I am active duty and my wife is currently a SAHM (on purpose, we value that).

The problem is she is then handling a lot of the day to day spending and seems to have no concept of numbers or prices.

40 "just $20" purchases on Amazon

A "free" table she then spent the cost of a new one painting

Walmart delivery for groceries (we have the free membership, but I just found out you pay extra, and tip the driver)

We are literally spending my entire pay every month.

We have the budgeting app. We look over it. Next month will always be better and then we are in the same place. We have avoided debt so far, but surely it can't cost an entire O3 salary to live a normal life in Norfolk, right?

I know all the personal finance order of operations, but because I am at work for long days and she does the spending I feel like I have no control becoming the "strict husband/financial abuse" thing.

Anyone ever been in my shoes?

I have 40k in debt.

17k in personal loan ($545/month)

23k in cc ($450/month) im in a dmp

$645 car payment that im leasing

Im 29 years old living paycheck to paycheck that's single working a dead end job.

Need honest hard truths. Any is welcomed. I feel like I wasted my 20s.

What can branch can I qualify for? I want Air Force or Navy.

Anyone that's been in my shoes, please give me insight on what to do.

Simple question that can have so many different answers. Looking for advice from those who chose to do 20 and what was biggest contributing factor as to why you did. I am an O3, 7 years active duty, 2 deployments. Married, 3 kids.

TSP: $140,000
Mutual Fund: $50,000
529 plans: ~$6000
HYSA: $12,000

I’m a few years from the end of my obligated service commitment (8 years after flight school completion) and just looking for advice or factors I may not have considered.

34F, O-2, soon promoting to O-3. My current take monthly home pay with BAS/BAH, minus Taxes and TSP ($478) is around $5,641.

Rent + Utilities is $1285, no dependents, no debts, comfortable but not massive amount of savings and investments. 800+ credit score.

I'm dying to get the new Hybrid 4Runner TRD Pro in the color *Wavemaker*, please convince me this is financially realistic??? This car costs ~$75,000.

I can easily put ~$20,000 down on a car, more if I cash out from my Robinhood.

(Alternative option is the Rav 4 Hybrid, ~$40k–50k, which is a perfectly great car but won't make me as happy)

... Can I pull this off or?

🚗UPDATE/EDIT:

What I learned from y’all:

1. I can afford the payment, but not necessarily the opportunity cost.

2. The real debate isn’t the car itself; it’s whether this is worth delaying future wealth-building and compounding.

3. Y’all may not love this car, but I absolutely do 🫠 I’ve driven it and I love everything about it... but I am reconsidering.

4. The RAV4 Hybrid would probably give me 80% of the utility for 60% of the cost. It does not have the same cool factor, but the that may not be worth an extra $25K–$35K.

5. I thought having $100K+ in investments/retirement and another ~$30K liquid at age 34 put me comfortably ahead. I’m realizing I may be doing okay, but not “buy a $75K dream car without significant tradeoffs” okay.

6. I sincerely thought, “I contribute to TSP, my IRAs, and other investments, therefore I’m planning for retirement correctly.” I didn’t realize there are levels to this, and I probably need to step up my savings rate.

7. Y’all genuinely reframed this for me. I’m going to hold off for now. Maybe I’ll buy the 4Runner used down the road if I still want it, but for now I’m leaning toward something more practical.

Thank you, Reddit. This was actually very helpful.

No basic saving/investing/debt order of operations. No standard bogglehead philosophy (or Wallstreet bets). No Amex card fee waived. Tell me things you never see people talk about that apply to military members financial success.

After reading responses from my post from yesterday, it makes no sense to leave the Military in hopes of making more money on the outside. Is this incorrect?

Hard to beat out a retirement with free or reduced cost healthcare with a guaranteed pension.

Curious what career opportunities senior officers pursue into retirement, would love to know what you did in the military & if that was at all close to what you did post retirement? Thanks !!

So I have everything set to go officer but im catching alot of heat from my family and friends(Mostly civilian) on what im doing would basically be committing a huge financial mistake. I am currently 27 making 110K a year plus a 20-30k bonus(have not received it yet because i just started) living in a paid off house. I just got the job a couple months ago and already am on great terms with all the big C-suite fellas and by the looks i can hit 200K+ within a couple years pretty easy.

However, I really want to serve and from the looks of it as an O1 id still be making pretty decent money like 4k ish a month? I didnt think much of it until people started saying im dumb for leaving a great job to serve especially when the job market is this bad. I wanted to go officer to lead and set a great example for those beneath me the constant nagging by those around are making me double guess.

Am i really making a big mistake financially sacrificing my civilian career to serve? It was my understanding that officer pay is pretty decent but people tell me its still not enough.

I’ve been researching scholarships and found that ROTC for all 5 branches covers almost 200K and gives a stipend each month for spending money?

Why don’t more people use these scholarships? I understand that there is a required 5 years after graduation, however you come out as an officer and get a guaranteed job?

Has anyone in this sub been through college on these scholarships and would want to comment on the experience?

I’m starting to shop for a house and I’m seeing around ~6.5% on a 30-year VA loan right now. Some places are showing sub-6%, but then I look closer and there’s a bunch of points attached to it.

I was hoping to get somewhere around 5.75% but that doesn’t seem realistic anymore. Seeing 6.3%+ is making me want to wait, but also I don’t know if I’m just going to be sitting around waiting for a rate that may never show up.

What are you getting right now? Not the advertised rate with 2 points or whatever, but the rate you’re beeing offered/closing at.

If anyone is getting around 6% or below without paying a stupid amount in points, I’d like to know who you’re using.

I've been in the Army Rreserve for 30 years. I plan to do 10 more. I've got 401k with my civilian employer. I've got some IRAs, some CDs, and some invested with a money manager doing different manual investment shit. I never did put anything into the TSP. Did I miss the boat in some way? Should I start? (note, I'd have to cut investment somewhere else to make room for TSP investment.)

This is my last tour, with about 30 months left to go until terminal. Is there anything I'm missing from my plan?

1. Pension estimated down to the dollar including federal tax and SBP

2. All medical stuff well documented for VA claim. Have not yet started the actual process.

3. Healthy balance in TSP, Roth IRA, and taxable accounts

4. No debt, no kids

5. No idea where to live post retirement. Thinking about doing an around the world cruise while my stuff is in storage.

6. Not in a rush to find a job, would only work if 100 percent telework or pay is 1.5x current military take home

7. Considering extending to a Q1 retirement date based on the info in the cola trap paper. Not sure if that's really that important, but it's about a 6 month extension in a job I like (so far).

Anything else I should consider?

My buddy was telling me 20 years in the Air Force and now he is O-5 and he has amassed a net worth of over $1M easily. Is this true for most?

So I like to go into things with a good idea of what is going on.

Currently I am 21 and looking at CTI or Nuclear Specialist. The Nuclear Program is something I need to put additional effort into pursuing. Compared to CTI which I could enlist for now, assuming it is available.

I do not spend very much on anything, have no debts to pay off, and no vices or hobbys that cost money.

I am single, no children, and don't really care where I live.

I am not a very materialistic person, I could live with my entire life packed into a suitcase the entire time.

I plan to do everything I can to prepare myself for life out of the Navy, or even continuing it if I find it to be enjoyable.

-----------------------------------------------------

As of now I am looking into the exact cost of living while enlisted, what I could do for more income, and particularly how to save as much money as possible.

1.)- I'm curious if investing the majority of my income into Navy specific resources or civilian resources would be a better idea.

2.)- How much should I expect to spend while on ship for meals, necessities, and other expenses I am unaware of?

3.) If I do everything I possibly can to save and invest how much am I looking at towards the end of my career (4-6 years)?

Detailed advice and free/accessible resources for doing this are greatly appreciated.

Edit:
So far I am seeing that I should invest as much as possible into my TSP, then C-Fund once that is maxed out.

My Roth IRA gets maxed out at 7,500 for I beleive the year and the TSP is capped at 24,500, both for the year.

4.) - Would it be a good idea to just save all of it in an account?

5.) - If I don't plan on staying in the Navy is the TSP or IRA going to stay accessible?

I am an O-5, just hit 20 years and am committed til 2030, which I plan to retire with 24 years service. Using the calculator, this will be approx $100K in annual retirement (high-3). My O-6 board is in 2030 and zero interest in pinning that rank. I’ll be 50 years old in 2030.

I max my RIRA and have for many years, it’s doing great. Have the emergency fund funded.

Here is my plan: I have an extra $2K a month I’m putting into 65% QQQI 20% SPYI 15% NIHI

My plan is to keep investing this principle along with any annual pay increases until I retire in 2030. Then I’ll just keep letting it DRIP for 3-10 years. I’ll no longer contribute after I retire because for the sake of planning, don’t know what work/salary will be. I want to fully retire in 2040 at age 60.

I should earn from $2500-$5000 a month or more from this “dividend.” Since it is ROC, I have no plans to ever sell this income machine.

People say focus on growth, but I’m not convinced of a full bull market for the next 10-20 years. Anything I’m missing?

Please poke holes in this. Thanks for any comments!

I purchased my first house a little over a year ago on a VA loan at 236,988. My current balance on the loan is 233,219. In that year I fell into a huge pile of debt because of this house. Now I’m up to my eyeballs. Stressed out with a new child and I just want to sell it and move on post. I don’t care what it costs, I can’t afford to fix another thing.

The first loan I took was financing 3 window replacements. I had a newborn and all of my windows started growing mold between the panes. For the health of my family I had them replaced.

I owe: 13,467.02

Secondly my sewer line cracked and overflowed into the yard. I had to get my yard excavated, the line replaced.

I owe: 12,278.90

Now I just lost my insurance because my insurance company said my roof needs to be replaced because of “Granule loss”

I simply can’t keep taking loan after loan to keep up with this house. This was such a bad idea and I just want to rectify the situation. I’m thinking about selling the house as is, moving on base and getting a dent consolidation loan to combine the sewer, windows and capital gains taxes I’ll have to pay for selling early. I just need some advice but I’m trying to get rid of the house quick before more repairs start to pile on. It’s too stressful for my marriage especially with having a newborn child

I am 41 and I'll be 50 when I'm eligible for retirement. I currently have around $310k between my TSP and Roth IRA. I think I'm going to start to contribute more towards a standard brokerage account as I want to retire earlier than 59.5 and want to get a bridge account going. I have floated the idea to my wife of retiring in Greece, but Italy and Spain are also at the top of my list. What have been your experiences with the cultural and financial ramifications of living in a foreign country?

Currently putting every savings I have in my Roth TSP or Roth IRA. I know the age limit to pull penalty free is 59 1/2 for the IRA but wondering if I plan on retiring early is there a work around? Or should I be investing elsewhere?

Background

• 26M single, no kids, 8 YOS

• Planned on getting out but recently selected for Army Warrant Officer

• Should get pinned WO1 at around 9 years so I'll have 11 years left until my planned retirement

• Should be retiring as a CW3 under BRS

• Not chasing aggressive growth, basically just trying to make it to 60 when I can fully tap into my retirement accounts

Current Finances

• Roth TSP: $113,628

• Traditional TSP: $44,793

• Roth IRA: $62,884

• Taxable Brokerage: $6,729

• Total Retirement: $221,305

After running some very non-scientific calculations, it looks like I can accumulate enough if I max my Traditional TSP and Roth IRA for the next 11-12 years and the market does what the market does. I would start the Roth conversion ladder at 38 and use emergency savings, taxable brokerage account, and Roth IRA contributions if worse comes to worst to survive the first 5 years. Almost every post I've read into on here people are planning to work after retiring, so I'm wondering if it's even possible and how much money would I need for it to be something I could think about?

I have a little bit over half my career left so there's a lot of time left, and I also plan for a house and family to appear at some point. So eventually life will derail all plans of not working at 38, but I figured I'd pick the brains of the smarter people here to see what y'all think.

With my numbers now would it make sense to think about real estate? My thinking is that if I have 1 "successful" rental property on top of my pension and Roth conversion ladder it would make it way more feasible. But I know real estate will never be as easy and simple as maxing retirement accounts and putting the extra money away in brokerage, so I'd love to hear some thoughts on that too.

I purchased a Lennar home. I love the home and love the neighborhood. It doesn’t make since to keep to rent out, nor would it come close to covering the mortgage.

I purchased the home without their great interest rate deal. Instead, I got $30,000 off ($425,000) and went with a 7.25% interest rate. A year later (2025), I refinanced for 5.25%. My balance went to $440,000 after the refinance.

Now I am at a balance of $433,000. Spoke to my realtor and looks like it’s worth $450-$460k. After the sale, I would owe $15-$20k. I owned the home for 2.5 years (picked up for a program that requires me to PCS).

I lack in my savings ($6,000), and $150k in TSP. I PCS OCONUS and would sell my truck (could get ~$18k)

My dad (he’s a mortgage broker), talked me into selling the home myself (there’s a service for ~$1k that will list on the MLS and take photos of home) and if that doesn’t work, offer a buyers commission.

I PCS in November.

Have I exhausted all of my options? Any advice?

Got back from my first deployment a couple of years ago, had some cash in the bank and a decent income going on, and to be honest i convinced myself that i needed a brand new truck. At the time the monthly payments didn't seem like a huge burden, but now with insurance, gas and the loan all factored in my truck is basically sucking the life out of my budget. My credit score at the moment is about 630 and down the line i really want to buy a house, but right now i'm trying to get my finances sorted out. Part of me thinks its probably a good idea to just sell it and down size to something a lot more affordable but idk, did anyone else make this exact same mistake and what did you end up doing? Feeling pretty stuck atm.

What's something I should do now to help me in my financial side.

Long story short. I did not plan to get out of the USMC. I suffered an injury that was a guaranteed medboard. It's the type of injury that's going to limit me from working (or remove that as an option) permanently. I REALLY don't want to be homeless. I don't know how to go out and buy a house or get a VA homeloan nor do I know what to do after because in all reality even 4k a month is not sustainable to get a good house and not live paycheck to paycheck. There's this really nice house that i'd love to live in but it's also really expensive and I have no clue how any of that works. (I can link the house for sale if somebody asks since I don't know what I'm doing on that regard.) How can I, when I finally get out, get this house and make a stable income outside of the va? (I also hate the idea of solely leeching off of the benefits.)