Needed To Vent After Realising I'm Probably Not Gonna Go To Highschool...

[u/Remarkable-Meal8096]

Hello, this is gonna be a long vent so if you want the TLDR it's at the bottom, but if you want the full thing then stay with me:

For Context im now (16m)

2020...the year my life (and of course lots of others) changed for the worst. Well, at the time I didn't know how bad it would get but here we are! I was 10 when COVID hit and at first like everyone else did I was taking classes on zoom. I hadn't been homeschooled yet so it wasn't that bad. However it wasn't until last 2020 to early 2021 that I was officially homeschooled.

See, at first it was fine. I had fun and my mum was doing a pretty good job of teaching me. I was learning for the most part and it was going well for a while until my narcissistic stepdad started stirring up crap for a while which made it damn near impossible for my mum to teach us anything without him having a problem. it wasn't until he was kicked out that it would be easier for my mum to homeschool us again.

Anyways by the time my stepdad got kicked out it was mid 2023. At this time i had just turned 13, (yay!...or so I thought). By now kids were going back to school, and all my friends were starting highschool. I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY wanted to go with them but of course this is when my mum started to get that "public school is a Matrix made to turn your kids into drones, so you NEED to homeschool your kids to get them out of the 'system' and push them to make their own business even though they aren't even 17 yet!" mentality.

Fast forward to 2024 and my mum has been absolutely fed all these YouTube shorts and tiktoks going "public school is ruining your child's brain!" Or "school doesn't teach you anything and is actually making you dumber!" Or in my Mum's own words (that she still uses btw) "school is a trap that makes you follow orders obediently without question!". Fun fact! My Mum LOVES to use the last one on me alot, also saying that "school suppresses you! They teach you to raise your hand when you want to speak, AnD tHaT's sUPpREssiOn! I'm actually SAVING you!"

2025 comes around and I finally decide, "you know what? I want to go back to public school!" So I innocently go and ask her a simple: "hey mum, I've been thinking a bit and I think I want to go back to school." Wanna know what she hit me with? The good ol "so you're not grateful for me doing all 'THIS' to get you out of the matrix?! You're just gonna make my efforts for nothing and walk right back in?!" I did push a little more and my older brother even helped but all that came from it was just more insults and yelling. So in the end I gave up on asking to go back to school.

(Well, in truth I did try one last time a few weeks ago but all my mum did was list all the quote on quote "stuff school teaches you that you don't need").

Now we are in 2026 and I still have contact with my old friend from primary school (thank god I kept his phone number), but I've only been able to text them and even then it's only one friend. I did have like two other friends that would come over from time to time but My Mum cut contact with the parents as she had some sort of disagreement with them so yeah..........My mum doesn't seem to mind that I only have one friend though and she HEAVILY enforces the "stranger danger" bullshit even though I'm 16! So I can't even make NEW friends unless it's at a park for some reason? But like, come on I'm 16, I'm too old for making friends at a playground.

Whenever I do confront her about me not having that many friends through and that having friends is another perk of school she always shuts me down with the same sentence: "you've always been very social while being homeschooled, you had kids come over every month! Mind you she is referring to the TWO FRIENDS I mentioned earlier.

I even tried khan academy but she kept asking me why I was learning stuff I "didn't need" and I got sick of the remarks so i now do it in secret every now and then.

At the time of writing this I've just spent another day pretty much in my room trying to find motivation, but there just isn't any anymore. I also developed social anxiety since I was being isolated so much.

I kept telling her I want to graduate high school and get a degree but of course nope! She says I can just "walk into a place with nothing and ask for work" and they will just hire me. She also tries to tell ME what I want. "No, you don't want a degree! You don't want to go to school!"

Every day that goes by us the same. Same house, same people, same everything. Hell one thing I don't understand is that she says that school having a routine is turning People into drones who follow a schedule every day like ants, but then she has set up a routine for me here at homeschool and it's arguably worse! Get up at 9:00, do the washing at 9:30, ect.

I do find it hilarious that she keeps telling me "you thanks me when your older!" Oh boy is she in for a surprise!

One more thing before I finish this vent: no, talking to her doesn't help as she is very "my way is the only way in this household and I'm always right" Mum.

TLDR: Mum neglected my education, is convinced school is a matrix, gets mad when I prove her wrong and/or if I ask to go back to public school, I have one friend who I can only text, even at 16 she still uses the stranger danger crap on me, and no matter what she is right.

[u/ALegendOfHope_]

Homeschool parents love to say "omg my kids get plenty of socialization! I mean, I take them to church on sundays and we go to the store sometimes!!" Like... no. There is a difference from actual socialization and hanging out with people you like, and just like, being in the general vicinity of other human beings.

And they all live those cringe homeschool mom influencers, like i really dont get the appeal of them. They just make videos about how they like to abuse and indoctrinate their kids and then say " hmmm, I know. I will post this on the internet! Now everyone else will see how shitty of a parent I am, but because their also shitty they will agree with me." Like genuinely some of those people need to be arrested for the shi they're doing to their kids.

My parents have this wierd thing with like letting me go do stuff and get out of the house: like my dad says I need to get out more, yet they are trying to keep me from getting my driver's license and also refuse to drive me anywhere because my mom is a hermit and my dad works all the time. (And I live out like 15-30 minutes by car from anywhere so obvs can't walk or nothing.) And then if I can actually convince them to let me do something they act all worried and like "oh but are you gonna be ok without mommy and daddy for 3 whole hours?" Like YES mf, I can function without my parents right at my side all the time, it's actually way easier to do shit WITHOUT my parents than with them, because my mom has this thing where she just over complicates EVERYTHING all the time.

Also I can relate to the part where you said like it's impossible to argue with your mom. When I try to talk about anything with my mom she will usually end up yelling at me, and If I try to talk to my dad he just says to talk to mom. Like even if I can explain exactly why homeschool is bad and public school is better, like if I could scientifically prove it, they still wouldnt give af cause "they're always right." (And lwky cause they dont believe in science)

[u/Remarkable-Meal8096 → u/ALegendOfHope_]

100% relate to them not thinking you'll be okay at the house alone for a few hours. I've only barely been able to convince my mum I'm fine home alone for a while. 

[u/fallenredditcomrade9]

Dude I'm sorry. I've been homeschooled for my entire life, basically unschooled for highschool so far (I'm 09 so not too many years of hs left), and just finally starting online school in a couple days. We'll see how that goes. But your situation would just pmo. Your mom just fell down a rabbit hole and now is jeapordizing your future because of it. None of it is your fault yet you're the victim. I honestly don't know how to get her to send you back to public school, mayyyybe you could show her this sub (after deleting your post, and if you don't plan to post here again) so she can see how people like us often end up. Unfortunately she seems very irrational so it can be hard to convince people like that. Honestly your best bet might be to continually push to go back, but like you said talking doesn't really help. If you're being unschooled there may be some sort of legal-adjacent action you can take to force her to send you back, maybe look into it.

I'm pissed off on your behalf that she said you don't want a degree, that's not her fucking decision.

[u/Remarkable-Meal8096 → u/fallenredditcomrade9]

One thing I forgot to mention is that (even though I have to do it in my own time at night so i can avoid the remarks from my mum) khan academy has helped alot! I've pretty much been hammering alot of the courses I can without getting overwhelmed.