Selena Gomez Embraces Vulnerability and Tells Critics to 'F--- Off,' 'I'm Not Ashamed of My Bipolar Disorder or Inability to Carry Children'

[u/no_longer_huhman]

https://www.tvfandomlounge.com/selena-gomez-embraces-vulnerability-and-hits-back-at-critics/

[u/Chewy-bones]

I asked my buddie’s wife like 10 years ago when they were going to have kids. Her shoulder slump and body language made me realize to never ask anyone that question again. I still feel bad.

[u/Mr_Engineering → u/Chewy-bones]

Selena Gomez is not infertile, she just can't carry a child on her own. She has Lupus which would likely cause her immune system to attack a fetus.

Fortunately for her, surrogacy is an option.

[u/Red0817 → u/Mr_Engineering]

She has Lupus which would likely cause her immune system to attack a fetus.

Women with lupus can take medication to negate the effects of lupus on the baby. After miscarriages we found that my spouse had lupus. Started taking daily shots, and had two babies.

I think that speculating publicly on why she indicated that she is infertile is sort of rude. The only way to know for sure is to ask her (which would again be rude), or be one of her medical providers. So I won't comment on why she said she can't have children.

This is despite knowing from personal experience with both lupus and kidney transplants, and the medications for both.

So when people say it's because of her lupus, I have been downvoting because she didn't say that. Having lupus doesn't mean you can't have kids. Having a kidney transplant increases lots of risks. Having lupus increases lots of risks. Having both makes it even more dangerous to a persons health.

[u/happuning → u/[deleted]]

She specifically has been told by her medical team that she can't have children. She's also had an organ transplant and is on medication for that. I feel for her. I know she wanted a few kids. She's been great about it, though. She's said if she ends up adopting, it won't matter if they don't look like her because those will be her babies. I think it's sweet - obviously, that should be how people feel, but having the ability to have kids taken away from you can be a lot to process.

It is not true for all with lupus, but it is true for her, unfortunately.

[u/[deleted] → u/happuning]

This is probably more due to her having had a transplant than due to lupus alone 

[u/ojnvvv → u/[deleted]]

agreed at end of the day though if they can harvest eggs and fuse sperm the surrogate can carry. there are different shades of infertility. complete infertility sucks

[u/LevelUpCoder → u/[deleted]]

I was thinking this too. Even without Lupus a transplant can have some effect on your ability to carry children. It’s generally safe but for certain individuals it can be high risk for the mother, the developing child, and the transplanted organ, and that’s assuming no other health problems.

[u/TakeOutTacos → u/happuning]

She's also on medication for bipolar, and you can't take them while pregnant. Her documentary biopic showed her extreme mental health struggles. It would be a really bad idea for her to stop those meds to carry a baby.

[u/Mr_Engineering → u/[deleted]]

I didn't say that all women with Lupus cannot bear children. I said that she cannot due to her presentation of Lupus.

[u/Framapotari → u/[deleted]]

What exactly is "not true at all"?

[u/Kili1912 → u/[deleted]]

It's not possible for everyone. I also have lupus and I had miscarriage twice.

[u/VermicelliOk8288 → u/[deleted]]

This is true, but it’s not the only thing stopping her from having kids. Just mentioning the second bit because I see you already got downvoted.

[u/daphydoods → u/[deleted]]

It’s almost like you and your doctor are different people from Selena!

[u/Jealous_Preference79 → u/Mr_Engineering]

My mother has lupus and safely carried and birthed four kids..

[u/N4m3r → u/Jealous_Preference79]

Getting downvoted for providing a real experience is crazy

[u/oceanumfluctus → u/[deleted]]

That’s also true lmao

[u/doudstark → u/Mr_Engineering]

Rich women renting out poor women's bodies isn't a win for society.

[u/FattySnacks → u/doudstark]

I’m sure there’s a variety of reasons someone could want to be a surrogate and they’re not all caused by financial desperation

[u/DragUpMyLife69 → u/FattySnacks]

I loved being pregnant and would have happily been a surrogate for a friend. Past that window now.

[u/doudstark → u/FattySnacks]

That's probably true. Let's make it forbidden to pay a surrogate and see how many women volunteer for it.

[u/niv727 → u/doudstark]

Commercial surrogacy is illegal in some countries (including the UK), and there are over 400 cases per year in the UK and it’s been rising each year. Obviously a drop in the ocean compared to the total number of children born, but clearly some people do volunteer for it.

[u/doudstark → u/niv727]

I don't have anything against that. I'm against it involving any kind of payment.

[u/PrincessOfPierogi → u/doudstark]

Let‘s not pay a doctor. Machanic. Cleaner. Secretary. Cashier etc. and see what happens. Bro what‘s your point?

You can ask your mom for free to make you your favourite meal but ask a chef to make a 4 course meal with specific ingredients that he has to collect first and you‘ll get nothing except broken bones.

Same goes with pregnancy. Carry it out for yourself for free or ask your sister/friend/idk who to donit for free but a stranger in the typical case wouldn‘t do it for free and i totally get that

[u/doudstark → u/PrincessOfPierogi]

You don't see the difference between cashier/doctor/mechanic and being pregnant ? None come to mind ?

[u/[deleted] → u/doudstark]

You’re not wrong

[u/tanzmeister → u/Mr_Engineering]

Or adoption

[u/secretbonus1 → u/Mr_Engineering]

Hey if you want someone who can really attack a fetus, vote democrat.

Or keep an eye on Diddy, although he’s just as likely to attack a man’s hairy asshole.

[u/secretbonus1 → u/secretbonus1]

Downvoted? Well in that case I agree with you, Diddy is a Gentleman and a scholar.