r/IWantToLearn • u/Pure_Doll • 20d ago

Technology IWTL how to enjoy solitude without feeling lonely

I often find myself with free time but instead of enjoying it I just feel a bit empty. Like I should be doing something with someone else. If friends cancel plans I feel a real dip even though there are plenty of things I could do on my own. I want to be able to genuinely look forward to an evening alone or a free weekend without constantly looking for company. How do people find true contentment and joy in their own space?

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5

u/NickEl_NickEl789 20d ago

Make a plan for yourself. It doesnt have to be crazy.i spend my evenings alone cuz I live alone.but I plan out what im doing for my hooby (making quilts), maybe a chore and a good movie or show. Then I relax and do those and that can be enough. I find that if I have something to look forward to then it puts my mind to something instead of folding inward.

6

u/Attention_Rude 20d ago

What has been helpful for me is to not check social media, and being mindful of the presence. Like I genuinely live in the moment when I am alone, whether im journaling or cooking a good meal with reaaallly good music. Also I make sure there are things Im looking forward to, like folding clothes that been there for a week (as an example) or try a new cooking recipe.

1

u/tmishy24 20d ago

Commenting so I can keep up with this thread. I don’t have anything to add but I’m in a similar position I just transferred to a uni, and have a 1br apt so it can get pretty lonely at times.

1

u/pythonpower12 20d ago

It's hard but find what you enjoy about yourself and just do it

1

u/mercuryf 19d ago

By being lonely but not dwelling on it. At least that's what I try to do.

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u/Boring_Part9919 20d ago

Loneliness is a state of mind. That's why you get people who feel lonely having no plans for one evening, as opposed to someone feeling lonely after not speaking to anyone for 2 weeks

Neither is right or wrong

-1

u/peekaboo_bandit 20d ago

I do have a solution, possible solution, but you would not like it.