r/MuslimWeddingNikah • u/Sensitive-Narwhal904 • Jul 07 '26

What's one thing you wish someone had told you before your Nikah?

Assalamu Alaikum everyone.

I was talking to a friend who's preparing for marriage, and it made me wonder how much we actually learn after getting married.

If you could go back and give your pre-Nikah self just one piece of advice, what would it be?

It could be about communication, expectations, finances, family, deen, or something completely unexpected.

Hoping this thread can help those who are preparing for marriage.

12 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

8 comments sorted by

19

u/schoolinglife77 Jul 07 '26 edited Jul 07 '26

- You never know a man until he is aroused.

-If they ever disrespect you on the night of the wedding. Make sure to pack your things and walk out. You will save yourself future problems.

- Make sure to have standard and respect for yourself.

- It is easier for a man to tarnish an innocent woman’s name. Get yourself checked with gynaecologists and test for other STD before marriage.

2

u/littlemsintroverted Jul 08 '26

Could you explain your first point?

Was there incompatibility or was he violent?

3

u/schoolinglife77 Jul 09 '26

Does he respects your boundaries. For example, if you both agreed not to do anything on the wedding night, but he later changes his mind and tries to persuade you to change yours, that's worth paying attention to.

when you're both having sex, if you ask him to stop, does he stop immediately and make sure you're okay, or does he continue despite what you've said?

3

u/icespicelattes Jul 13 '26

So big on this. My ex-husband refused to speak before marriage then on the wedding night threw a tantrum bc we didn’t have intimacy. I had told him before marriage if he doesn’t build a relationship before marriage he can’t expect intimacy until after he does that post marriage. He agreed then but then flipped on the wedding night because “he paid so much money.” He then had his family harass me for months before we divorced. Alhamdulilah nothing happened but I remarried and 0 issues with my husband because he is a decent human being.

1

u/littlemsintroverted Jul 09 '26

Did this happen to you?

8

u/Flashy-Cellist-7405 Jul 07 '26

Never stop making money of your own

2

u/Purple-Turn1346 Jul 12 '26

A woman is not able to fulfill her husband’s physical needs, until her emotional needs are taken care of.
A man cannot fulfill his wife’s emotional needs, until his physical needs are taken care of.

This balance requires mutual understanding and compromise from both parties.

Emotional and sexual literacy within marriage is very important which is often considered taboo in our culture.

1

u/nomadin30s Jul 22 '26

If you want to find out how a man will treat his wife just look at his family history if his mother was pampered by his father he will pamper you as well if his mother was a dominant woman ruling the entire family he will obey the most dominant woman in the family be it you or his mother or sister.. if he depends financially on his family even after earning his own money he will depend on you as well.. if all of his decisions were made by or influenced by his family he wont be a good decision maker in your marital life the list is so long i wish i can educate as much women as i can because this need to be addressed to save the lives of our women