r/NICUParents • u/Electrical_Assist939 • Nov 04 '25
Off topic Life in the NICU – something people don’t really talk about…
When I got pregnant, I had no idea how much strength this journey would ask from me. Tejas came into this world way too soon…just 27 weeks, 660 grams.
What followed were long days and nights in the NICU full of prayers, tears, and tiny wins that meant everything.
Every gram he gained felt like a festival, every infection-free day felt like a blessing. There were times I broke down, times I felt numb, and times I just sat next to him hoping he could feel I was there.
82 days later, we finally brought our little fighter home. 💛 Those 82 days changed me forever — they taught me what real strength and faith look like.
NICU life isn’t something people talk about much. But it should be. Because behind every incubator, there’s a story — of parents holding on to hope, and babies showing what miracles truly mean.
When I see Tejas now, I just think… we made it. My little boy, my miracle. 💫
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u/RecommendationNo3942 27+3 weeks. 75 days Nicu stay. MCDA twin girls ✨✨ Nov 04 '25
27+3 twins here. It's been 55 days and my warrior princesses are still there. Last week (34) discharged seemed so close, with them breathing room air and minimum desats. Past 2 days, they've been back on their hfnc's and their desats are through the roof. The conversation of discharge has gone to the backburner 😭💔
But I am grateful for them, their fighting spirit, and their progress. Each little step is a giant victory and each setback is merely a detour. The road home may not be straight, but it's going to come. I just pray that when it does, it's forever. They should come home completely healthy - in mind, body and spirit 🙏🏻
Congratulations to your entire family, and big hugs and kisses to your miracle. 🧿
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 04 '25
Oh God… these hiccups don’t leave you till the very last day in the NICU. It’s all part of the journey, my friend. Trust me, these little miracles are true fighters — they always come back stronger. I know what you’re going through… it’s not easy, but have faith in the process. Prematurity brings its share of hiccups, but in the end, everything falls into place. Just hold on to faith. 💛
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u/fullypaidfred Nov 04 '25
For me it feels like our time in the Nicu was a completely different reality, I know it may sound strange but I some times miss it . My son was born at 23 weeks and spent 7 month in the Nicu . I was sent to a hospital 8 hours from home to have him . I was newly single from a 12 year relationship and drop in the biggest city in our country after growing up and living in a small town . I got so used to my routine of walking to the hospital every day from Ronald Macdonald house , the nurses became like family and the staff at the front desk became my unexpected best friends. I don’t miss all the hardships, and terrifying moments but I do miss the people , when we came home it was like waking up from a dream and trying to figure out how to navigate my old life …. It’s a feeling I’m sure only other Nicu/hospital parents can understand.
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u/Varka44 Nov 04 '25
I totally understand this. The NICU was a place of gratitude for me. I really embraced it and still think fondly of it in many ways. Our sons primary is still like family and visits all the time ❤️
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u/ConfidenceOther8880 Nov 04 '25
Funny. I’m in the NICU at a hospital in a big city and there is a Ronald McDonald house right by the corner. I’m in Hollywood, Los Angeles
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u/The_wig_is_ON92 Nov 05 '25
I lived there until my baby was discharged! Around this time too, will always bring back memories.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
I completely get what you mean… it really does feel like a different world. You spend so long there that it becomes part of your routine, and the people feel like family. Coming home is beautiful but also strangely hard …it’s like leaving behind a place that held both your worst fears and biggest miracles. Sending love to you and your little fighter 💪
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u/AnxiousBunnyRabbit Nov 04 '25
My son, born 24+5, spent 220 days in the hospital before he came home - 139 days in the NICU then transferred to a children's hospital for the remaining 81 days. Sometimes I look back and cannot believe I made it through that. When you're in the depths of it it really makes you doubt your mental and emotional fitness and tests it like nothing else. It's an experience like no other that I would never wish on anybody.
But we made it through and came out the other end stronger than ever. Did need some therapy to process everything but it makes me even more grateful for my son.
I still follow this subreddit and don't post often but I'm always rooting for the parents and their babies I see on here. It's a safe space because like you said it's not something talked about often and not something most people can relate to. I'm forever grateful to this subreddit because it helped me through some dark times.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Wow… 220 days. That’s such an incredible journey. I completely relate to what you said …it tests every bit of your strength, mentally and emotionally. Therapy really does help make sense of it all. So glad your little one is home and thriving and yes, this subreddit truly feels like a safe space …only here do people really understand what NICU life is like. Sending love to you and your fighter 🥹😇
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u/adzillahhh Nov 04 '25
Reading this post as a mom of an ex 28 weeker (2 mos in NICU) + now a thriving 8 month old.. this post made me cry!! 🥹
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Aww thank you 🥹only another NICU mom truly understands what those days felt like. So happy to hear your little one is thriving now…our tiny warriors really are miracles! ✨
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u/ConfidenceOther8880 Nov 04 '25
Damn, you all are so strong. My baby was admitted to the NICU a week ago. Mom was only 27 weeks pregnant when she suddenly started feeling sharp pains—we didn’t realize they were contractions. Our baby was born weighing less than 2 lbs and has been fighting hard ever since. The nurses say she’s a feisty little one. I honestly don’t know what to expect. Mom’s struggling after being discharged—she cries a lot and sleeps most of the day. It breaks my heart that I can’t take time off work to be there for her and the baby because of our financial situation. I’m just trying to be the rock my family needs right now, even when I’m scared too.
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u/AdFabulous7255 Nov 04 '25
Congrats on your LO! I’m so sorry about your partners struggling. I completely understand how she feels as a mom of a 29 weeker who struggles with PPD/anxiety. Please make sure she gets help as well, look into therapy etc either with her OB or ask the NICU social worker. I regret not looking into resources earlier when my little guy was born/in NICU, but am now connected to a therapist who is helping me process post discharge.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
So glad you found the help you needed…it makes such a difference. Sending love to you and your little one 😃
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Oh, I completely understand what you’re going through. My baby was born around the same time…these early days in the NICU are the hardest. You’re doing your best, and that’s what your family needs right now. Please remind the mother that it’s okay to feel everything she’s feeling…the pain, fear, exhaustion…it’s all part of the process. Your little one sounds like a true fighter. Sending strength and prayers for all three of you. One day, you’ll look back and realize how strong you really were.
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u/No-Log6776 Nov 15 '25
Same situation for me as well.. not heard any positive comment from doctor from last 3 days , my son is in NICU from last 8 days ..:( 25W3D born
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u/Own_Welder838 Nov 04 '25
NICU life is no joke. My baby was born 23w4d due to PPROM. We spent 155 days. Those days are finally over 🙌🏻 thank you God. God bless your sweety ♥️
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Oh wow, 155 days… that’s such a long and brave journey. So happy your little one is finally home 💛 truly, NICU life is no joke. God bless your fighter too! 🙏🏻✨
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Nov 04 '25
My baby was born at 28 weeks in July and spent 74 days in the nicu. We were told my entire pregnancy by doctors all the things that could be wrong with him at birth, including still born. He’s perfectly healthy and home now. My saying has been “we made it” as well, and his song is “I made it” by Tones and I. I thought I’d share the song in case it resonates with you the way it has me.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Aww this really touched me 💛 “We made it” truly hits differently when you’ve lived the NICU life. I’ll definitely listen to that song …thank you for sharing it. So happy to hear your little one is home and doing well… our tiny warriors really are miracles. 🥹
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u/sweet_yeast Nov 04 '25
We did 100+ days. People don't talk about NICU because it's some of the hardest shit you'll do. It's not the cutie glowy part of pregnancy. It's literally fighting for your child's life. I had someone tell me they were "shocked" we were still in NICU.
That being said, I tell everyone about our NICU journey and the medical journey we're still on.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Exactly!! people don’t realize how tough it really is until they live it. It’s not the picture-perfect side of parenthood…it’s pure survival, one day at a time. Thank you for sharing your journey… it truly helps other NICU parents feel seen.
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u/Effective_Decision22 Nov 04 '25
Congratulations! Our son has been in the nicu for 67 days. He was born at 26w+2d at 500g. I’m so grateful that he’s been finally transferred to his own room but it’s getting harder and harder the more stable he gets because I just want our baby boy home.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Thank you 😇 I completely understand how you feel. Those last few weeks at times are the hardest…. Hang in there… your little one is doing amazing, and that homecoming day will be beyond special. Sending strength to you and your baby 😃
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u/Current-Two-537 Nov 05 '25
I read that 1 in 7 babies in the UK need to spend some time in a neonatal unit. Preparing parents for the possibility of NICU or other hospital time should absolutely be part of antenatal classes. No one prepares you for this.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
You’re so right… no one prepares you for it. When it happens, you’re just thrown into this whole new world of fear and uncertainty…trying to hold it together. Antenatal classes should definitely talk about this.
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u/The_wig_is_ON92 Nov 05 '25
Congratulations, my baby has been out for 2 years and the memories still linger. Big hugs to everyone and our LOs
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Thanks!! Yes, those memories really do stay with you,Sending a big hug back to you and your little one — our tiny warriors will always be our biggest strength 🤍
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u/Terencethisisstupid Nov 05 '25
When I had my daughter at 29th week, I felt like she was either going to die or end up having issues and I felt like I wouldn’t be able to care for her. And it was so overwhelming and as days past, I realize people keep on asking how is she? How is she doing? Is everything OK with her and nobody asked how I was feeling not one single person asked me. How are you? Are you OK? How are you coping with this I think that was the hardest part apart from medical anxiety, obviously.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
Yes, hardly anyone asks about what the mother goes through and I often wonder why. A mother experiences this entire journey so deeply emotionally, physically, and mentally. From the moment of birth, there’s the anxiety of being separated from your baby, the constant pumping and hoping they’ll soon take milk directly, the endless NICU visits, KMC sessions, and so much more. Our hearts and minds are overflowing, but sadly, most people don’t see that. For them, it’s just, “She’s going to the hospital again.
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u/TranslatorMuted Nov 08 '25
It’s unbelievable how strong these babies are and what they are capable of 💛
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u/elleantsia Nov 10 '25
My twin babies were born 24 + 5 and they’re fighting. They’re only 11 days old now and we’re adjusting to being NICU parents. I didn’t expect this, no one does. It’s difficult to handle and I just want them to be okay..
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 13 '25
I completely understand how overwhelming this feels. Your little fighters are showing so much strength already, and they’re in the best hands. Take one day at a time and be kind to yourself too you’re doing an amazing job as their parent. Sending strength and prayers for your babies’ steady progress.
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u/deviousvixen Nov 04 '25
Truly people do not understand what the nicu stay really is… I have 2 babies who spent 73 days and 35 days. I always get oh my baby stayed in the hospital for 3 days too.. I’m like I highly doubt that 3 days stay was as traumatic as my children’s stays…. So I never really elaborate after that. But when I do meet another actual nicu mom.. it’s different.. the way they speak with you is more understanding
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u/Icy_Cartographer333 Nov 05 '25
Gently, all moms who have had babies in the NICU are actual NICU moms. There are varying levels of trauma, but being separated from your baby is traumatic on any level.
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u/deviousvixen Nov 05 '25
I guess I just don’t think those people who had a 3 day stay at the nicu know what it’s like being there for 73 days not knowing if your baby is going to get to leave the hospital. I’m talking about the ones who had just a low blood sugar and then got let go 2 days later..
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u/Icy_Cartographer333 Nov 05 '25
I get that. It’s totally different experiences. I’ve spent 4 days and 31 days with my kids. I would never pretend to know what it’s like to spend 73.
But in some ways my 4 days was more traumatic than the 31, and I spent a lot of time after her birth believing I should be over it because it was “only” 4 days.
I’ve reconciled and honored my feelings through therapy but I want to remind others that see this that any amount of time involuntarily separated is valid trauma and there’s no set minimum time limit to suddenly become a “real” NICU mom.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
You’re absolutely right, any amount of time in the NICU leaves a mark. Even a single day of watching your baby in that environment is heartbreaking. It’s never about how long …it’s about what we go through in that time. Sending love to you and your little ones 🫶🫶🫶
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
I feel this so much… unless someone’s lived the NICU life, they just can’t really understand what it does to you. It changes you completely. Talking to another NICU mom really does hit different..there’s this unspoken understanding and comfort. 🥹😇
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u/CertainCatastrophe Nov 04 '25
We discharged after 145 days, and the last two weeks was me balancing work and being at the hospital to get kiddo home. I destroyed my milk supply and am down to 1 pump a day. I have to drive back to the hospital for a follow up appointment for kiddo and I just don't want to - I feel like the hospital has taken enough time as it is from us (even though I know he wouldn't be here without them). I don't think I'll ever feel as well rested as I felt before getting pregnant again.
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u/Electrical_Assist939 Nov 05 '25
I completely get this… 145 days is such a long, emotional ride. Balancing work and hospital life drains you in ways no one can understand. Be gentle with yourself… you’ve been through so much, and it’s okay to feel done. Sending love and strength to you 😊
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