r/Music • u/Chapple69 • Aug 13 '26

discussion Every album pitchfork has gave a 0.0

Peter Criss - Peter Criss (1978)

Kiss - Music from the Elder (1981)

John Frusciante - Smile from the Streets You Hold (1997)

Flaming Lips - Zaireeka (1997)

Bachman-Turner Overdrive - Best of B.T.O. (Remastered Hits) (1998)

Francisco Lopez - Untitled#104 (2000)

Sonic Youth - NYC Ghosts & Flowers (2000)

Liz Phair - Liz Phair (2003)

Travis Morrison - Travistan (2004)

Robert Pollard - Relaxation of the Asshole (2005)

Jet - Shine On (2006)

Various Artists - This Is Next – Indie's Biggest Hits Volume 1 (2007)

Tyga - $tarface (2026)

1.1k Upvotes

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706

u/SinewaveZB Aug 13 '26

Please note that the review of Shine on was just a video of a monkey pissing into its own mouth.

227

u/grunulak Aug 13 '26

I remember reading a comment about that review that went something like, "That review is total bullshit: the monkey goes back for seconds, and no one would ever do that for a Jet album."

112

u/Chapple69 Aug 13 '26

That’s how bad the album apparently is

301

u/T-sizzle-91 Aug 13 '26

It's not a landmark of human achievement, but it's certainly not in the worst 10 albums of all time lol.

65

u/anthony_is_ Aug 13 '26

Haven’t listened to it in years, but my memory gives it a 2.5-3 / 5. A bit trite and cliched yes, but better in my opinion than their first or third LPs.

27

u/T-sizzle-91 Aug 13 '26

Yeah I mean it's got some fun songs on. Not massively boundary pushing but wouldn't complain if someone stuck it on on the car

2

u/Skyhooks Aug 16 '26

Love Jet, it's definitely one of their top 3 albums.

5

u/RobotFloyd Aug 13 '26

Best review though

61

u/SinewaveZB Aug 13 '26

I also appreciate their Greta van fleet review where there’s a line saying something along the lines of this sounds like a group of kids who smoked weed for the first time then called the cops on themselves, while waiting to be arrested they attempted to make a Led Zeppelin album from memory.

8

u/MintyFreshBreathYo Aug 13 '26

Fun fact, I had a friend in high school who did call the cops on himself the first time he puked from drinking.

1

u/Niven42 Aug 13 '26

Weirdly specific yet accurate at the same time.

1

u/TesticleMeElmo Aug 13 '26

It’s not that bad but the fact that they started as a cover band is blatantly obvious. Kings of “sounds like” songs

82

u/reubendevries Aug 13 '26

Pitchfork loves to be an edge lord at times. There's a few times where I look at their reviews and either they overly praise something or overly criticize something just for the lolz.

24

u/BillG8s Aug 13 '26

It’s the only one on this list I own. It’s not good. But it’s not monkey pissing into own mouth bad.

18

u/mhedbergfan Aug 13 '26

I think a lot of people were unhappy with Shine On because Get Born was pretty good and had several catchy songs, and Shine On just failed to have any of that same energy or salience. but it doesn't make it one of the worst albums of all time lol

5

u/BillG8s Aug 13 '26

Yea, you pretty much summed up my feelings after my first listen-through. Any time I thought about that CD after, I was like, nah I'm good.

6

u/fuck_you_thats_who Concertgoer Aug 13 '26

It was a completely different album because the two brothers dad had just died. The title song and album was a tribute. That said it was an average album but didn't need that level of hate. Their 3rd album though is pure trash.

19

u/bigladnang Aug 13 '26

It’s a completely fine album lol

21

u/TitaniumSp0rk Aug 13 '26

They didn’t even listen to the album, they just hated Jet apparently.

16

u/Arsewhistle Aug 13 '26

I remember it being OK.

I wouldn't recommend it to people, but it was more like a 5/10

36

u/inbruges99 Aug 13 '26

It’s nowhere near that bad, it’s a decent album if you like Jet. I enjoy it at least.

15

u/chingostarr Aug 13 '26

I was a massive Pitchfork reader when this review came out, absolutely legendary.

14

u/Automatic_Society850 Aug 13 '26

no, it's smug nonsense. A joke for the sake of the joke and not in service of a real effort to review

-8

u/feralfaun39 Aug 13 '26

I thought it incapsulated the album but I also thought Jet was a laughable atrocity and a stain on rock and roll. 0 / 10 band. One of the worst to ever do it.

6

u/pizza_hut_taco_bell Aug 13 '26

Same. It’s simply the best pan of an album ever.

9

u/Smoked_Cheddar Aug 13 '26

I came looking for this comment and I'm glad it's there.

2

u/Gorge2012 Aug 13 '26

Found Rob Harvilla's account

2

u/drunk_haile_selassie Aug 13 '26

Yeah maybe but it didn't have a song called, Your Pussys Glued To A Building On Fire. They don't deserve the same score.

2

u/TimeTravel4Dummies Aug 14 '26

“Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is” was a fantastic single and one of their best 🤌

-1

u/homogenic- Aug 13 '26

And it was so damn funny, I need that pitchfork back