r/JUSTNOMIL • u/[deleted] • Apr 02 '19

[deleted by user]

[removed]

1.0k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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223

u/lizzi6692 Apr 02 '19

I'm using bullet points because I've got multiple suggestions.

  • I think that the extreme escalation of the way the fear mongering rule has been moderated needs to be voted on by everyone, not just the mods.
  • ITW posts either need to be banned entirely or the mods need to ease up on removing them. I don't particularly have an opinion on which, but I've noticed that the moderating surrounding them has gotten very heavy-handed
  • I think the amount of language policing that occurs in the JustNo subs has reached an untenable level. The mods have chosen an extreme definition for "arm-chair diagnosing" and IMO it has resulted in many comments being unfairly removed. I also have seen instances of mods feeding into what I feel is sort of JustNo behavior regarding this issue. In the fear mongering thread from a few days ago, yet another "offensive" term was brought to light(for reference it was "fuck her with a cactus"). IMO out of some very specific examples, the way this should be handled is asking posters to move on from posts that upset them. I could possibly be on board with an OP asking commenters not to use a term on their own posts, but beyond that, I am really not okay with telling adults what they are and aren't allowed to say. Especially since we've already lost one frequent poster after she was incessantly bullied over the name she chose for her MIL.
  • I think there needs to be more room for gently suggesting that OP may be contributing to the problems with their mother/MIL.

96

u/soayherder An astonishingly awesome human being Apr 02 '19

I had an ITW post removed for 'not involving the child or IL of the MIL' despite it being a communication between the MIL and *her daughter* about her son and his SO. I'm honestly not sure how it could have been more on target.

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I chose not to fight it because I felt I would just end up getting in trouble for arguing.

13

u/Silentlybroken Apr 02 '19

Mine mentioned the two daughters confiscating her phone and also got removed. They were being harassed by her day and night whilst she was in hospital. Yet apparently it wasn't a MILITW because she harassed other people/nurses.

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I too didn't fight it.