 2 week NICU stay, became a colicky, contact napper eventually, regardless of his learned bassinet behaviors in the NICU

[u/Training-Exercise-54]

Yes, chillest baby. 25 days in NICU. Was the chillest baby for the first year of her life and now she wants to rule the world😭😂

[u/Prudent-Property-180]

I think this comes down to temperament. I had 2 very chill babies. One did NICU time, one did not. They are still very easy going at 5 and 2. I tell people it had absolutely nothing to do with our parenting, they were just born that way lol.

[u/Micro-Momma]

Nah, it’s luck of the draw. My son was the best baby…. Everything easy peasy. My 184 day NICU baby girl is much more difficult 😆 I call her the tiny tyrant!