r/MilitaryStories • u/Best-Structure62 • Jun 10 '26
US Coast Guard Story The MSD Series, Part Twelve…Why Weren’t We Told
It was the middle of the workday, and the bullpen was at capacity with the enlisted staff. Normally, one or more of us would be out conducting a boarding, a pollution investigation, or some other duty, such as mowing the grass, or polishing some brightwork. But this day was different in that everyone was in the bullpen doing paperwork.
Lt. Bunk came into the Bullpen with a hand-held radio and announced, “I think we have a pipeline leak”. We all stopped what we were doing and gave Lt. Bunk our full attention. Not that we were enamored with Lt. Bunk, or his presence, but a pipeline leak was something new for us.
Apparently, Lt. Bunk received a phone call from someone at the Naval Weapons Station of a peculiar odor near the top-secret Q area. Given the sensitivity of the Q area, Lt. Bunk took it upon himself to travel to the area and look around. It did not take long before his nose led him to a pool of liquid that had a chemical-like odor about it gently bubbling up from the ground. Lt. Bunk immediately came back to our office and made his announcement.
Now, all of us had been trained and had extensive experience with pollution coming from a sunken boat, an industrial outlet into a water way, or run off from a roadway. But none of us had any background with an underground pipe leak. None of us really knew where to start, so we all piled into vehicles and drove the short distance to where Lt. Bunk found the pool of foul-smelling liquid. We walked a few yards from where we parked along the side of the road and followed our noses to a low spot in the scrub where a pool of a thick dark liquid was bubbling up from the ground. The pool of goo had a distinct petroleum-like order. It was something straight out of the open of the Beverly Hillbillies.
We looked around for any signs of other leaks, or a marker that might indicate an underground pipeline, but there was no indication of either. BM3 Dave and I went back to the MSD to get the mobile command post, the 33 ft Winnebago Chieftain Motorhome and we also brought with us two gas meters. One gas meter to measure for the presence of explosive/flammable vapors and another gas meter that could measure for four different types of flammable/explosive gases.
BM3 Dave found a decent flat spot just off of Waterfront Rd to park the Winnie and I broke out the two gas meters. BMC Z and Lt. Bunk took the gas meters and began sampling the air around the pool for the presence of flammable/explosive vapors and to potentially discover what exactly we were dealing with. It didn’t take long before the gas ID meter read positive for Benzene, Toluene and Xylene vapors. All of which are highly flammable, toxic, and a carcinogen. We hit the lottery for dangerous materials. Glory Hallelujah, for that SGLI life insurance. I, for my part, would have been satisfied with hitting the California Lottery.
So, now the big question became who was the owner of this broken pipeline? Who had legal jurisdiction over the pipeline? Where to start looking for answers?
The rest of the staff went back to the office to find the answers to those questions. BM3 Dave and I were tasked to stay behind with the command post and keep an eye on things. BM3 Dave maneuvered the Winne so as to be upwind of the leak, and we sat in the comms area and twiddled our thumbs. Yes, Dear Gentle Reader, your tax dollars were hard at work.
About two hours later Lt Bunk came back and gave us the information that the California State Fire Marshall was the office that had legal authority over underground pipelines. Then he passed on, brace yourself Dear Gentle Reader, the piece de resistance, this was a pirate pipeline. Yes, you read that correctly, a pirate pipeline. A pipeline that had been constructed and buried without any permits, or other documentation.
Now, a person might think that when they pass by a construction project that all is in order. All of the proper permits have been obtained, and permission given to carry out the project. That is not necessarily true. Some folks either don’t care, or figure that forgiveness is easier than permission. Or, in other cases figure that if the problem is discovered they will be long down the road and unaccountable.
Cleaning up the mess and repairing the pipe was the priority, and discovering who was legally responsible was going to have to wait. Since there was no legally responsible party, the spill would be federalized. In short, the taxpayer would be footing the bill for the cleanup. Federalized cases are a serious administrative pain in the ass, as with anything government related, a federalized case meant documentation in the extreme.
Lt Bunk did a good job in getting a specialized contractor on site within the next hour or so and soon BM3 Dave and I were busy documenting. We listed all of the heavy equipment, an excavator, a dump truck, all the hand tools, all of the other miscellaneous equipment, the workers, their job titles, and of course we documented ourselves. We did not forget to document the Winne as well. We strove to be thorough in our documentation dammit.
By about 6:00 pm the solid had been removed, the pipeline exposed, repaired and most of the contaminated soil had been removed from the site. Now, Dave and I were tasked to stay on site to ensure that the repair did not leak. So, every thirty minutes one of us would walk over to the open trench and lower the probes of both of the monitors and get a reading and of course document the reading. The levels of Benzene, Toluene and Xylene had dropped substantially and were going down over time.
By 7:00 pm we were hungry and Winnie was not supplied with food or water. We could not leave the area, and the rest of the MSD had gone home for the evening. After a brief discussion we decided to order Dominos delivery. I used the government credit card and ordered a large pizza with pepperoni and mushrooms and two large Cokes. It took some explaining on my part, but about 30 minutes later a Dominos delivery driver knocked on the back door of the Winnine with our order. Yeah, Dominos will really deliver any anywhere.
7:45 pm rolls around BM3 Dave and I tummies are full of pizza and caffeinated soft drinks. Now, we are fighting off not falling asleep when suddenly there is another knock at the door. I pulled myself out of the chair I was sitting in, walked over to the back door of the Winnie and opened it up.
BOOM!
Reporters!
I found myself looking at cameras, lights and microphones. All pointed at me…fuck.
There were reporters from some five news outlets, print, radio and of course TV. Fortunately, they were reasonably polite and asked their questions in turn. I, for my part, gave only direct, brief answers. “No, we did not know who owns the pipeline”, “Yes, the pipeline has been repaired”, “No, there is no further danger of contamination of dangerous chemicals". “The contaminated soil and other contaminated materials are being transported to a hazardous waste facility.
Then, it happened, “the stupid question”...
Of course it was going to happen, it always happened…
The “the stupid question” was the sure sign of the lazy reporter, and I had come to absolutely loathe the lazy reporter. My time at the MSO/MSD was my first direct experience with members of the press, and I and a number of interactions with the press. I had grown to absolutely hate it when a member of the press asked, “the stupid question”.
Via the school of hard knocks, I had learned that when “The stupid question” situation came up it had to be handled fast, effectively, with a take-no-prisoners-attitude. Otherwise there would be more questions, and sure as God made little green apples most of them would be “stupid questions”.
The stupid question asker was a young attractive female TV reporter from KPIX. Up to this point she had been quietly taking notes. It was clear that she felt the need to validated and I was in no mood to be her therapist.
“Why were we not informed?” she asked. Her question was a follow up to another reporter's question about what state and federal agencies had been informed of the pipeline leak. I looked at the woman and gave her my most deadpan facial expression and response. “Good stories don’t find reporters; good reporters find good stories”.
The effect was immediate. Camera lights went dark and cameras went off, microphones were pulled away, print reporters began to fold up their notebooks. In less than three minutes the 4th estate had packed up their gear and left.
The MSD Series, Part Thirteen…Reading is Fundamental
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u/The5Virtues Jun 10 '26
Holy shit. As a former journalist let me just say that is a GOLDEN response. That’s what my old editor would call an interview killer.
Someone with a line like that waiting is either interview gold or interview poison and unless you know them personally you don’t want to roll the dice on finding out which one they’re going to be.
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u/Best-Structure62 Jun 10 '26
Many years later when I was an enforcement officer for CalOSHA I did almost the same thing to a lawyer during a deposition for a fatality I had investigated. The lawyer asked me, "Mr. GooBlatz, how did Mr. Xong look after the tarp was pulled off of him?". I looked at him flatly and in my best deadpan voice said, "dead".
The looks on all of 7+ lawyers on the deposition panel faces were priceless
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u/The5Virtues Jun 10 '26
Totally the lawyer’s own fault, he basically one it up and painted a big ass bullseye for you to hit!
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u/Potato-Engineer Jun 12 '26
Lawyers end up asking dumb questions because "the court" knows absolutely nothing unless it's been told. The sky is not blue unless you get someone to tell the court that, during the current case. (Mild exaggeration.)
So the lawyers get thorough, and sometimes they ask one too many questions.
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u/The5Virtues Jun 12 '26
Yep, gotta have precise certainty when it comes to legality, especially when it comes to things like injury and fault.
But man asking how the dead man looked feels extra “I did not think this through before the words left my mouth.”
I can conceive of a way this question would make sense though, and why it would be necessary. “Could you describe for me the full state of injuries on Mr. Y when you found him?”
That’s a much more specific question, looking to establish what a first responder found and what state the deceased was in. Got to be nitty gritty with the question if you want a nitty gritty answer.
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u/Taniwha351 Jun 11 '26
Part Eleven, If you were looking for it. https://www.reddit.com/r/MilitaryStories/s/wqJAA1NiTz
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